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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is awkward?!

43 replies

Cornpoppin · 13/08/2018 19:36

New flatmate moved into my place around a week ago and we haven’t crossed paths yet (different schedules etc)

Can hear the two guys chatting in the kitchen, my doors a bit open and I’m working, they are right next door (feet away) and they know I’m in here! Im friendly with one of them but as mentioned haven’t met second. I feel too awkward to go in!

OP posts:

Bluntness100 · 13/08/2018 20:02

Honestly you need to live with these guys. They'd stop talking when you came in and introduce themselves and be friendly. There is nothing to worry about.

Astrid2 · 13/08/2018 20:03

I've read a thread just like this before? Like a few months ago! How weird.

Howhot · 13/08/2018 20:04

I get it op but I suffered from social anxiety for years. It doesn’t effect my day to day life now but I would still be over thinking introducing myself to someone. Just go make a cup of tea next time, something quick so you can escape if it feels awkward.

ThistleAmore · 13/08/2018 20:05

Are you serious that none of you would be a bit nervous about introducing yourself to a new flatmate

Not if they're living in my house.

Did you honestly not even meet this bloke before he moved in? When I lived in house/flatshares, we all 'vetted' potential new tenants as a group - I'd be more wary of letting somebody I had never even met sleep under the same roof as me, which apparently you've been doing for a week.

Go and say hullo, FFS.

Original poster

Cornpoppin · 13/08/2018 20:06

Its sort of an Airbnb situation. I’m actually very confident and chatty when I’ve introduced myself to someone, it’s jjst the build up. Thanks for all the kind comments, some lovely people on here tonight

OP posts:

ShumpaLumpa · 13/08/2018 20:08

Yes it's OP's house but they're not her brothers or friends. A little initial awkwardness is not unusual. Let's not make OP feel like a freak!

Bunnyfuller · 13/08/2018 20:10

So they know your door is open and now they’re thinking you’re a weird solitary eavesdropper.

Not helping

Original poster

Cornpoppin · 13/08/2018 20:12

I was working...!

OP posts:

PurpleArmy · 13/08/2018 20:19

I'd be just like you OP, even now and I'm in my 40s.

When I was younger, my brother used to have his friends over and they sat in our front living room with my sister and another brother. I was so shy I'd just stand at the door, willing myself to go in, but couldn't.

redstararnie76 · 13/08/2018 20:21

For what's it's worth, I'd be nervous too - especially back when I was your age. However, chances are he feels a little uncomfortable too - if he's not been back in his room long, why don't you take a deep breath, knock on his door and say that you're just putting the kettle and would he like a cuppa? Then, whatever he says, you've broken the ice - and you may just have made him feel a bit better too!

MirriVan · 13/08/2018 20:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lostinjapan · 13/08/2018 20:37

Go and knock on his door now and say a quick hello. I'm very shy/socially anxious, so I understand exactly how you feel OP, but you just have to get it over with.

EdisonLightBulb · 13/08/2018 20:37

I think I would have just walked in, shy as I am and simply said "hi, I'm Edison, pleased to meet you" then done a "where do you work" "do you know the area" "fancy a cup of tea" then finally "Righto off back to my room, got work to do, nice to meet you"

Job done.

You could brave it and knock on his door and say "hi, I'm Cornpoppin,...."

HotblackDesiatoto · 13/08/2018 20:42

Are you serious that none of you would be a bit nervous about introducing yourself to a new flatmate

Well personally I wouldn't live somewhere where someone I'd never met could move in, I think thats pretty weird. But since you're someone who has chosen to do that, I'm surprised you're so nervous about it.

ThistleAmore · 13/08/2018 20:44

@HotblackDesiatoto

Yeah, this.

IceCreamFace · 13/08/2018 20:47

Are you serious that none of you would be a bit nervous about introducing yourself to a new flatmate

I would be! Some people wouldn't be but being nervous around new people is not something you can just turn off. I would say you're putting the kettle on anyone else want a cup of tea? Perfect British ice breaker! (Totally reminds me of that episode of spaced where they've just moved in together, been chatting for a while and Daisy offers Tim another cup of cup of tea she he replies "no thanks 6 is my limit")

Justgivemesomepeace · 13/08/2018 20:51

Has one got a Canadian accent? If so he's my relative and was hoping to find his house share sociable. Go say hi- if it's him he's bloody lovely and would love a chat.

Ragwort · 13/08/2018 20:59

I'd be much more nervous about NOT knowing who is sleeping in my house, I can't understand your situation - if they are YOUR flatmates didn't you meet them when they come to view the place ?

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