AIBU to be terrified

[Amadeus5]

Hi all,

I’ve been lurking for years and created an account for some advice.

I’ve been a single parent for 6 years. I dated a few people but never really met anybody I felt like I could see a future with. Recently I met somebody through work. He is wonderful and I can’t describe it other than it feels like he is what I’ve been missing all along. I feel like I’ve known him forever and we have shared everything and it’s really lovely. I’m aware that our short time together is not a true reflection of who he or I am and things may change. However i’m a firm believer of “when you know, you know” and I truly do feel he is the one for me. He also feels the same.

So here’s my AIBU. We have been together only 4 months (yes I know) and I have just found out i’m pregnant. I was taking all possible precautions and didn’t miss my pill once, but yet here we are. I have told him and he’s over the moon, not something I was expecting. I on the other hand have massive reservations. I’m terrified. I don’t wish to terminate this pregnancy and neither does he. However i’m so scared that this will not work and i’ll be a single parent again, I know how hard it is. I’m worried of introducing him to my children and upsetting their lives and I just can’t stop overthinking everything. Does anybody have any success stories? Know anybody in a similar situation? Please, please ease my mind.

I’m aware i’m stupid, please don’t jump on to tell me so. Thank you all in advance for taking the time to read.

Congratulations! No experience of this myself, but sounds like you have found a lovely guy. Friends of mine got engaged after only two weeks (!) and are still happily together with 4 DC many years later so it is definitely possible! Good luck and fingers crossed for a happy, healthy pregnancy and a great future together.

You aren’t stupid - you’re allowed to have sex with your lovely boyfriend, and contraception sometimes fails despite best intentions!

I think all you can do is cross your bridges as they come to them. Your partner sounds lovely and like they would be decent even if you did split up. His reaction so far is a good sign.

I knew the day I met my DH that I would marry him - sometimes you do just know.

It's happened and he is good with it. Worrying about what might happen is pointless unless you have definite red flags etc. Go day by day & enjoy your new relationship & pregnancy.

We didn't get pregnant as quickly as you, but I met my husband through work, felt very much the same as you, moved into his house within weeks and here we are seven years later, married, with a child.

It's natural to be scared when things move so quickly and you develop intense feelings so soon, but it very can work.

Firstly congratulations .

At least he is fine with it and hasn’t freaked out or done a runner. It won’t be easy but if you work hard at it, it could blossom into something beautiful and long lasting. If you do end up separating, it won’t be the end of the world and since you’re already a pro at single parenting it won’t come as such a shock.

Congratulations! I just "knew" when DH and I met. After a week we knew we wanted to be together. We've now been together 17 years and married for 13 and have a child.

Sometimes these things happen for a reason
I wish you every happiness