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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be getting sick of my next door neighbour?

272 replies

lineylane · 21/08/2018 13:34

NDN moved in 6 weeks ago. We have only been here approx 4 months ourselves.

We have three dogs- 2 Rottweilers (honestly the softest, most dopey dogs you will meet- all the children on our close adore them and will come up and pet them etc) and a very old, feeble staffie who couldn’t even catch a fly if he tried.

Rotties are walked three times a day- once by DH in the morning, dog walker in the afternoon and me of an evening. Our staffie cannot walk long distances so either both me and DH go on a walk and one of us turns back with our staffie or he doesn’t come out with us.

Aside from this, they get let out in the garden for a play/pee a couple times a day by me (work from home) fully supervised as it’s my time to enjoy a smoke and a quick brew.

Approx a week after NDN moved in, we got a knock on the door at 8am- hysterically screaming at us that are “dogs are out of control” and are dangerous and may attack their DC if they are playing in the garden.

I insisted they were all incredibly friendly, well trained and while like rough and tumble with each other- are impeccably behaved around humans and suggested NDN brought her DC round to meet them which made her even more hysterical. I ended up shutting the door in her face, resulting her banging on the door for 20 minutes screaming through the letterbox while I was on a conference call. I will admit, I ended up losing my temper and ended up opening the front room window and asking her what the fuck she thought she was doing and to get off my property. Looked very taken aback and sulked off.

Anyway- two weeks ago, NDN brought two kittens. Got a knock on the door saying we would have to either keep the dogs indoors, or get rid “because no doubt our dogs would choose to savage them”. Of course no dog can be 100% trusted, but I can say with 95% confidence that if said cats came in the garden the dogs would come to me if recalled.

This wasn’t good enough for said neighbour. I suggested my DH put barbed wire on top of our shared fence so cats wouldn’t be able to jump over. Apparently we are now cruel to animals Hmm

Anyway things have come to a head this morning. Another neighbour has come and knocked to say NDN has started a petition for us to get rid of our dogs Hmm because they are all of “dangerous breed”. Most people have told her to fuck off, one or two others have sided with her.

I’m close to ringing the police for harassment.

AIBU?

OP posts:
OneStepSideways · 21/08/2018 14:36

How high and strong is your fence? Could the dogs jump it if they wanted to?

If the fence is high and secure, your neighbour is being ridiculous. If it isn't she has a point, Rottweilers are big powerful dogs and have a reputation (true or not) for being unpredictable around small children. I would be angry if a neighbour's big dogs could escape the garden!

BrynhildurWhitemane · 21/08/2018 14:37

I would contact my local PCSO and discuss this from a harassment/antisocial behaviour angle. They will probably go and speak to her, pointing out that your dogs are perfectly legal and under control and warning her to leave you alone. That may well be enough but if not it’s all on record with PCSO and the police can then escalate the complaint.

I agree with this. Given her behaviour in screaming through the letter box, get your side in first.

I'd imagine the one or two people who sided with her will be not so immediate neighbours who haven't had much to do with your dogs and who imagine what their behaviour might be just because of the breed.

SabineUndine · 21/08/2018 14:38

I’m a cat person and even I think she’s being unreasonable. If she perceives your dogs as a threat WTF did she get two kittens?

HannahHut · 21/08/2018 14:41

Do not do as pp suggested and say you will take them to obedience class. This is like admitting they're badly behaved!

Log with police and ask for their advice. If there is a local pcso ask them for their advice and maybe to speak with the neighbours.

I'd rather live nextdoor to dogs than cats. Dogs bark and are usually hushed, cats shit in your garden!

Glymou · 21/08/2018 14:41

It's her responsibility to cat proof her own garden (or there are companies who specialise in providing this). If your dogs are safely contained in your garden, and cannot escape into neighbouring gardens, then you have done your part.

Spudlet · 21/08/2018 14:42

You don't know what kind of story she's spun to the neighbours who have signed her petition - she could have made up all sorts of lurid tales about vicious snapping barking hounds, and if it happens to confirm people's existing prejudices about dogs, they'll sign up. So I wouldn't take that as proof of a problem.

I'd be looking to report this op, get some advice from the professionals and get it onto the radar as well, before she starts making false accusations. She sounds like a loon, screaming through a letterbox for twenty minutes! Who does that?!

KurriKurri · 21/08/2018 14:43

I have a dog, and my next door neighbour has a cat. I take the attitude that if the cat comes into my garden (which it does - to shit in my flowers beds) then it takes its chances if my dog happens to be out there. It's chances are pretty good because my dog is completely soppy and couldn't catch a cat if it sat on his paws.
I'm actually more worried about the fact that the cat (which is practically feral) would hurt my dog -it has tried to scratch his face before now.

I would ring the police and say she is harrassing you. I'd inform her you are getting CCTV so you will know if she is deliberately baiting your dogs. She sounds totally bonkers.

Tippexy · 21/08/2018 14:44

I'm sorry, but no Rottweiler on this planet is one of "the softest, most dopey dogs you will meet." If by your own admission there is a one in 20 chance that your dogs will go after the cats, then I am on your neighbour's side...

ApolloandDaphne · 21/08/2018 14:46

Tippexy. How on earth can you say that without having ever met OPs dogs? Rotties are lovely dogs but are much maligned.

Original poster
lineylane · 21/08/2018 14:48

Dog walker has just come back from a walk. Apparently NDN was taking photos out of her bedroom window Hmm

OP posts:
Glymou · 21/08/2018 14:48

If the neighbour is going to let her cats roam beyind her own garden then she'll have more than the OP's dogs to worry about.

Original poster
lineylane · 21/08/2018 14:49

Tippexy- statically, you are more likely to be sexually assaulted by your own family or friends then you are to be savaged by a dog.

