To ask what you do if you hate your job?

[TheDeuteragonist]

I'm really, really struggling at work.

The whole culture is built on micromanaging and finger pointing and it's causing me no end of stress. The boss is so far away from my values (think sexist, entitled, rude,etc) and I'm finding it really draining to work there.

What would you do?

I'm starting to move into freelance work and I would love to quit that and move full time but I need to build my client base first.

Problem is every day I dread going in to work. I regularly cry in the toilets and feel constantly on edge.

I had a job like that once and literally spent every spare minute I had applying for other jobs. After a few months. I got offered a temporary 6 month contract doing something I really wanted to do for much less money and although it was a risk, I took it as a way out. I couldn’t survive on that salary for long but it did pay off as it quickly led to another great job which was permanent and better paid. I would get through each day as best you can, try and learn anything positive you can from the company whilst being thick skinned about your awful boss. And just ask the universe every day to help you get a better suited job whilst contacting everyone you know in your industry to seek out opportunities. Don’t stay there, life is too short to be that unhappy at work. Good luck.

That was my last job lasted a week

No staff taking to each other

Fucking head teacher on long term sick leave
Stressed depty head

They were unable to attract any new staff cried every day u TIL dh said no fucking more started looking that week

I was in a similar position a couple of years ago, to the point where I was on the verge of just quitting without anything else lined up. Instead of doing that outright I set myself a deadline - if I haven't found a new job by x date I'm leaving anyway (obviously you need to build up some savings to consider this). I stuck it out and got a new job a few months later, same pay but a contract role with none of the benefits I had in the previous job. Once the contract finished they kept me on. It was worth it to get away from my crazy micromanaging boss - I now have a boss who respects me and trusts me to do my job.

Best of luck - I know how soul destroying a bad workplace can be.

I’ve worked fo myself for around 11 years. I hate it 90% of the time. I’m currently on ‘maternity leave’ I’m back next week when dd is 3 months due to the risk to business. I’ve been contacted by many clients while of who are irritated I’ve had a baby and I’ve spent the last few evenings doing work in preparation to go back.
I miss paid holiday, sick pay (I worked through a miscarriage, until I ended up in hospital, even then I was contacting clients from hospital) and I don’t have a pension. Don’t even get me started on having to talk to people all day. I’m scared to jack it in, in case I’m jumping from the pan into the fire. There’s no going back.

Sort of me at the moment. I left a job that in hindsight was well suited to me, for one that seemed like a step up in pay and responsibilities. In reality it’s been zero respect or autonomy, very misogynistic and political culture, and any skills are depreciating as I have a lot less to do. I said I would stick it out for a few months and 4 months in I know the extra money isn’t worth it. I’ve just spotted a great looking job and am spending a lot of time on my application, but if I don’t get an interview I fear I’ll be demoralised about looking for something else. Like you I need to grasp the mettle and put the effort in to change the situation as it’s not going to get better. I know it doesn’t help much but wanted to show solidarity and say good luck x

Thanks for all of your responses!

Looks like this isn't an uncommon thing, sadly!

I'm applying for jobs that I really like the look of and on PPs advice I'm going to set myself a deadline of Christmas for getting a new job.

It got so bad that I wrote my resignation letter yesterday and printed it out. I am so disappointed as when I started this job I thought it would be one to stick around in and now I can't wait to leave.

I am holding out until I have completed my application to foster, if I am not accepted I will go and work elsewhere, anywhere else in fact. The only reason I am not job hunting now is that it seems unfair to a new employer to start a job when I know I could be leaving in a few months.

I left my job due to bullying. I was crying everyday. In the end I had to resign. Some may have said the other person had won, as that was their mission. But a few years down the line I've grown my own company and am much happier.

These are more hating the company, not the job. I like my job, when the managers don't step in and fuck everything up by thinking they are clever. But we get paid the lowest in the country for what we do, despite being better than most thanks to the location. They think they can pay us less here for it. That's back firing now that most people, myself included are looking for work elsewhere with better companies.

Bluebells have you tried going back to your previous employer? Likewise the OP - as well as applying for advertised roles, have you used your network/past employers? We often don't think of going back for emotional reasons (pride, shame etc) and practical reasons (they've filled the post), but if they liked you, you might be surprised how understanding they'd be and they might have other work for you to do. It's happened to me twice and I've been very happy after going back to previous employers, once to a better role than the one I'd left. Maybe it's not an option for you, but worth considering. It does sound unbearable.

Yerroblemom1923

I hope you one day get to interview the bully. If they apply for a job with you, please go forward with it and make them squirm the entire time. Hate bullies.

