To ask if London living is all that?

[nellyolsenscurl]

Inspired by a thread where posters are saying things like 'unless you live in London you couldn't possibly understand the benefits' and 'London living is one of the best things a child could have' (paraphrased, but you get the poi t). One poster said that her dd's friend didn't have a bedroom, she had a bed in the hallway but this is worth it for London life etc.

I've visited and yes it does seem amazing, but I was surprised at how busy the underground was at rush hour, I didn't think public transport was that cheap and in some parts the signs about knife crime/murder was daunting. Obviously as well extortionate house prices/rents mean more likelihood of living in a smaller place.

So London Livers (TM) please tell me about the great things (and any negatives) In my dreams when my dc leave the nest I will buy a lift conversion in Neal's Yard with those lovely coloured facades 😬

When I visited a friend there with kids, I thought it was pure hell with a pushchair.

I think that's why people often live in flats. Which is where we started yesterday's thread.... Though you must remember that it becomes relative. I bought my first flat in a respectable but kind of up and coming neighbourhood at a level which was affordable because of my London salary. It went up in price as the area gentrified and the market rose in general. I was able to upgrade to a house for only £60k more than I sold it for. Over the years I have invested more in it. It's now worth over £1m and would be inaccessible to the equivalent of me ten years ago. But somewhere else that's currently a bit gritty might be accessible to those buyers. Their currently closed off reservoir might get some investment and the area might become filled with naice shops and suddenly their place is worth a lot more than they paid. I don't think this is definitely a good thing btw, but it's what happens and is how ordinary families manage to live in London.

Mrsramsay it is with a massive one, yes. It's not with a decent little umbrella fold up or a babyzen. I have taken DS everywhere by pushchair in London since he was born - he is now 2.5 and we still take the buggy everywhere. I don't know any different as I've never been able to drive.

I obviously wouldn't take him on the tube at rush hour in it, but then I'm not a glutton for punishment!

I can honestly say that as a child growing up in London I wasn't starved of nature it just came in different forms. We would have school trips to nature reserves, woods and in primary we did city farms for kids. We all went to a farm in Devon for a week to learn/work. That was a charity thing as SE London school no idea if they still do it.

It's definitely different to what I now take for granted of living by the sea and fields which is my choice.

As for the crime element it does depend on where you are but it's definitely there central London always seemed to be very well controlled but this is mostly as a result of tourists and cctv with targeted police force so you don't see a lot of it. This was a lot less the further that you got away from the tourist hot spots until there was the nice parts again of seven oaks etc. Although an area which used to be rough where I grew up now has trendy bars which I find bizarre....

London living is just London living. I grew up in the countryside and there are advantages and disadvantages to both. Seeing my nephew setting up his work experience is an eye opener in London I can tell you.

My kids are in a genuinely multicultural school and that does make them more accepting of other cultures in that they don't even think about not accepting them. They go on school trips to major museums that are at the forefront of their subject. They are much better at knowing how to take turns/share playground equipment than I was at their age - in fact I'd say they are much better at being social in general, because there are always a load of people about. Generally if they want to do something there is a group in the locality doing it.

However they don't have the freedom I had as a kid. They don't have the air I had as a kid. They don't have all the physical pursuits of the countryside. Their long range eyesight is shit. Their friends keep moving away.

It suits us for now. I don't know why people feel they can slag off others' choices so vehemently. Londoners tend not to tbh.

Yes I have to admit crime bothers me a lot, and more lately as it seems more indiscriminate, selfish as that may be. I don't know what the answer is other than more police. I did look at equivalent crime statistics in other cities and it's not vastly different per capita but I imagine it'd feel safer somewhere a lot smaller. Then again you get awful things happening where you least expect it and it feels like a very negative reason to want to move. Mostly I manage to ignore it but it depends a bit on my general mood.

@Breadsticksandhummus only a couple of years ago. I felt a lot more unsafe at night in Hackney, there was a lot more news of violence etc. I did like living there but thought a lot more about being alone at night than I did when I lived in the SE.

Londoners tend not to tbh

Of course they do. Just like the famed "northerner" does.

It happens when people get defensive, which as I said earlier I can't understand.

Meh, ive lived in zone 6 all my life and the good thing is going on nights out, loads of clubs and not much travel between, but apart from that I cannot see many benefits. There is constant police cars, overcrowding, flat developments springing up on every corner, bored teens causing trouble, drug addicts hiding in most nearby parks so they’re not safe. I won’t feel safe raising my children here so we are moving out into the suburbs to start our family.

One intangible positive that is a bit hidden is the social capital. I think this is why social mobility is actually pretty good in London but it can benefit middle class DC even more and contribute to rising inequality. Dd goes to an ordinary state school but her peers are the children of pretty successful types in their fields - largely from the creative industries but there are also well known politicians and academics and all sorts. I feel like a poor relation in comparison even though I have a professional job. It's hard to admit without coming across as an awful snob which I honestly am not, but from my work with the social mobility foundation I do see the value of this social capital and I do think my DC may benefit from the opportunities it affords.

