To know what what to do... CAO

[helpconfused]

Has anyone here got a Child Arrangement Order whilst a restraining order against exP is in place? No contact with DS.

How did it go?

I'm not sure what to do for the best.

Looking for experiences.

Thanks in advance

anyone?

My SIL has a non molestation order against her ex-dp
He's not allowed contact with her or the kids

Have a child arrangement order in place but not a non molestation. What sort of advice are you looking for?x

I don't know to be honest.
I have a restraining order so he cannot contact me.
No arrangement for access to DS. He was told by Social Services to take it through family court to arrange as likely to be in a contact centre. He never has.
There was DV, DS was involved which is why SS have been in contact.
Weighing up the pros/cons of having a CAO.
Would I have to sit in court with him?
As far as I can tell I wouldn't need to go to mediation due to the above.
I don't want to open a door for access by initiating a CAO but then again I want something formal in place to say he resides with me.

You’d be opening a can of worms in my opinion and giving him a nudge to go for access.

You don’t need a residency order at the moment, if stay hush as long as possible. Wait until he makes a move.

Sit tight, he can apply to the court if he wants access. The longer he leaves it the worse it will look for him in court. It is not your responsibility, the restraining order is there to protect you with good reason.

You could go to court to ask for residence order. But tbh if he's not bothering you I wouldn't bother. Don't give him ideas. If he wants to see ds that bad he can take it to court himself.

And yes you would both have to be in court together.

Why do you want something formal to say he lives with you?

Just in case he took him from somewhere when I'm not there. Wouldn't it be harder to get him back if nothing was formalised? Not that I think he actually would. I'm just overthinking it aren't I

Where could he get him from? You can tell school not to release him to anyone but you. Is the dv registered with the police etc? Because if that did happen you call the police and they go get him back. But tbh if he's not bothered to go through court he's not going to take him.