Would you have said something?

[Peterpickedapickledpepper]

So took DD to a farm today (DH is working so went alone). She's 1.5years old so limited speech herself but seems to understand most basic things (relevant!). She pointed at a little mechanical ride which I told her she could go on so she got very excited. I set her into it & gave her the coins to put into the slot (it cost 50p). The 2x20p were fine but our 10p coin kept coming out.

As I lifted her out of the ride to go to the kiosk directly beside, another child approx 3/4 years old ran at the Car and asked his mother for a ride. She said no. I explained that I'd just put 40p into the ride for my DD & I was just going to change my 10p coin as my only coin was being rejected (I was next in the queue so would have been less than a minute). She waited until I was getting my 10p exchanged & I heard her say to her child "since it'll only be 10p, you can have a turn" and proceeded to put 10p into the ride!

I then only had 10p left in coins so had to tell DD she could in fact not use the ride (the farm had no cashpoint and all I had was a debit card). She cried and pointed at the boy now riding the machine not understanding & the mother turned her back to ignore me.

I was shocked & didn't know what to say so I left without saying anything. I was so annoyed by the incident that I phoned DH at work to have a rant & he said I should have had it out with the mother as that was ridiculous or asked her for 40p to let DD have her ride.

What on earth would you have done in this situation? If someone had used the machine while I had my back turned and I hadn't told them I had my money in it, that would be completely my fault and I wouldn't have an issue but I told this woman I had used all my coins and was going to swap a 10p so DD could have a ride! I know in the grand scheme of things that it's a very minor issue but I'm still reeling & feeling guilty for breaking a promise to DD which yes she's probably already over but nonetheless!

Absolutely I would have said something, the cheeky mare!

That's an unbelievable cheek! Yes I would have said something but I can totally understand why you were too shocked to do so.

I would have asked the woman for the 40p. She knew very well what she was doing.

Often there is a coin reject button to get all your money back in this situation.

Wow, that mother is a CF,

I think in hindsight you should have either pressed the button to return your coins until you had the 10p,

Or asked the mother if she could change your 20p for two 10p coins

She knew what she was doing though didn't she, what a CF

Absolutely I would have said something.

I would have said something and I’m normally quite hesitant about confrontation in front of my kids. Fact is she stole from you and you let her get away with it.

Much as I like to think I'd have said something, I know I couldn't be trusted not to lose my temper so would have done exactly what you did, OP. What a nasty thing to do.

So she stole your 40p? Yes, it's only 40p but it's still stealing.

Yes, you should have said something, but sometimes when you come across someone who just rides roughshod over you like that it can be hard to speak up. Changes are you would have been on the end of a mouthful of abuse.

It sounds as though she misunderstood you and thought you were saying you'd left 40p in there, if her child wants a ride.

Yes of course I would have said something.

Thanks everyone. I know it's silly and ridiculous & happened 2 hours ago but I'm still really angry! I pressed the coin reject button but it didn't return my coins Just kept repeating in an automated voice that I needed to insert another 10p for the ride.

Whoops updated my username & the app has reverted back!

So now I've worked out how to use the app with my actual current username, it looks like I also need to work on my assertiveness from the replies! I wish I had said something now!

Of course she was wrong to use the money that you’d put in there and especially if she knew you were coming back to use it. Are you sure she didn’t mishear what you said and thought you weren’t returning? If not then yes she’s certainly very rude and you should’ve asked her for 40p there and then.

Either way I don’t think you should be “reeling” over an incident such as this and upset over a broken promise! That seems like a rather dramatic way of putting it tbh. It’s not like you’re a bad parent and your DC will never trust you again, I think the key thing is to move on and not dwell on it after the event. I don’t think I’d have phoned Dh specially either, couldn’t it wait till you had a chat when you saw him next?

Why make it a conflictual situation? She clearly misunderstood you. All you needed to do is smile and explained the confusion and that you didn't have any more change. In all likelihood she'd have been very apologetic and given you the 40p. Why didn't you at least give her the chance before seeing your daughter all upset?

Try not to dwell on it OP. Hindsight is a wonderful thing and all that. Sometimes we all get caught out in situations like that because it can be hard to believe the cheek of people.

Exactly swingofthings

Also, if I was at work and my DH phoned me to tell me something like that, I'd be a bit about it and ask why it couldn't have waited til I got home.

Swing how did she misunderstand? She told her son as it was only 10p he could have a ride. She knew the OP had put her 40p in and was going to get another 10p.
The woman was wrong.

GreatDuck because she probably thought the OP was saying there was 40p in there already, so the woman only had to add another 10p.

The OP told her that she was going to exchange her 10p because it kept getting rejected. It's pretty obvious that the OP was coming back to use the ride.

It does sound like she 'thought' you were giving her 40p, you should have put her straight but sometimes people just gobsmack you! Could you have left your child in the ride if you were next to it?

I still think she may have misunderstood

But we'll never know. As a PP said, there's a chance the woman may have been apologetic if the OP had spoken to her.

"Oh excuse me, I think you misheard me. That's my 40p in there. I'm just changing up this 10p"

That's not confrontation, it's just normal interaction.

@WorraLiberty she definitely didn't misunderstand. She saw me leave the ride and my belongings next to it (I couldn't carry my multiple bags and buggy while carrying DD) so it was clear I was coming back- DD's water bottle was still on the ride seat! & join the kiosk queue less than 2 feet away to get my money changed.

Well in that case you should have said something

But as you felt unable to, you might as well put it out of your mind.

I'm baffled to why people think she thought the OP had left the 40p for her. It doesn't make sense. The OP told her that she was exchanging the 10p. Why on earth would anyone leave the money in for a stranger?

The woman was a complete and utter bitch.

Shame you couldn't say that to her, but her child was there.