JacquesHammer That 'tbh' might've been a bit naughty I give you

I do get quite a bit of stick from my Northern friends for defecting I must say. And for having children with 'posh' (Sarf East Landan!!) accents. But some Londoners' prejudices about the North are pretty shocking too.

longestlurkerever I agree with you on 'social capital', but wasn't brave enough to make the point myself.

I love to visit London, the choice of restaurants are amazing, i’m only 30 mins away on the train but love to come back to open fields, fresh air and space. London exhausts me every time I go.

I live in London but not central , we don't even have a tube line here .
We do have the DLR now though which helps a lot to be fair .

I think unless you have the money its like living anywhere , Crap .

I have been to the North (Liverpool and Manchester) and would happily leave here for there if chance permitted.

Mandarine that sounds amazing and had given me some ideas for bank Hol weekend when I'll be in London. But surely the shard afternoon tea every weekend is not a sustainable lifestyle 😱

Also nobu for dinner would be a once a year type of treat for me. Guess I'm not cut out to be a cool londoner after all 😢😁

Jean Claude I've never done either of those things! I did have a Vietnamese lunch deal (£8) on Sat and an indoor picnic at the science museum. I'd ignore posters who say you need the income of a king to enjoy London as there is loads to be accessed for free or very cheap, but it's probably true that you need a bit of disposable income to make the most of it. You need enough for travel for a start, though many people would have a travel card for work which makes leisure travel free, and others save money by cycling. I've got better lately at taking my own snacks, lunches and coffee because you can get caught out when you find yourself a long way from home with tired and hungry kids. Some things are surprisingly cheap - my MIL stocks up on fruit and veg on her way back up North but anything involving paying for a service (including childcare etc) is expensive, on top of accommodation.

I also always wonder why people suggest Hamleys and the Lego store to visitors with kids as they sound like hell on earth to me but each to their own!

I grew up in London as a child in the late 80's I did go to galleries quite frequently, as a teenager I went up to London to find clothes to buy as I liked original Levi's, the choice of shoes and clothes that I couldn't buy at our local high Street in South West London.

I now live in Brighton but we live next to a train station and our lives through work and family are tied to London still. After I read this thread I asked my son who is a preteen whether he would like what his cousins have- immediate access to central london for the teenage years and living in a very desired part of London but he said he would hate it as he would be scared going out at night on public transport. Where we live- Brighton, you could walk home if there was no transport. He also said the biggest thing he'd miss would be the beach. For example, on his last day of year 6 there was an impromptu barbecue on the lifeguard beach. This is not central Brighton (touristy beaches) but further along. The kids organise themselves playing games on the lawns near the promenade and swimming in the sea. The parents are around with the food but they have alot of freedom, in the end we went home at 10 as it was still very hot and some parents turning up after work meant the celebrations carried on. There are loads of teenagers from secondary schools that meet on the beach and swim in the summer with relative safety on the lifeguard beach, loads to do in Brighton for teenagers as well. Equally, a PP said that people in full-time jobs won't be visiting the beach very much if you live in this kind of place but I find that's not the case. My husband works in London and Brighton, I work as well but we definitely have been to the beach this summer on a school/ work night as do alot of others. Equally, alot of people I know work in the creative industries so are fairly flexible how they work. It's not the touristy bit that people visit though. Basically, there's an amazing sense of community and people are very laid back about life.

Equally, we have the South Downs on our doorstep for proper countryside but tbh my eldest who is 12 is not that interested anymore. My youngest (7) still very much enjoys the walks we sometimes go on where she finds toadstools that she refers to as fairy houses. She likes these farms that have loads of active stuff to do as well, the llama park that has reindeers at Christmas (not as a prop, eating grass on the fields). However, I do appreciate that my brother drives out to Hertfordshire if they want a bit of countryside, so it works both ways.

I love the theatre and my husband is an Architect so insists we take the kids to London fairly regularly to expose them to what the Capital has to offer but we could never live there as we wouldn't want to sacrifice the life above and we simply couldn't afford the life we would want there.

I don't see Brighton as particularly safe for children tbh.
Bullying in schools is rife, from junior onwards.
You certainly wouldn't let them out alone without them being attacked by precious football kids and their parents (no I am not joking, my son got kicked so hard by a football dad that his foot was bleeding. That was because he asked if he could join in).
Horrible place, full of people who are convinced it is all lovely.

I mean, you are talking about Portslade right? vile place.

I don't recognise that Brighton at all- do you live in Brighton? Junior schools rife with bullying- which ones?

I am definitely not referring to portslade- no.

which ones?
West Hove is the one I have in mind.

oh its just that you mentioned the lawns and the llama farm..
Honestly I just think that Brighton is a very dark place, and some people don't notice this.