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Original poster

Wedding Abroad ?

29 replies

dressesdressesdresses · 13/08/2018 22:44

Me and dp want to get married however he wants to get married abroad and I do not.

I feel it just wouldn't feel like a wedding, no body would come because they would have to pay for flights, outfits, hotels etc etc.

He doesn't want to do a wedding here because they are all the same yada yada...

Anyone have any stories of abroad weddings or have experience of being a guest?

Trying to work out the beat way too go

OP posts:
Firtreefir · 13/08/2018 22:46

Could you have your wedding here, and then go somewhere exotic on your honeymoon and have a ceremony of sorts there?

lastqueenofscotland · 13/08/2018 22:46

Unless you can afford to fly people out assume a lot of people won’t go.
I wouldn’t take annual leave/pay to go abroad for a wedding

Firtreefir · 13/08/2018 22:47

Personally, I haven't been to any weddings abroad because I'm not willing to use my precious holiday time to go somewhere I haven't chosen myself.

I've missed 3 friends' weddings as a result.

If it was my sister or brother, I would probably go though.

LoniceraJaponica · 13/08/2018 22:48

Judging from the number of threads on here about weddings abroad I feel that a wedding abroad would be a very small one indeed. They are a massive imposition on any potential guests.

You both need to decide whether place is more important than loved ones attending.

katielouise3 · 13/08/2018 22:48

I wouldn't travel out of the UK for a wedding. Not even a family one.

Lots of people will think the same.

StoneofDestiny · 13/08/2018 22:49

Went to a fab wedding abroad. Heaps on money spent on it and guests very well looked after. We made a holiday of it ~ so no complaints. Only people close to you and with the money will go of course, as it's a very very expensive option for guests - flights, accommodation, food, outfits etc etc

AskMeHow · 13/08/2018 22:52

I've only been invited to one, we went as it was DH's close childhood friend.

It wasn't somewhere I would have chosen to go on holiday but we made the best of it and had a nice time. If money was more of an issue, probably only DH would have gone.

Unless you're paying for flights I would expect a pretty small turnout.

AnneLovesGilbert · 13/08/2018 22:53

Weddings here can’t possibly “all be the same”, as the people getting married here are all different. He’s being daft.

No one I know has had a wedding like we had because it was what we wanted, not what anyone else wanted.

You need a wedding you both want. A ceremony here and a lovely honeymoon abroad as suggested is a good compromise.

I’ve been to a few weddings abroad and they’ve been nice but the hassle, annual leave, expense isn’t something I’m keen to do again unless it was someone I was extremely close to.

Does he have somewhere in mind or is anywhere not here good enough? I’d suggest some places that you’d both like for a honeymoon and then plan a wedding here which your friends and family can come to if that’s what you want.

junebirthdaygirl · 13/08/2018 22:57

My cousins dd got married abroad. Piles of people went. They all planned together that they would go and stay a few extra days. A bus collected them from the airport and they felt well looked after. They had an absolute ball and were talking about it for ages after. It wasn't just close family but cousins and friends.
So it can be fun. You know if your relatives/ friends are the kind to be up for it or not.

Bambamber · 13/08/2018 22:58

We had a blessing abroad and legal ceremony and party at home. Best of both worlds Grin

Original poster
dressesdressesdresses · 13/08/2018 23:27

He said if I can find something better than your average country house wedding then he wouldn't mind not getting married abroad. He likes the idea of the beach and the outside. He has social anxiety so sat in a small room surrounded by people isn't the bet option for him. I think the sound of the wind and stuff would put him at ease more

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 13/08/2018 23:33

Well I got married outside by the sea Grin

So you won’t be unique, and we weren’t the first to do it either, but it was beautiful and perfect, personal and exactly what we wanted. And in the UK!

BunsOfAnarchy · 13/08/2018 23:33

There are some brilliant beaches and outdoor gardens within the UK that could be used as wedding venues..
My husband proposed to me in a Japanese garden at a hotel in Chester. Absolutely stunning location for a wedding.

Odoreida · 13/08/2018 23:36

You could have a barn wedding in the countryside - totally different to a country house. You need a bit of shelter because of the weather but if you are both keen and interested and have time it's possible to come up with solutions. Do you have a bit of the UK (assuming that's where you are) that is special / convenient to you both?

BunsOfAnarchy · 13/08/2018 23:38

A quick google took me to Fforest weddings (Welsh).
Looks beautiful. Have look even if just for ideas.

FASH84 · 13/08/2018 23:38

Ours was fab, twenty odd guests travelled then a big party when we got back for everyone who couldn't travel.

AnnabelleLecter · 13/08/2018 23:40

We went to a family wedding abroad, the bride and groom are both loaded and paid £1000 towards each person's expenses. It was absolutely fantastic.

Nodancingshoes · 14/08/2018 07:16

I got married abroad - European destination. Family and friends came on both sides. As it was a short flight, most came just for a weekend to the actual wedding to keep their costs down. We didn't expect them to but it was great to have them there.

Squirrelblanket · 14/08/2018 07:20

I got married abroad. We didn't invite any guests, problem solved. Grin

I joke but neither of us wanted a big wedding and I do feel that most weddings are pretty much the same. So while it's not for everyone, it was the right choice for us and a perfect day!

We did have a big party for everyone when we got back though.

Lauren83 · 14/08/2018 07:22

We went to a friends wedding last month in Skiathos it was amazing, we had a lovely holiday and the wedding was perfect about 50 guests at a guess, to my knowledge most people invited went and it was great to get a holiday with friends and for the kids to all play together. The ceremony was on the beach and a sit down meal just next to the beach. They then had a small wedding reception in the uk. I think how many go depends on how close to your friends you are, there's a large friendship group mostly couples with kids who often holiday together anyway so everyone wanted to go.

PartridgeInAPineTree · 14/08/2018 07:22

You say your husband has social anxiety - could it be that he doesn't want to get married with an audience, and so the idea of a wedding abroad with no guests really appeals to him?

IGiorni · 14/08/2018 07:26

I got married abroad, we had about 25 guests and nobody complained about the cost etc. Everyone used it as their holiday for that year and other than the actual wedding, there was no expectation for them to spend all their time with us. We then had a reception when we got back. All in all I think it was a lot cheaper and less stressful.

IllBeAtTheBarIfYouNeedMe · 14/08/2018 07:27

Look at Bournemouth beach weddings. My dsis was going to go abroad for her wedding until she saw them.

LostInShoebiz · 14/08/2018 07:29

Hate to break it to your future DH but unless you get married in a country with a wildly different culture and adopt their traditions wholesale, a wedding abroad is exactly like one in the UK except hotter, stickier, maybe by the sea (but remember you can’t get in the sea because you’re all togged up) and a lot of the conversation revolves around who couldn’t make it and why.

Even if people are willing and able to fly, unless they’re very well off and have multiple holidays each year, you are basically choosing their family holiday for them.

Can you tell I absolutely can’t stand destination weddings for the sake of it?

FancyADoughnut · 14/08/2018 07:29

I got married far away at a very costly time for holidays so I didn't invite anyone.

However, that's because I didn't want the cost and hassle of a traditional wedding so it was in effect a luxury holiday where i happened to get married.

If you want lots of guests then you need to get married at home or in a country that it easy and cheap for guests to get to. I wonder if your future DH just doesn't want the 'big audience' and a wedding abroad obviously cuts that possibility down.

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