I’m guessing this must mean you live in your own little sterile bubble?

OP posts:
Tara336 · 21/08/2018 14:51

I’ve had cats and dogs and have never had a problem. Neighbours cats soon worked out there was a dog in the garden and always did a detour. He’s always been fine with our cats. She’s being a drama queen, ignore

OctaviaOctober · 21/08/2018 14:52

I bet she bought the kittens because she thought it would make you get rid of the dogs.

Of course the cats may be in danger if they go in your garden, but I lived next door to similar dogs for years. Cats just avoided that garden (and came to mine).

It might be worth calling 101. Stress her first visit when she was banging on your door for 20 minutes. Get your side in first before her dd gets a random injury and she tries to blame it on your dogs.

nocoriander · 21/08/2018 14:52

I'm sorry, but no Rottweiler on this planet is one of "the softest, most dopey dogs you will meet."

Well, I can't claim to have met them all but the few Rottweilers I have met have been gentle and well-cared for by good owners.

My dog isn't a Rottweiler, but she would chase a cat in her garden. Fortunately a cat can get out of the way very quickly. I would be distraught if anything happened but in the end my dog is in my own garden, from which she can't get out.

As long as you have proper high secure fencing, I can't see that the neighbour has any grounds for complaint.

Some people would sign a petition like that because they don't like or are afraid of all dogs, and others because they think Rottweilers are automatically dangerous. It doesn't mean necessarily that there's another side to this story as some are claiming.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 21/08/2018 14:52

I’m guessing this must mean you live in your own little sterile bubble?

A pp just didn't agree with you. No need for this sort of thing imo ^

YeTalkShiteHen · 21/08/2018 14:54

I'm sorry, but no Rottweiler on this planet is one of "the softest, most dopey dogs you will meet

Rubbish. There were 5 on the street I grew up on. Only one dog in the entire street left a child in hospital, or indeed showed any aggression at all.

It was a collie, the rotties were all fine.

BrynhildurWhitemane · 21/08/2018 14:54

OP, if she's starting to take photos, you need to start a diary now, and get onto the PCSO pronto, before she can start spinning things.

hollyjollychristmas · 21/08/2018 14:55

What an absolute fruit loop. She sounds insane I would definitely keep a watch on your dogs whilst they are in the garden as wouldn't trust her not to throw some poisoned food over or something.

I don't think police will help too much at the moment but I would definitely look at getting a harassment style letter (your local council should have templates for these) and also try to follow up with the landlord if she is indeed renting, they might not even be aware of the kittens

Twombly · 21/08/2018 14:56

Well, she's out of order in her behaviour, but it seems pretty clear to me that she's reacting from a place of fear. I have some sympathy because I'm not much of a fan of dogs either, and while yours are apparently well trained and socialised, she's not to know that, or know how to tell the difference. She also seems to be confused about what constitutes a dangerous breed, can't tell the difference between a staffie and an American pit bull, etc. I think in the long term, your best bet is to educate her, so that she understands your lack of concern is justified not cavalier. I think I would print off some stuff from the internet about breeds, training, how people who are nervous of dogs should/shouldn't behave around them, etc, and take it round to her. Ideally resist the urge to shout through her letter box at the same time. Grin But if she persists with the abuse, then yes, police advice, because she may escalate and your dogs may be at risk.

onetimeposter · 21/08/2018 14:59

TBH I think neighbours selling properties should have to disclose large pets next door similarly to disagreements. I'd be gutted to find out my neighbours had rottweilers and a staffie, or 100 cats.
All cuntish dog owners of horrible dogs say 'oh but he's friendly'....so that may not have been much reassurance. If I've had one person with off lead dogs running up to my toddler say 'oh she's harmless' I've had a million. Don't give a shit what you think, my kid is more important than an animal. Keep it on a lead.
If the fence is 6ft then I'd just about cope so long as there was minimal noise, but any kind of approaching of my kids by your dogs would be too much, say if the fence was 4ft or something.
That being said I think barbed wire is an excellent idea and would advocate that as an option. They shouldn't have got the cats imo, and kittens should be indoor pets.
I think dog owners always think that other people are as in love with dogs as they and they need to realise that they aren't-to me they are vermin. Also, whilst they go for 'a wee' does your garden have lots of poo to clean up, as that is also a hazard, even for next door (more flies, etc).
If other neighbours have sided with her, it's because your dogs are the problem. Doesn't matter who was there first, children trump pets, end of.

SendYouUpInFlames · 21/08/2018 14:59

If they're so dangerous she'll learn her cats not to jump over to your garden.

Cats aren't thick. They won't jump into the garden with 3 huge "wild dogs" running around.

The cats probably won't come into your garden. Your NDN is being a CF and very melodramatic. You did right to tell her to fuck off. And keep doing so in future.

AnElderlyLadyOfMediumHeight · 21/08/2018 15:01

I dislike and distrust dogs and tbh I wouldn't have moved next to you (presuming they knew you were there when they bought/rented the house). I certainly wouldn't scream through your letterbox or get up petitions. But I think having dogs of the kind you have, some wariness from those around you does (should) come with the territory.

AnElderlyLadyOfMediumHeight · 21/08/2018 15:02

^What onetimeposter said.

Celebelly · 21/08/2018 15:04

Rotties are lovely dogs. I have a real soft spot for them. Bottom line is she has no leg to stand on. Your dogs are under control on your own property, they are not a banned breed, and are posing no risk to her. How they play together in your own garden is nothing to do with her. I'd just let her waste her time and report her for the shouting through letterbox and harassment. No one is going to waste valuable time following up on her claims when there's no evidence of nuisance.