To knock the door?

[NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking]

There’s a couple near me who had a baby in the last year. This baby cries and cries..

I don’t know the couple other than to say hello to and pass idle pleasantries with, but I do know how destroying it is to have a baby that will just not stop crying ever.

WIBU to knock the door with maybe a small bunch of flowers, just to say ‘chin up - it gets better’, maybe offer to push the kid round the block in a pram for ten minutes? (I know this will probably be declined.. she doesn’t really know me after all!).

Or would that be overstepping the mark? I don’t want to insinuate she’s not coping or anything.

I’m still undecided, but would like views.. cheers 😊

I'd love it, even invite you in for a coffee.

I know that you mean well, but I would just think that you were implying that I was an awful mother. It would seem that my baby was disturbing you and then I would feel worse than I already did. That probably says more about me than you though.

If you knew her it might be different.

You could introduce yourself and offer any help in a general manner. She's not likely to hand the baby off to a practical stranger though.

I think it's sweet - instead of flowers why not bring a cake or meal and say "I remember what's it like having a small baby". My downstairs neighbour did something like that when I had DC1 and I thought it was lovely. I'd have probably been embarrassed though if she'd intimated she was doing it because my baby cries constantly!.

I might just look for opportunities to say hello and engage in conversation more... hopefully leading to a more natural offer of help?

I know when I was at home with small babies I would have both mortified and grateful if a neighbour had done this, but maybe more mortified? I don’t know 😬

I’ll tread carefully and see how it goes.

The other thing is, it’s not a new baby.. so to approach now would be slightly more awkward than if I had immediately. I can’t pass it off as ‘congratulations’ or similar now..

I think you're lovely for thinking of this. I wish I'd had a neighbour like you when DS was a baby....

Are you my neighbour?? 😂 I’ve had a morning from hell with 11mo DS. I’ve not even brushed my hair and teeth yet 😩😬 If someone bought me some cake today I’d be over the moon. Seriously though I think this is actually really nice, I personally wouldn’t take offence it’d be nice to talk to someone who’s been there but other people are different so I can see why your not sure

I actually think if someone did this to me I would be really embarrassed and take it as them saying I'm struggling. I'd rather someone tried to talk to me in the street and just be kind that way rather than knock on my door and give me flowers regardless of how well meaning the gesture.

Your intentions are lovely.

I had never seen or come F2F with our NDN and last week he took a parcel in for us, when he brought it round for us he simply asked “how are you getting on?” which bypassed the whole congratulations thing and made me feel like he gave a toss and didnt have an agenda! So you could try that?

I think it's a lovely thing to do, it's up to them how they take it but as long as you make your intentions clear, I think they'll love it