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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So upset and fed up of it all..

12 replies

VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:10

Sorry I’ve been on here a lot...

Posting in the wrong subject I think? Sorry about that too.. Just so down and everything feels so overwhelming. In the process of cutting all financial ties and become a single mum, have a baby and a toddler.

Work within the government with SC clearance, have worked there for 5 years and my clearance is up for renewal. I have ruined my own life with my financial situation and credit score. I had to finally bite the bullet and look as the form is absolutely brutal and wants every detail of my (terrible) financial situation.

I have no idea what to say to justify myself. I took out some pay day loans and a credit card when I was 19/20 and defaulted on absolutely everything. Most of my accounts have been closed and say 0 balance so assume they have given up chasing me but it looks absolutely terrible. According to Experian I have £5k of debt, all completed defaulted and never paid and even a CCJ which I didn’t know about until I received an attatchement of earnings order over a year ago.

There is no way I’m going to pass my clearance is there? I haven’t taken out credit in over 4 years, but obviously the damage is done. So now on top of having to be on my own I’m going to have no job too. I’ve never felt so close to giving up.

I actually felt optimistic again this evening after feeling really anxious for the past couple of days. Now I just feel like there’s nothing I can do to keep my head above water and look after my kids. My job is great, doesn’t pay much but they are so kind with flexible working and I feel comfortable there.

How will I find a new job with this on my shoulders? I don’t even want to complete the SC review, I just want to go in and tell them it’s not worth wasting their time on :(

OP posts:
Singlenotsingle · 22/08/2018 23:15

So SC is Financial Services, is it? I know they're very strict. Surely you could just get another job though? You must be reasonably well qualified to do that sort of work?

Original poster
VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:18

My experience is in finance though, who on earth is going to hire someone in finance with the worst credit score you can possibly have? :(

OP posts:
CrossFlannelCherry · 22/08/2018 23:18

Sorry I can't really offer you any advice but Flowers for you. Are you sure you will lose your job? I dont know how these things work.

Dancer12345 · 22/08/2018 23:19

I’m not sure how long things stay on your credit record but those things might disappear in a year or two. I know that’s no help as the vetting is now, but would it make any difference that they’ve been on there a while and will soon be removed?
I don’t know anything about security clearance so sorry if I’m wrong. £5k of debt doesn’t sound much though. I also imagine there’s a fair few people out there with CCJs.

I had a look online and it says the SC involves a credit check but the DV involves a reviewn of persona finances - so you won’t be getting that review, just the credit check?

Is there someone higher up you could discuss your worries with? They may be able to tell you of the likely outcome. Still do the review as it may not be as bad as you think, then if the worst happens cross that bridge IF you come to it.

Original poster
VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:22

Thank you Flowers

Sorry to sound like such a wet blanket but I really need this job. I’ve been googling and seen people accepted with debt and even CCJs but literally all 5 accounts I had when I was 19 are in default. My strategy was to bury my head in the sand once I got pregnant at 21 and just focus on providing for my DD as I was always so poor. My job isn’t a high grade at all but it is within finance. I worked in a coffee shop before then I’m starting to feel like my only option is to go back to something like that. I also how no idea how quickly they will come to the conclusion my clearance is not reviewed. I have 30 days to fill in the form and a few have past with me dithering about starting it because I knew the finance part was going to be awful :(

OP posts:
ThistleAmore · 22/08/2018 23:25

Do you have any current 'clean' credit agreements, such as a mobile phone contract?

If you were going for a new role with your CH, then yes, you probably would be screwed, but if it's just a review and it's merely defaulting rather than fraud or similar, you'll probably be okay, based on your work history.

Two things to ease your anxiety: stop catastrophising and chat with a higher-up, and then find a good advisor to help you get out of debt. I don't know where you live, but in Scotland, there are lots of good charities like Stepchange who can advise.

Original poster
VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:25

I’ve got friends there, proper friends I couldn’t bear to share this with anyone. I’m not sure what they could do anyway. I had hoped that I had worked trouble free in the same job the whole time I was struggling financially and racking up this debt would count for something, and it’s obviously not something someone could bribe me over - it’s a relatively small amount and there’s nothing dodgy about it, all just loans.

I had hoped like you said that there wouldn’t be a review but the form I am working on asks for absolutely everything to do with my personal financial situation - income, outgoings, amount of debt, number of defaults, all of it :(

OP posts:
incywincybitofa · 22/08/2018 23:26

I don't know what your role is, but when I had SC from the government poor credit could barr you from some roles but wouldn't others.
You need to be up front about it with whoever manages security clearance for your department and see whether it does affect your role/clearance. They will help if they can if you are honest and upfront and let them know before the check, if they can't keep you in the role because you can't get clearance, you have time to transfer within the CS before you need your clearance and so you job level may not be affected.

Original poster
VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:28

Thank you Thistle Smile

I know I sound very intense Blush

I love my job, they’ve been so good to me and there are chances to train and progress and really make something of myself. They’ve been so good to me with helping me work different work patterns too and they are literally all amazing people. I’d be so devastated and ashamed to lose this job. I think there is a possibility to get character references but the very thought of having to speak to my managers about this is overwhelming.

OP posts:
Original poster
VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:30

Thank you both for your responses, they’re making me feel much better.

I don’t want to be outing and I don’t know if I should even be talking about it but, my contract is basically limited to the place I work in where all the jobs are similar to the one I do now. I don’t think there will be much chance of transferring somewhere unrelated to my current role :(

OP posts:
Fatted · 22/08/2018 23:30

How long ago did you get into these debts? Has it been since your last clearance? Is it not something previously declared if you ran it up a while ago?

Original poster
VanillaBeans · 22/08/2018 23:34

I started the job 5 years ago and the debts were incurred shortly after starting. Although technically living with my parents my home life was hectic and I took out a series of loans to support myself. I got into a cycle of paying loans off, not having enough money to get by and taking out new loans. I was also 19 with a £3k credit card at one point and was frankly just incredibly irresponsible.

This all took place over the course of a few months and I haven’t taken out a loan since.

OP posts:
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