Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

AIBU to think my daughter is not a whimp

47 replies

Cath2907 · 15/08/2018 10:17

DD is having a sleep over with her friend. She was dropped off yesterday and slept ok but is tearful this morning and needs picking up. I am working, DH is not so have asked him to go collect her. He is disappointed at not getting a day free and has huffed off muttering about DD being "such a wimp". She is 7. AIBU in thinking this is not wimpy - it is normal for a 7 year old to sometimes find being away from home tough. she has slept over at family houses before but this is the first non-family sleep over.

OP posts:

RainySeptember · 15/08/2018 11:30

Perfectly normal for a 7yo to want to come home.

Perfectly normal for a parent to be disappointed that an expected day off has been cancelled at short notice.

BertrandRussell · 15/08/2018 11:32

I've had to step in as my 17 year old's roadie on Sunday, and I am really disappointed-I had plans.
(And before anyone says-no of course I don't have to step in-I could just tell him and the others to cancel the gig!)

Deadringer · 15/08/2018 11:37

10 is the minimum age for sleepovers in our house, and they usually end about midday. He is not unreasonable to be a bit put out but at 7 he should have been prepared to pick her early, possibly even in the middle of the night. I think he needs to grow up a bit.

3stonedown · 15/08/2018 11:42

Well I must be a wimp because at 26 years old I want to come home early in the morning if I stay anywhere that isn't home...

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 15/08/2018 11:49

I always gave my kids a get out clause for sleepovers. 7 is young and if it’s her first non family one I think she’s probably had enough, they hardly sleep anyway!
Staying the night then all of the next day is too much.
I once picked my youngest up from one as she was really upset, turns out the hostess had locked her in the bathroom and didn’t let her out for an hour!?

RomanyRoots · 15/08/2018 12:00

Great father, not.
My dd had several friends who used to sleep over at different ages, none of them would have managed it at this age and believe me they weren't wimps.
In fact they were quite feisty girls, but managing a sleepover at this age can be tough.
Tell her well done for trying, and try again when a bit older.
I think she was brave, some won't even try.

Ignoramusgiganticus · 15/08/2018 12:04

It's ok if he is just expressing his disappointment - as long as he doesn't do it in front of her.

pog100 · 15/08/2018 12:13

Was he expected some privacy for sex, maybe?

EdisonLightBulb · 15/08/2018 12:42

I can still remember sleeping over for the first time at my new high school friend's house about 6 streets away age 11.

I begged and begged her mother to ring mine and let them collect me at midnight, and I wet the bed as well.

I hadn't wet the bed at night since I was about 4.

I have no idea why I was like that, I slept at her house dozens of times over the next 5 years without issue.

SoupDragon · 15/08/2018 12:45

Was he expected some privacy for sex, maybe?

You think he’s having an affair??

MirriVan · 15/08/2018 12:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PolkaHots · 15/08/2018 12:59

I think it’s odd to have a sleepover to last all the next day, especially of it’s her first.

RiverTam · 15/08/2018 13:00

He may well be rightly disappointed but I think you (plural) were being ludicrously optimistic if you expected your DD to last much beyond 9am! And very unfair on the hosting family as well.

PotteringAlong · 15/08/2018 13:01

He’s allowed to vent to you; if I thought I’d got a child free day and then all of a sudden I hadn’t i would be pissed off and disappointed too. As long as he’s not telling her that

apriljune12 · 15/08/2018 13:03

I think it’s bonkers to either host or allow a sleepover for kids of 7!

Our youngest age was 11..

PuntCuffin · 15/08/2018 13:17

I think it’s bonkers to either host or allow a sleepover for kids of 7!

My two started having occasional sleepovers from age 5. By 8, both DS had either hosted or been to sleepover birthday parties. They have both loved it. Never had to collect either early, or take a friend home early. It depends on the child/ren, some are happy with it earlier than others, setting an arbitrary minimum is far more 'bonkers'.

lastqueenofscotland · 15/08/2018 13:18

As long as he didn’t say it to her I don’t see the issue with a bout of initial frustration at his plans changing st short notice

LyndorCake · 15/08/2018 13:38

Did he say "oh, what a wimp" as a throwaway comment to you? Or did he start telling her she was a wimp? Was he aggressive? Slightly miffed? Teasing? Trying to be playful? I tell DH he is a wimp all the time, and vice versa! It's playful to us and absolutely harmless.

OliviaStabler · 15/08/2018 13:58

He's allowed to be pissed off. I would be too.

Why is dd upset?

joinUsAgain · 16/08/2018 01:56

I'd be slightly annoyed if I'd lost an expected day to myself. I love my children but I'm only human.

I also think your DD's a little wimpy. I'd say so about our children to DH. Not to them, of course.

You're being a bit unreasonable.

kmc1111 · 16/08/2018 02:19

Assuming he doesn’t actually tell her she’s a wimp or let it show through, what does it matter? He’s not trying to get out of picking her up or anything, he’s just expressing his frustration.

He thought he was going to have time to himself. There are days I would have burst into tears or sworn like a sailor if I thought I had some precious time alone and got that call.

hayli · 16/08/2018 02:36

Some people would be really disappointed if a day off they had planned and were looking forward to was suddenly cancelled at very short notice. They are often called humans.

Yeah feel free to be dissapointed butbtough luck its called been a parent no need to call his child a wimp.

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread