To feel overwhelmed and confused about choices re ADs and anxiety in pregnancy and

[cheerfullysleepless]

Been up and down with anxiety since 5 w (now
16) and feeling overwhelmed about what to do. Have had some good patches with support of husband and exercising every day and getting wiser to triggers. Seen a soecialosy psychiatrist and had advice re ADs and also been seeing psychologist for weekly cbt and counselling which has been hugely helpful. Counsellor on holiday for 4 weeks and 3 weeks til next appt so a bit at sea and had bad day today and wobble yesterday too. Main fear is impact of anxiety on baby itself, but been told that my anxiety is moderate and not constant even though can feel like it is and as have lots of protective factors and good diet, sleep etc they are confident (psychiatrist and psychologist) baby not at any risk just my wellbeing. Did start sertraline but made me so jittery and couldn’t sleep so with doctor knowledge and approval stopped after few days. Am now wondering if should have stuck it out as without them am ok lots of the time though generally quite “on edge” but sometimes have horrible sense of doom am harming my daughter. Was exactly the same with my first pregnancy with my son and he’s great and least anxious person ever but anxiety sometimes says am pushing luck to expect same outcome again. My husband and parents and friends are so clear that they think the psychiatrist who thinks my profile of anxiety harmless for baby is right (she’s super impressive and informed so can’t see why she’d say anything confidently if was unsure) but also v supportive of ADs as understand risks v low but I can’t square taking ADs again that made it worse to start with if carry any risk with just soldiering through apparently risk free anxiety, especially when can’t rewlly believe risk free anyway. Sorry. This is mental. Am feeling mental. Does anyone have any experience of this who can help me understand how they made a decision either way re ADs or getting through it without or any other paths?! Thank you and sorry for mad rant.

Specialist psychiatrist that should say!

I'm sorry your post is a bit confusing or I'm just thick i took sertraline all through my pregnancy though and have a very happy seemingly anxious free toddler. They wouldn't prescribe something if there was even minimal risk to your unborn baby. Pregnancy is hard if you are struggling I would say take them.

Hi I was wondering how you are getting on.
First things first: The psychiatrist has stated that your anxiety will absolutely not harm the baby. This is brilliant!
If you still feel uncomfortably anxious for your own sake you can take sertraline. I know it makes you feel yucky at the start. If you cannot face the side efffects I would attempt to keep going with diet and exercise and good sleep hygiene for now. Continue counselling when your therapist is back.
See how you feel then.
You are doing amazing

@rollyrollyrollyrolly you’re not thick at all, I just reread and I can’t understand it either! Think in hopefully bit clearer summary the issues are:

1. I’m scared my anxiety is harming my baby. My psychiatrist and psychologist have said they are confident that at my level it is not. I don’t always believe them but know am not well so can’t trust my own mind and most of the time cope by not thinking about it, distraction, exercise etc.

1. I tried meds and initially got worse so came off with doctor approval. Been doing quite ok and now had relapse, I think because been on own a bit this week and counsellor away til September and wondering if should have stuck them out.

1. However - meds do apparently carry tiny risk and if anxiety carries none maybe should just carry on without?

1. If I’ve been told anxiety not harmful why am I still worried and in crap crap rare moments checking out online articles about risk of anxiety to unborn babies that I don’t understand as not studied science in 20 years and wasn’t very good at it at the time.

Basically going round in circles and feeling confused and overwhelmed.

Hello @LapinR0se!!! You’re always so lovely. I’m just scared they’ve both said that to be nice. Apparently am not depressed and tbh don’t think I am and all the studies relate to depression or women in far worse situations eg violence in the Home etc rather than anxiety for no real reason at all other than daft hormones. Know doctors don’t lie really just struggle to believe anything positive when get like this whereas a study from a random google search is like the gospel....

Sounds to me like the sertraline will help then (i am not in way qualified) even though the first 2 weeks are yucky. Have you ever heard of mood diaries? I did them when I had CBT (and still do them now occasionally) and found them very helpful for situations like yours.

Basically you write down a thought (in your case anxiousness harming the baby) and then right down FACTS that support and contradict that, they have to be facts though so it is a fact the psychologist person said your anxiety won't harm your baby. And then carry on until you have can t think of anything more to add to the list, examine the list and hopefully stuff will be put into perspective for you.

I'm sure there are much better examples and explanations online.

I once heard a lady on the radio say that u have to have bad days to have good days with mental illness. Ie when you have a bad day u realise actually ur doing ok most of the time. My advice would be your baby needs a happy mum to take care of them, do what you can to make yourself well, if that means tablets take them, they won’t give u anything without telling the risks, and usually it’s very low. Good luck I bet your doing way better than you think xxxxx

Thanks all - will see how do and make decision when the counsellor comes back. That’s so true re bad days for good days - hard to believe am ever moderate but on days like this can see I normally really am! I need to believe the psychiatrist really. Doctor friends tell me if anything pressure on professionals is to be more pessimistic than reassuring so she wouldn’t be just being nice would she? That’s not how it works? It’s a good idea re the diaries too just tricky when find it hard to be clear about what are facts! Xxx

The doctor has absolutely no interest in lying to you. In fact I think that goes against the Hippocratic oath and would be considered clinical negligence.
There is no way they will tell you something just to make you feel better.
It is therefore a medical fact that your pregnancy anxiety will not affect your baby. Google search can never replace a personal consultation with an expert.

you're right and so kind, thank you. dh home and calmer now - do you work in a caring field lke nursing etc? ALways sound so lovely and reassuring! xx

I was suffering with anxiety when I fell pregnant and also taking citalopram - and like your first, my DS is so happy and confident. The risks are extremely low and little unborn babies and children are more resilient than we realise. Ultimately you are worrying because you care, it's just the anxiety let's your worries run away and escalate. Like the PPs have said, look after yourself as best you can, and try not to be so hard on yourself. Do you practice mindfulness? I use and app called Headspace and I find it really helps me get some peace when my mind is racing - could be worth a go? Sending best wishes and I hope you feel better soon xx

Hello. When I was worried about taking citalopram while breastfeeding I contacted the pharmacist team at the mental health trust treating me. I found them very helpful. The view from my team was that a well and medicated me with very small risk to the baby was better than a mentally unwell me.

Is that an option for you to get some additional advice?

I’ll be honest that nothing really reassured me but a big part of what I was struggling with was health anxiety for my baby son nothing reassured me about anything.

I do believe though that what’s best for the mum’s health is nearly always the best thing for the baby’s health too. Even if it is a compromise from the ‘perfect position’ that pregnant / breastfeeding women wouldn’t take any medication, eat any unhealthy food, undergo any stress of any kind, etc etc etc

I hope you’re feeling better soon.

Thanks both for sharing your experiences really appreciate it. I think I’m not so worried about the harm of the ads as can see in calmer moments is negligible but not being able to sleep again which really pushes me over the edge. Do realise that’s not forever though so if dip again when counsellor back will talk through pros and cons. Feel much calmer now thank you :) xxx

Not being able to sleep is so horrid - that's how I get when I start worrying and before I know it the anxiety fog is swirling. I found citalopram really helped with that. As you say it's not forever and sometimes just remembering that helps. Glad you're feeling a bit calmer now xx

@cheerfullysleepless how are you getting on?