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Original poster

Second Marriage Divorce

29 replies

BabyGirlMama · 26/08/2018 14:29

Hi everyone, need your view here please.
I am divorced for the 2nd time ( been married to two guys and initiated divorce for both). Even though I don't regret or even question my decision, my second ex husband final words to me were'noone will even consider being with a lady who got divorced twice'. Not that I am willing to be in a relationship at all but his words made me wonder if that's true.
After all it is what it is in my case however have you seen any ladies in my shoes? Any cases similar to mine? How did life treat them?

OP posts:
Failbydefault · 26/08/2018 14:33

My sil was divorced twice and has been happily married (as far as I can tell) to my brother for nearly 30 years! Have hope.

Bluelady · 26/08/2018 14:38

My husband is my third. We've been married for 18 years, together for 20.

Awrite · 26/08/2018 14:38

My MIL has been divorced 3 times. She is happily living with her dp.

I remember once when I was ending it with a guy and he said something like "one day you will realise what a good guy I am and regret ending it.". His words were designed to make me question myself.

I just laughed at him trying to sound like a line from a film.

TooTrueToBeGood · 26/08/2018 14:43

He's talking ballcocks . I dare say some men might judge you negatively for it but if you think why that might be it's probably a good result for you. Me, assuming i knew you were the instigator, I would see it as an indication that you were a strong, independent woman who doesn't put up with shite. I'd say that's an attractive quality to a man who is genuinely looking for a partner and not a doormat.

SocialPiranha · 26/08/2018 14:45

I don’t have any anecdotes to tell you as such other than my (abusive) ex told me similar: no man will want me now as I’m damaged goods, over 30 (so clearly ancient) and various other hurtful things.

I’m perfectly happy with my life with my lovely new partner. People say horrible nasty things when they’ve been rejected. Especially people who are horrible and nasty themselves.

Singlenotsingle · 26/08/2018 14:46

What a load of rubbish. You've already had 2 men who wanted to marry you so I'm sure there must be loads more out there! Grin But do try to be a bit more picky next time!

ReservoirDogs · 26/08/2018 14:50

Third time for me too.

One for one year! (Together 4)
One for 10 years (together 14) one child
Now married 16 (together 18) one child

Ignore and move on happily!

redshoeblueshoe · 26/08/2018 14:52

I know a few people who have been married 3 or more times.
I know someone who is on the lookout for her 5th husband and she is still living with her 4th

Singles advice is good Grin

Original poster
BabyGirlMama · 26/08/2018 14:55

What a bunch of amazing girls you are!!!
From being hilarious to pointing out to certain views I never considered or thought of, I am really glad I posted this here.
Thanks all for your words and time 🤗🤗

OP posts:
3tothreee333 · 26/08/2018 14:59

When one door closes, another door opens to a better life with opportunities and adventures. Enjoy your new life !

Bluelady · 26/08/2018 15:02

We say I kept the best til last. It's true!

AynRandTheObjectivist · 26/08/2018 15:09

Well, they're more likely to look at, and commit to, a lady who is single and ready for love than one who's trapped in a miserable marriage for the rest of her life.

CripsSandwiches · 26/08/2018 15:12

Looking at it from the other way round if a bloke was twice divorced I would be a bit cautious and would want to know what happened (eventually I wouldn't ask on the first date) but I wouldn't rule him out completely.

Aprilshowersinaugust · 26/08/2018 15:14

I have the best dh ever.
Number 4!!
And I had dc when we met.
Lots.
Your ex is a twunt - but guessing you already know that!

SheWoreBlueVelvet · 26/08/2018 15:15

I've got two close friends happily on their third ( much longer than either of their first two)

Aren't people that marry more likely to marry again then never married.

Gemini69 · 26/08/2018 15:15

don't give him head space... you're divorcing him for a reason... Flowers

Ginkypig · 26/08/2018 15:19

Even at a relatively young age of 50 you could easily have three marriages of ten years behind you. Ten years is not a short relationship so why would it look bad on you?

funnylittlefloozie · 26/08/2018 15:21

My current BF has two ex-wives! I am cautious about him, because there is obviously a reason for it, but no red flags as yet. I also know both of the ex-wives in a professional capacity and they seem reasonably civil with him so at the moment its all ok.

I dont think you'll have any trouble finding husband number 3... but you might want to adjust your filters slightly!

Rebecca36 · 26/08/2018 15:26

That's just not true, especially a few years down the line. Plenty of people are married three times, I know someone whose third marriage is going strong after thirty odd years!

Do take your time though and good luck.

Cutietips · 26/08/2018 15:34

My SIL is on her third marriage (and two additional long term relationships). She’s so much more suited to this guy. They’ve got loads more in common and I can see why this one worked when the others didn’t.

InfiniteVariety · 26/08/2018 15:44

I have a friend who is divorcing for the 3rd time and already has someone new - she is an attractive woman.

NotTheFordType · 26/08/2018 15:46

my second ex husband final words to me

Were they his final words because you then pushed him down the stairs and buried him under the patio? Grin

I'm pretty sure he's talking bollocks and as a PP said, probably lashing out because he's feeling hurt and rejected. Understandable, but nothing you need to worry about.

DarthLipgloss · 26/08/2018 15:49

I'm in the process of getting divorced for the second time. I'm in a relationship with a wonderful kind handsome man who's 10 years younger than me (I'm late 40s).
We are really happy together.

enoughisenough2 · 26/08/2018 15:50

Third time lucky. That’s his opinion don’t worry 😉

KanielOutis · 26/08/2018 16:02

Subsequent marriages often end in divorce. When you have been through divorce it isn't so scary. It's a lot of hassle though. Anyone who looks down on you isn't worth giving the time of day.