House Sharing In My 30s

[HateSeafood]

Been doing it for two years to save a deposit for my own home, feels like I'll be doing it for the rest of my fucking miserable and depressing life. I'm too old and too introverted for this shit. I feel like a student. Just bouncing around from house to house, moving in with another stranger yet again this month, for the third time since I've been living like this. I can't (won't) go back to renting privately because it eats up so much of my earnings. I can't go back to my parents for various reasons. So this is my life. Pathetic.

It’s also v possible that you’lol meet someone within the next year and after a year or so of dating, you might like to buy a house together, or rent together, which wouldn’t be too much more than the price of renting a room. You just don’t know what the future’s going to bring really. I think you’re brilliant for renting a room and saving for your own house though, more people should think like you!

It's unfortunately a common thing these days, trying to save for a house is bloody difficult! I'm in my 30s and have quite a few friends in the same position, all live in or around London though. One of my best friends has an amazing job, top dog in her field yet she still lives like a student. She is pittied quite a lot by colleagues etc. She found a good house share, although all but one person have moved on (it's a 5 person house share), so she's had new random housemates quite often. The only person who is one of the original housemates is the person she is currently looking to buy with and is marrying! So yes sometimes it can work out.

I think you just have to keep in mind your end goal, we had to move back in with parents and go without a holiday for over 5 years, it was grim!! We have a house now and it was the only way we could have managed to save.

Glad game: you're funny and you've got friends (who are also skint; I think that helps). 4 years isn't really that far away and you really don't know what could happen in that time. Good luck, OP!

Well I took most of my stuff to the new house last night and the new landlord seems (seems, touch wood) much better than my current one, who has been a complete nightmare from day one. Irresponsible, inconsiderate and the most immature grown man I've ever met. Think Men Behaving Badly, only instead of Neil Morrissey making you piss yourself laughing instead you get a grade A cunt you just want to punch in the face.

One week to go and I'm onto the next chapter. One of my oldest friends who has her home and all boxes ticked marriage and kids etc was stunned when I admitted I was on the move again and said I never tell her anything anymore (she wanted to see me on the weekend I move so I had to confess). I told her the less people know about my life the better. I hide from people more these days, what with my life being such an embarrassment.

As a side note I'd also recommend deleting Facebook if it feels like everyone else is living a lifestyle resembling a magazine whilst yours belongs on a post it note (I know most of them are bullshitters).

Fuck me this is hard... but I am saving money. Thanks all of you x

" Living in a house that is way (way!) below my standards of living."

What does this mean?

Do you think you're better than the situation? Better than other people who share houses?

I have a friend who decided enough was enough, and now lives in a van that he converted in order to save money to buy a house. I don't think it's easy, he goes to the gym to shower, he has a portapotty that he has to empty now and again, and he often spends the night in a supermarket carpark. And he hasn't done a full winter yet, as he bunked down with friends during the worst of the weather. But he is saving money, and holidays are easy and cheap as he doesn't have to worry about accommodation (unless he goes further than mainland Europe, but he tends to just drive now).

The only thing is, he's now not sure if he wants to buy a house as he likes the freedom..

Order please - no I am nothing special and not better than anyone. I don't think much of myself at all thank you very much. But if I move into a house and the first thing I have to do is buy a duster because there are cobwebs in every corner of the house, if I have to spend ten minutes getting the window open to let some fresh air in because the lock is fucked and the landlord is too much of a twat to get it fixed or if I have to buy carbon monoxide alarms because I'm not convinced he keeps the boiler serviced regularly. None of those things are being a snob it's just being a normal and responsible adult for fucks sake!

www.liveinguardians.com/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIw7bDpp2F3QIVzZPtCh13mQH7EAAYAiAAEgJRmPD_BwE

I lived and worked in London when I was younger and was a property guardian! Basically people who had nice places and worked abroad a lot of the time or away and just wanted someone to look after it. Might be worth considering

Two days to go and I'm onto the next chapter whatever it may be...

@ElainaElephant is that not illegal?

OP, could you get there faster if you go for shared ownership or one of the government's help to buy schemes?

Do you think you're better than the situation? Better than other people who share houses?

FFS have you seen a shared house before? Nobody takes care of the communal bits.

OP, please don't 'think positive'. I have a friend who is stuck in a really shit situation because she always tries to accept bad things instead of changing them. I think you're completely justified in venting a bit!

OP don't go for shared ownership.

There are people who have been made homeless and lost their money as they couldn't afford the rent or service charge part on their property as the rents and service charges just kept increasing yearly for no reason.

I will never do part ownership, part rent, buy with a mate. Any of it. I want my own house, I want it to be 100% mine and I want to then say a big fuck you to anyone who has ever tried to screw me over and rip me off.

Bless you. How close are you to having your deposit? If less than 2 years I think I'd make it work for now (possibly ask your LL if your bedroom has possibility of being unfurnished to allow you to make it really lovely- buying furniture will also help for when you get your own place. If you're looking at a long time def look at a studio. Honestly, it's possibly the happiest I ever was living independently before I eventually managed to buy. Much preferred living out of one room than sharing. Even sharing with your best friend can be fraught. Less space for mental happiness so important. BUT if you do go for the studio get a top floor option so you don't get noise from above. Fingers crossed for you

It'll be at least three years I think. It's a pretty big house, just me and the guy who owns it. He can't stand living with more than one person either. We both work full time. We seem to get on okay. It could be worse the kitchen is a fucking shit tip why are men so vile

I have friends who have bought on a shared ownership basis just to get on the ladder and then scrimped and saved and got promoted to staircase up as soon as possible.

It might be a way of getting your own space sooner, that's all.

But to be honest, if you're in London I wouldn't be looking to buy anytime soon anyway. You don't know what Brexit is going to do to house prices. Keep saving away, and bide your time.

Thankfully nowhere near London 😊