Btw zigzag that sounds truly unsustainable. There really can't be "no going back", don't let the fear trap you into this life you hate, esp not with a 3mo. What would you tell your child to do, if this was happening to him/her? Know it must be incredibly tough at the moment, but please don't resign yourself to it. See a career coach and make escape plans!

Same position here, I'm well paid and I get on really well with my direct colleagues, have a flexible working arrangement that really suits me, and really enjoy some specific elements of what I do. But I hate it. I have a weird reporting line into someone very senior in the business who is very mercurial, doesn't listen well especially when you're telling him something he doesn't want to hear and will swear blind he told me to do X when I know damn well he told me to do Y and has now changed his mind and switches between micro-managing and being totally unavailable. Because of the structure of the business and politics an internal move isn't a possibility so I'm now faced with looking for another job which in all likelihood will be paid less and won't give me the same flexibility. Rock and a hard place

I am right now in a similar position. The micromanagement , possible corruption and misogyny plus loads of other stuff got to me in the end so I resigned last week . Yesterday I was told not to work my notice. Feel very strange today. Going in to finish off things with line manager who was not even involved in the decision yesterday , this am. Which says more about them than anything as it makes for a very disorderly leaving. ( bit like Brexit really )

@Licketysplits are you me?

A year ago I could have written your OP. I stuck it out for financial and confidence reasons. Also my manager who I struggled with was on a leave of absence.
However, I did set myself a deadline of 12 months to get out, organised coaching, took part in mock interviews, threw myself into other areas of the business and it worked for me.
I do think that setting yourself a deadline and refreshing your CV is sensible when thinking of moving jobs.

To an outsider I seem to have "hit the jackpot" with the company I work for, think recent promotion, good salary, large multi-national company, excellent progression etc etc, however, in reality it's sexist, racist, has a culture of drink and drugs being wholly acceptable. Good staff leave on a weekly basis while staff that don't care about the job and have no interest in it are kept on because of the low "headcount". Honestly, I get through each day by thinking about my salary and the level of experience I'm gaining. It's soul destroying.

There’s the saying that people leave bad bosses, not their jobs.
Last job I left I hated because the ethos was morally corrupt and very stressful (bullies, management not wanting advice or pro activity just arse-covering). I did not realise what effect it had on my health until I left.
Look at job adverts for the job you want (even if it’s not a location you can work) and start writing down how you would meet the criteria they ask for. Go through your work to find examples of where you’ve had impact. This way, you’re more prepared for completing the application form for a new job when it does come up and you’ve got your examples stuck in your head for interview fodder.
Good luck OP

I have just handed my notice in as I can't take the atmosphere that my boss creates anymore. I did hand in my notice before I had a job (had two interviews lined up) and the day after I handed in my notice I got a new job. It is a step down and fixed term but I am so happy to be getting out of here.

I had a job that I hated. The head was awful - she had her obvious favourites and those that she didn't like, she didn't know how to manage the budget, she couldn't manage the challenging pupils, she blamed others for her mistakes, she was unapproachable... I could go on but I'd be here all week. In the end I was signed off for 6 weeks and then my fixed-term contract came to an end and I didn't have to go back. I signed up with a couple of agencies and did short-term stuff until I got another post.

Thanks, Santaclarita. Oh karma seems to be doing a v good job of fixing things without me even intervening!

Get out of there ASAP! Your mental health is so much more important. I had a horrid corporate job a few years back, only lasted about 3 months… luckily my previous boss said I could go back to my old job next week, so I did  start applying and start interviewing as soon as possible! Even if you find something temporary, to give you more time to find something you will love.

I left a job I loved to work for DP he took a long time to convince me and I wish I’d never worked for him. I had a great ideas for the business and am driven but have been slowly demoralised by his Neanderthal partner blocking every idea I have had. DP got me to interview a new staff member I was overruled on who we should employ and despite my warnings we now have an awful apprentice who has caused nothing but trouble from day one. I am now so miserable I am looking for a new job.

Ohhhh, don't even get me started.

At my last job, I got a transfer in a different city (close to the old one), so I could live with my new partner. Same position, same money, just a different city.

I loved my job before, had a fabulous team and a boss who treated me like my own mother does.

Long story short- I took a leap and moved. Saying that I hated it doesn't cover it. My boss was a lunatic, she hated me from day one (why?!), and she got used to give me tasks that were in fact hers! After 9 months of being pestered and pissed off every single day I quit. I just quit. She wasn't happy at all!😂

I spent 2 months without a job (had savings though!) and I don't regret it. I maybe regret I hadn't left earlier.