To feel uncomfortable in new job because of this

[Spikypants]

I’ve recently started a new job with a very large organisation. It’s a step up with quite a lot of responsibility and I’m feeling a bit daunted and doing that ‘they’re going to find out soon that I’m actually really crap’ thing even though I have plenty of experience and know really that I can do the job.

What isn’t helping is that there are two people directly junior to me who have been there for years and who I’m almost certain - - from comments made by others and them - went for my job. Neither has been massively friendly to me and it’s making me feel enormous pressure as I feel they’re waiting for me to slip up and prove that they would have been better. It’s definitely eroding my confidence already.

Has anyone else ever been in this situation?

Yes, I was.

I spoke to my manager about it discretely (this was possibly because of a few factors and I know might not be for you) but the crux of it is, the hiring panel chose you because you’re more suitable. They would’ve been the easy choice but they chose YOU. It means they weren’t suitable and you are.

Fake it ‘til you make it, don’t be afraid of them, be nice and friendly and professional and show them why you’re there.

You’ll be great.

Sorry for the appalling grammar - I’ve not slept for a week thanks to a very grumpy baby

Yes, someone slightly junior applied internally for my job and tbh it seems like my direct boss wanted her to get it at the time. Her behaviour (she's been vile) and my performance since has show everyone that appointing her would have been a disaster and my boss now sees not appointing her as a lucky escape.

I had a similar situation many moons ago, but in the end the internal applicant got the job when my colleague resigned. The internal applicant wasn't right at the time for the mix of the team, but was right the second time around. These things will work themselves out hopefully.

I have, twice!

I think it's worth thinking how shit it must have been for them to have gone for a job they obviously thought they could do, then lose to an external candidate. BUT they should never take that out on you, and it's completely unacceptable to treat you badly or scrutinise you because of it. If you trust your manager perhaps mention it, but otherwise give it time. Any new job means catching your breath a little. But also trust your gut - if you don't feel comfortable asking these people for help then don't

Yes, one junior colleague was a total dick about it and made my life a living hell, she did also however fail to do her job (thinking it would make me look bad) so I could sack her, she was a bit thick. The other was frosty initially but got over it fairly quickly.

Same here. Nearly the whole team I managed and two other managers thought that the supervisor should have been promoted but instead I was brought in externally. I had to endure weeks of listening to "that's not how Sharon does it" or "Sharon is just amazing". Truth be told, she was awesome at her job but she was shit at managing and often worked herself into a heap. I found her crying in a cupboard after a few weeks which apparently was just normal. I played off her strengths, let her take ownership of the stuff she knew well and I made sure to learn from her as well as showing my strengths.

How long have you been there?

Try googling 'imposter syndrome', it's a lot more common than you might expect.

Sorry but you need to knock this on the head dh just left a job because the manager they had filling in went for the job didn’t get it and made dh life he’ll small things like giving him the wrong email he didn’t receive email for 5 weeks then bigger things like re doing the rota when he was away made his life he’ll and wouldn’t step down claimed it was discrimination it was awful she applied for the job again when dh left and still didn’t fucking get it

There’s an excellent TED talk about imposter syndrome. It’s excellent but I can’t remember the title. Maybe someone else remembers which one and can direct op to it.

You're not crap; you beat internal candidates, so you must be good. But you will have workplace specific stuff you won't know. This is normal, so you have to go in and ask that stuff as the new person with the attitude of this is fine and normal. It's okay. It's their job to fill you in on this stuff.

Thanks everyone.

I’ve been there a few weeks now. I guess it’s just hard too as I left a much smaller organisation to come here. Career wise there was no scope to progress in my last job but it was a really friendly small team and here I just feel unwelcome.

I will watch the TED talk!