To start letting my child use deodorant, even though they don't need it?

[Porthcurnoqueen]

I feel a bit out my my depth with this growing up malarkey.

My child has just turned 10 and keeps asking to get some deodorant.

The whole class is going on a residential this Autumn and apparently their teacher told them they'll need deodorant as they'll all stink after a busy day.

My dc doesn't need deodorant yet, they haven't hit puberty, don't smell, even after doing sports, don't really even sweat very much.

We had a bit of a stand off in Boots today with dc begging for deodorant and me saying they don't need it yet.

What about salt crystal anti perspirant? Not harmful and a good habit. If expensive.

Yes maybe something natural?

Dc has daily showers but can be a bit lazy about using soap, so although there deodorant is a good habit I'd rather they got into a good habit of washing thoroughly first.

Buy the bloody deodorant ffs!

Why can't he have deodorant? How odd.

The teacher needs to be given words of advice.
Telling children they need to use deodorant is outside there remit.
You should inform the head teacher regarding thie inappropriate instruction and get it rescinded now.

Why wouldn't you let them? If everyone else is using it in their class, it seems mean to make them the odd one out for the sake of a couple of quid.

I think encourage it while they’re keen. Even if they don’t need it yet they will do in the near future so there’s no harm in it really is there.

Would something like impulse be better for a young girl?

Get a sensitive roll on. Safer on her skin and the environment.

It won’t be long til they need it tbh so I think it’s a good habit to get into

Because they don't actually need deodorant. Deodorant is to stop people having BO is it not?

It's not the cost but to me it's a bit like buying razors to shave when you've got no facial hair, or sanitary towels when you've got no periods just to pretend with.

For goodness sake, they just want to fit in with their friends who are further ahead in development.

It’s not about using it, it’s about having it. It’s a teasing prevention mechanism.

Apart from which as the mother of two ten year olds I can assure you they go from not needing deodorant to needing it desperately overnight.

Re the showering thing, why are you using this as an opportunity to apply some psychology to the problem?

“As you are now old enough for deodorant it’s very important that you shower properly every day”.

My 8 year old, nearly 9, has a roll on. She begged me to have some, so I got her some on the understanding that she just uses it after PE, as some of the other girls take it in. I don't see the harm. It's not like she's asking to wear a thong or red lipstick to school or something. Kids just like to feel a bit grown up and imo you have to pick your battles and say yes to some things, whether they 'need' them or not.

Let the poor kid fit, just get him a gentle one.

Tell him he'll still smell unless he used soap so it might be beneficial in the long run.

I agree. I had this battle with my eldest. With the next 3 i just said yes yes, sure, you can have deodorant, where it got added to the pile in the bathroom and used for about 2 days until someone that actually needed it came along. Don't sweat the small stuff!

By the way, I DID pick up a sensitive deodorant for dc and the body wash of their choice.

Just seems a shame to start using it unnecessarily but perhaps I'm being silly.

My mum packed sanitary towels for me when I went on a residential when I was ten, just in case. Didn't use them till I was 13. What's wrong with playing with them before you need them. Gets you used to it. Isn't that the point of play. Also, he wants to fit in with his friends.

Sorry, just realised you didn't say whether you have a DD or DS, reasonably irrelevant in this case.

I would do, yes. I remember going on a residential trip when I was that age and all of the girls compared deodorant in the dorm. It was a weird thing to do looking back but we felt so grown up .

The teacher needs to be given words of advice.
Telling children they need to use deodorant is outside there remit

Vicky I can only assume you haven’t recently been in a classroom full of ten year olds after PE/a warm playtime recently. . It can be extremely unpleasant and smelly.

Teachers recommend deodorant for everyone’s comfort.

As for sanitary towels Porth making sure your DD is comfortable with, has easy access to and knows what to do with a sanitary towel before she needs them seems like good parenting to me...

Just buy one of the ones with no aluminium (Sanex do one). They are completely ineffective but look like normal deodorant.

However, at 10 I think it's reasonable to start using something. I mean, you don't really want them to start needing it before they start using it, and you then have to gently tell them they smell.

Get some deodorant. It's better to get into the habit now when it's not required than have the battle when it is.

If it makes her feel fresher and more confident, why the heck not? I can't believe you're making such an issue out of a bit of roll on.

At 10 they will want to fit in on the residential. Could you not just buy the deodorant?!
It seems awfully mean not to.

I remember asking for a bra when I was staying over with older cousins and my mum said I didn't need it but bought me one anyway. It was all about the bra straps and I loved it.

If your DC is a girl who hasn't started periods yet there's no harm in packing some sanitary towels, period could start any time and it's a good habit to carry something in their schoolbag, especially as periods can be unpredictable.

sanitary towels when you've got no periods just to pretend with

Its exactly like that and I dont see the problem with doing that, means they have them already for when they need them and can get comfortable with the idea of having to use them. I bought dd deodorant and sanitary towels when she asked in Y5, shes now started puberty at 11 and has not been damged by having these things before she needed them.