I have rapid cycling bipolar, as well as BPD. I’ve been at home since 2014 after crashing and burning, and I’ve never really recovered, huge depressions and bouts of mania since. In the years before that I’ve lost more jobs than most people have had, the longest I’ve ever managed to stay in a job is 18months.
I get Support group esa, which is around £400pm. I’ve now been stable for a good few months , by which I mean I haven’t had any periods of not being able to leave the house and haven’t been to hospital. I’m starting to think about doing some ‘permitted work’, they say I can work up to 16hrs and earn up to £125 without losing esa.
However, having done a bit of online research it seems that applying to do permitted work will automatically trigger a reassessment. And that lots of people have then lost ESA based on being able to do a bit of work. I have no idea whether I’ll float or sink doing some work, and if I lose esa based on being able to do a few hours it will make a huge dent in our finances as I’ll then potentially have no job either.
I feel trapped in a stupid situation where I’d love to test the water (and potentially come off esa) but risk being cut off completely. Also, I have no idea what sort of work I’d even be looking for, I can’t go back to sales or childcare.
Should I just forget the idea? It seems so backwards that trying to get back into the workforce comes with such a risk.