AIBU to not take DS to my brothers wedding?

[fastfooder]

It’s my brothers wedding in 2months and I’ve been dreading taking DS he’s 1 and a half and goes to bed at 7pm on the dot. If we are anywhere but at home he goes into a serious meltdown and it gets so stressful. The wedding starts at 3pm then goes on till midnight it’s not close by so I can’t even bring him for the first bit then drop him home. I feel like my brother will judge me if I take DD who is 5 but leave her brother. She also sleeps early but will happily stay up till about 10pm which is the time we are thinking of leaving.
AIBU to leave him at home?

Heck no! Leave him at home with a sitter and go and have a blast!

He won’t miss out!

So long as you have someone you are happy to leave him with (and can put him to bed without a meltdown), do it.

DD went to a few weddings at that age, so I share your pain! However we did take her, as it was a chance for her to spend time with family (some for the last time, as it turned out). There was a fair bit of mingling between the ceremony and the meal which was the bit that worked best for her. We just accepted that we'd have to leave early - typically straight after the meal. She couldn't cope with a whole ceremony, one of us would leave part way through, so I'm really not suggesting it was the ideal day out for her.

Toddlers at weddings are frankly a bit of a pain so YANBU. Your DB will barely notice I imagine. Tell anyone judgemental that he’s not well.

My brother would never have cared less if my children had turned up at his wedding. Are they close? Is your son playing a role in the wedding?

There are ways and means (ie staying in a closeby hotel and you or DH taking DS to bed at usual time and one of you remaining at the wedding). Frankly, I'd just leave him home and go by yourselves!

Hell no!! Ditch the baby and have an amazing time! We were invited to a close friends wedding when DS1 was 14 months. He was invited too. We swiftly uninvited him and left him with his grandparents (first time he'd ever been left). Like your DS he was (and still is) a child of routine. He had an amazing time being the focus of attention for 24 hours (we went overnight, but it was only 30, minutes away if we'd needed to get back) and we thoroughly enjoyed our time with our friends. Other friends brought their one month old and the mum pretty much missed the entire day and evening.

It's not your problem what anyone thinks of you not taking him. Your circus, your monkeys. If anyone judges you it says more about them than it does you.

Go, have fun x

MustBeDueSomeBetterFeet
He does not have a role in the wedding however DB has a child the same age and it’s a very children friendly wedding so tbh I’m expecting to be judged. But my son being happy is more important then peoples judgmental views.