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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be fed up neighbours can't be arsed watching their own kids

52 replies

backstreetboysareback · 21/08/2018 20:13

Have nc for this as it is very outing
Honestly loosing the will to live with my neighbour. Don't know what to do or if I can do anything as she is very confrontational with people who disagree with her views but need advice.

Mother Teresa / earth goddess on Facebook. Married, SAHP, 3 dc. Age 2 5 & 6

Dad appears stoned most of the time and drinks in the day although they have a nice house they own and he works and they appear quite middle class.

Mum makes out on Facebook the kids are constantly clinging off her and she is household goddess. Realistically one is in nursery the other two in school and she spends her day trolling unicef and the likes about how vaccinations are for idiots and anybody who isn't a vegan (she isn't either) must hate animals. "If you disagree with me unfriend me fuck off bye" and all that shit.

Anyway they do nothing with the kids. Don't take them anywhere or do anything with them. Don't even supervise them in the house. Every single day of the holidays they have been all in the road playing from 7am until sometimes gone 10pm while mums front door is closed and she's nowhere to bbe seen but sat posting on Facebook.

Apart from the noise which on my days off work and it being too hot to sleep to with windows shut I'm genuinely worried for the safety of these kids

So far we have caught the 5 year old standing dancing on top of an 8 ft brick wall, no adult to be seen

5yo yesterday riding a bike zig zagging across the road with no helmet

2yo and 5yo constantly hang out of windows shouting

This morning they were out at 7 again shouting in the street

Now they are still out running in and out of the road without looking and infront of cars laughing. Mum and dad might as well have gone out they are never ever watching them.

Our street is a very busy cut through and they live on the corner of another side road.

At the bottom of our street is a road with huge houses on, some of which house kids that have been in care, vulnerable people and people that have previously been in prison including pedophiles, this is knowledgeable to everybody in the street. Our street is the route they would take to get into town as shops are at the other end. Nobody in their right mind would let their kids play out all day here let alone with no sense or parental guidance.
Another neighbour that lives opposite said children are an old couple that are nudists. I've never seen the woman naked but we think the man is losing his awareness as on multiple occasions this year he has been caught by neighbours in the street and in his bag window bollock naked and reported to the police for his own safety so they can check he is ok.

I'm tired of wondering why the parents can't be arsed to watch these kids but can be bothered to sit with a beer on Facebook judging everybody else's attempts at life.

There's probably nothing I can do about it but have a rant. Their kids are in the same school as mine so I have to see them everyday. Their kids have no manners, Road sense, they hit and kick and shout and swear, the youngest doesn't even seem to be able to communicate yet on Facebook she's a middle class stay at home vegan spiritual goddess woman who posts life advice posts constantly

OP posts:
backstreetboysareback · 21/08/2018 20:48

@SocialPiranha I've never said a word to her or about her to anybody else I am just at my wits end watching it all. Literally just venting.

OP posts:
SocialPiranha · 21/08/2018 20:51

Vent to the police. The only reason her children haven’t been killed or injured so far is pure luck by the sound of it.

Maelstrop · 21/08/2018 21:03

She said she didn't have time as she was cooking from scratch with a two yo hanging off her and the others demanding juice, and had washing to do afterwards. I checked. The kids were outside running wild unsupervised. Again

@backstreetboysareback At which point, I would have taken a photo of her kids running wild and posted it under her stupid comment with a very passive aggressive comment re ‘But all three have been running wild in the street all holiday and still are. I can see you at your laptop.’ But then I’m a bitch.

ofcoursehesthefuckingfarmer · 21/08/2018 21:12

Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility. Report to Social services asap.

backstreetboysareback · 21/08/2018 21:20

Will they take it seriously if I know the Mum is there in the house

OP posts:
Racecardriver · 21/08/2018 21:30

It sounds like she has mental health problems. A visit from SS is probably in order.

BlancheM · 21/08/2018 21:33

Race what makes you think that?

backstreetboysareback · 21/08/2018 21:56

Have reported the problems with the children being unsupervised to ss. Didn't feel nice doing that.
I think I was kind of hoping she would see my post realise it was about her and not let the kids out alone again

OP posts:
BE18mum · 21/08/2018 22:08

I’m not sure ignoring your kidsu

BE18mum · 21/08/2018 22:09

Oops! DD pressed post!

