My personal life is suffering due to work

[Isitreallyjustajob]

Does anyone have experience of work taking over your personal life?

I started a new job under two years ago and absolutely loved it. I excelled and often received comments from senior management that indicated I was on track for quick promotion and pay rises.

This alongside my enjoyment meant I put in many excess hours, once I worked almost 70 hours on a 36 hour/week contract. Extra hours were unpaid.

Fast forward to now. The management structure has very quickly changed due to a full company restructure, my role is at risk of redundancy but as I have less than 2years service I don’t qualify. I may be offered a different position but it’s not an attractive offer!

I’m devastated and it’s really affecting my personal life. My BF is getting really grumpy as I don’t want to do anything. AIBU?

Hi OP. Can I ask you to clarify what you might be being unreasonable about?

I've posted about work stuff on here previously. I am in a profession and it's not unusual to be expected to work 50+ or even 60+ hours each week without time in lieu or additional pay (although admittedly many of the roles have a good salary if you are qualified and work for a good employer).

I enjoy my job and feel fulfilled and happy in being able to work. However, in my experience overdoing it has caused health problems - MH problems including anxiety and depression, plus sleeping poorly, poor posture, putting on weight. Also I have learned the hard way that working incredibly hard can lead to an employer taking advantage of you, and it seems that you have experienced this too.

I read somewhere that when those who pass away look at their lives nobody says that they regretted not working harder...instead they regretted not spending time with family and friends, volunteering or pursuing talents or hobbies. Being able to work and enjoying work is fantastic, but it's not the be all and the end all and overdoing it can be debilitating, both to health and other things that really matter.

Seventy hours a week. Why oh why. What misery . No one ever got promoted because they are obsessive. You get promoted because you're great. It is madness to squander your life like this.