I'm shamelessly posting here for traffic. I don't know what to do and I'm tearing my hair out.
We have a son who will soon be three. We moved house almost two weeks ago. Apart from the first few night, which were fine, bed time has become hell and both DS and I usually end up crying, shouting and completely drained by it.
DS avoids sleep at all costs. He brushes his teeth etc fine but as soon as we get to his bedroom he starts flailing around and laughing maniacally. We sometimes get as far as coaxing him into bed with a story, or even laying down and singing his usual bedtime song. Then he stars rearranging his covers, flinging himself around on the bed, throwing his pillow. No amount of talking him out of it or distraction helps. It's gone as far as him headbutting me in the nose and throwing books at me.
We've tried just walking out of his room and telling him we'll come back when he's ready to go to sleep. He either wails that there's no one in his room with him, or hurls all his toys down the stairs, starting with the soft ones and getting bigger and heavier, until the other night he managed to pull out a fairly big wooden block that props up his toy shelves and hurled it down stairs hitting the dog on the head.
I'm completely at the end of my tether. I am so patient and calm with him for such a long time, but inevitably I end up losing my shit and shouting at him, and then immediately feel awful for it and sorry for him and the whole horrible cycle starts again. I'm in tears most nights. I now genuinely dread evenings. We went upstairs to bed tonight at 7 and now at ten to nine he's finally exhausted himself and given in.
Prior to moving his bedtime routine was good and he usually went to sleep quite quickly and slept all night. This was hard won. Since he was a baby he has fought sleep at all costs. At 4 or 5 months old he would twitch or shake a finger, a foot, his head, anything to keep himself awake. We never did controlled crying but it did take a lot of work and patience to get into a good habit.
It must be the move that's done it. Maybe he's anxious about his new surroundings. We did all the things we read we were supposed to. Talked about his lovely new bedroom, got him involved in choosing things for it. Got it mostly set up before we actually moved all our stuff in so he could see it and new what it looked like, you name it.
We've just moved house, which is stressful enough. I've not long started a new job which demands a lot of personal emotional energy and is quite high pressure. I haven't had much time off over the move. I'm completely exhausted. I've just finished a long spell of therapy with a Clinical Psychologist for PTSD. My DH is working weekends to make some extra cash. There's no let up.
I know he's two and it's not his fault and he's unsettled etc. But I am all out of ideas and barely keeping my grip on anything.
Sorry for the ramble. Please, I'm not usually a fan of parenting advice but I will take anything right now.