But meant to say that it’s a bit hasty diagnosing a mental health issue because they are obsessed with Facebook and ignore their kids.

BlancheM · 21/08/2018 22:43

In that case, make a fb post, backstreet

queenjosephine · 21/08/2018 22:52

This is shocking.
Please report to social services or NSPCC.
You never know, they might already have had additional info regarding this ongoing neglect.
Poor kids.

justilou1 · 22/08/2018 02:07

How about posting on Facebook? Everyone in the street knows how long you are on Facebook while your kids are trying to kill themselves on the street and we are debating whether the police or SS are the best way to proceed?

SilverDoe · 22/08/2018 02:39

How can you leave a two year old out in the street all day?? Even besides all the stomach churning safety concerns, mine would be so lonely :(

I hope this isn’t real but have no reason to think it isn’t. OP please call someone, this is so sad. Why some people bother to have children is beyond me.

HavingALittleBabyToolshed · 22/08/2018 03:02

A two year old in the street unsupervised for 12 hours? A baby? I’d phone the police, I genuinely would.

jubbablub · 22/08/2018 05:55

I have neighbours who are similarly awful. If you think a child is in danger, call 999. Three 999 calls in 6 months means plans put into place by SS in most areas.

rwalker · 22/08/2018 06:23

send here private message on fb saying you saw near miss with kids and car yesterday keep it brief

Goth237 · 22/08/2018 07:03

I would absolutely NOT post any of it on FaceBook. It will only serve to cause anger and may result in a confrontation. You did the right thing by calling SS but don't antagonise her by posting something passive aggressive on FB in the hopes that she'll see it. She may retaliate in a bad way and you still have to live next to her.

CoraPirbright · 22/08/2018 07:23

Well done OP. I am sure it felt horrible to do but hopefully it will give both parents a wake up call.

valenciaev · 22/08/2018 07:29

Well done OP

backstreetboysareback · 22/08/2018 10:03

@Goth237 that's what worries me about sending her a message or anything. She seems to be overly confrontational and for the sake of my own children too I don't want that.
I've reported to ss. All close neighbours seem to be aware but don't do anything. I've let them into our house on occasion to play in the past but they dont understand the word no and all they do is hit and kick and scream it's hard. Also not a solution as I work ft.
Other neighbours are aware. One lady who has a 1yo stood on the front watching them with her baby asleep in a pram for hours the other day. Everybody tells them to go inside, get off the road etc but parents are nowhere to be seen.

OP posts:
DULLDull · 22/08/2018 10:15

Well done for calling SS. I would also call the police the next time the children are out there. Maybe speak to the local community team so they are aware.

ohfourfoxache · 22/08/2018 10:19

You need to keep reporting to SS and police

PoisonousSmurf · 22/08/2018 15:55

We had a family like that down the road a few years ago. The four year old was a real live wire and would annoy all the street and kept knocking on doors for food.
She also had a habit of sneaking into homes if the door was open. She did it to our NDN when they were leaving for holiday.
She got locked in the house!
The parents still didn't got looking until dark.
It gave them a real wake up call, Another NDN had a key.
As the child and her younger brothers grew up, they turned even worse as teenagers.
I used to get anxiety going back to my own home as they would pelt people's cars as they drove past the estate.
No one dared tell them off as the parents would be extremely threatening.
Long story short, The finally grew up and moved away, but that (4 year old), had a baby at 15!
And the cycle continues...

backstreetboysareback · 22/08/2018 19:44

@PoisonousSmurf it's horrible isn't it. The 5yo a few weeks ago was banging on my door at 9pm with an older girl (primary school age playing out in the street) the girl looked embarrassed. 5yo demanding to come in and play with my kids. I stepped outside the front door and told him no my kids are in bed, but he kept pushing and kicking my door and shouting no trying to get past me trying to get in my house. Parents unaware, it was the young girl that lead him away eventually

OP posts:
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