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Original poster

To expect DH to be home for father's day

27 replies

doeeyed · 05/06/2007 19:53

DH has offered to work on father's day although he did'nt realise at the time it was father's day.

I pointed this out to him and his boss has said if it is a problem he does'nt need to work.

DH has just come home and said
"Well father's day is just commercial rubbish anyway"

So he is working.

DS and DD are 5 and 4 so they won't know the difference,but I feel miffed that he choose to work.

Beraing in mind he has been away for 3 business trips over 3 weeks recently.

OP posts:
fryalot · 05/06/2007 19:55

dp away partying with his mates in Helsinki for the entire weekend.

He says "father's day just commercialised crap anyway"

so not going to bother getting them to make him a card or buy him a present or anything.

We'll do something fun without him instead

lailasmum · 05/06/2007 19:55

It personally wouldn't bother me if my hubbie was away for fathers day. I only see him about 4-8 days a month anyway as he works away from home so am used to it. You could always postpone it to another day and have a nice day another time and use it as a reason to make sure the nice day happens.

nickytwotimes · 05/06/2007 19:57

i'm afraid i'm an old cynic. my dh's family buy presents and make meals for all the "days" in the year, whereas my family don't do anything! i think it's a load of commercial nonsense, but i can see why you'd be miffed if he's been away a lot.

Chirpygirl · 05/06/2007 20:03

DH's father's day present is to be able to spend all day at a bike meet without us and without me complaining that we haven't seen him all day. Sounds fair to me! and it won't cost me a penny!

I shall get DD to draw him a nice scribbley picture and be done with it.

CorrieDale · 05/06/2007 20:07

Well, he has a point re: the commercialisation. After all, Mothering Sunday came about years and years ago so that servants could have one Sunday a year when they could go home and see their mothers. I suspect Hallmark have had more to do with Father's Day.

Personally, I'd love to spend most of Mother's Day in bed! DH would go along with that. If he wanted to work on Father's Day or go out on his own, then I couldn't really object.

ChasingSquirrels · 05/06/2007 20:10

dh goes to Le Mans every year, which is on Father'd Day every year, which is ALSO when his birthday is. He gets birthday cards but I don't think we have done fathers day card every year, although I have done some, not sure what we are doing this year, probably get ds1 to make him a birthday card and leave it at that. He just gets some pressies, I don't split them as fathers day / birthday.

madmarchhare · 05/06/2007 20:11

Yes, I go with the 'he can do what he wants' brigade. Its fathers day after all. It is a load of old crap anyway.

Unless you children are particularly looking forward to it for some reason, which they aren't, then I dont think it matters.

Speccy · 05/06/2007 20:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Speccy · 05/06/2007 20:16

This reply has been deleted

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edam · 05/06/2007 20:17

Mothering Sunday was originally a church festival (still is) and the 'mother' bit refers to the church, not to mothers as such.

Father's Day is just a commercial invention. But since it exists, then guess fathers get to do what they want to do on that day.

lilymolly · 05/06/2007 20:20

agree commercial crap........let him do what he wants

for whats its worth my dp thinks mothersday is commercial crap and never bought me card for my FIRST mothers day, then I WAS pissed off

crokky · 06/06/2007 12:46

I might be alone in this, but I don't think father's day is just about fathers!

It is also about DCs - teaching them to say thanks for their dad/making a card to show appreciation. Different if DCs are tiny, but your DCs are old enough to understand what is going on. Not that familiar with this age group, but might the teacher ask on Monday "what did you do for your dad for father's day" and DCs feel left out?

I don't think it sets a good example.

kslatts · 06/06/2007 13:18

My dh is working on Father's day, he works shifts so doesn't have much choice, our dd's don't seem to mind, they will probably give them a small present and he will get breakfast in bed.

Speccy · 06/06/2007 15:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Desiderata · 06/06/2007 16:01

I must admit, Father's Day is not something I've ever acknowledged, not with my own father, or with my dh.

When my ds gets a little older, I think I'll leave it up to him.

I think it's more likely the three business trips in three weeks that's got you down, doe

Blu · 06/06/2007 16:02

Isn't the issue more about the amount of time he spends working away and working at w/e rather than it being father's day?

Personally, I think expecting work to revolve around adult birthdays, mother's day, father's day etc is all a bit ridiculous, but would definitely sympathise if you feel he is just generally aay a lot and you would like him to spend more time with the family. Address that directly rather than getting hooked up about one rather spurious occasion, iyswim.

Blu · 06/06/2007 16:04

It would be a bloomin' insensitive teacher who asked a class in 'our' school 'what did you do for your dad on father's day?'

babygrand · 06/06/2007 16:15

Yes, your dh is correct. ("Well, Father's Day is just commercial rubbish anyway.")

You are being unreasonable.

doggiesayswoof · 06/06/2007 16:19

What Blu said.

And yes crokky - surely schools will avoid the whole father's day thing like the plague? And mother's day, for that matter?

mrsmalumbas · 06/06/2007 16:19

Didn't even know it was Fathers Day. Agree it's all a plot by the card and crappy present manufacturers. Ditto Teachers Day, Neighbour Day, Penpal Day, or any other crappy day they can dream up.

Now if you are feeling miffed in general about him being away a lot, that's a different issue. How about you all planning a special day out together as a family when he next has a free weekend? Or get a babysitter and the two of you go out for some couple time...

Blu · 06/06/2007 16:21

When IS father's day?

LowFatMilkshake · 06/06/2007 16:21

If you're DC's wont know any different then I would'nt be too bothered, but if school are making a big thing like making cards etc, I would point out it means a lot to the DC's and ask him to come home.

My DD is excited because she has helped choose some PJ's for daddy for Fathers Day - because he's never had any before and she could'nt understand why, so I though Fathers Day was the perfect excuse for her to choose some for him!

I like to make a fuss of DH on the day because he is a brilliant daddy, and deserves things like a lie in and his fav roast dinner and to be in charge of the remote control etc etc!

Even if it is a commercial day - the only thing commercial he actually gets is a card. The rest is practical and with love.

Oblomov · 06/06/2007 16:22

17 June

Speccy · 06/06/2007 16:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

flossie64 · 06/06/2007 16:28

I won't see my DH on fathers day this year and my DD is realy upset cos she wants to give him a big cuddle ,she says.( he works away all week every week)
I cannot complain though as he has to go to visit his Mother ,along with his brother and spend the day going to scatter his recently deceased fathers ashes .
this just means that is what fathers day will mean to him in the future.I wish he was only going to work!