Bloody racist money owing dinilo brother

[MsBagelLady]

My brother [younger, only brother we are adults] borrowed a grand off me the one time I could afford to lend it to him. It's been a while and he seems to be doing ok[ we are not close and I see him going on holiday, buying a camper, affording stuff on social media.] I've asked for the grand back and been told by him that I am out of order for 'demanding' the money back, been called a 'CF' and WTF he owes us [ single parent family or not, he bloody owes it and I shall continue to demand ask to be paid back. AIBU or should I STFU and fund DBs pub lunches, holidays, weddings etc?

is it a thousand or more u say onme in your op then plural later

Dinilo is a traveller thing, maybe a Welsh thing dim yn gwybod

It's a grand @Gabsalot
does it matter?

Well, it seems to me that you can demand the money back but have fuck all resources to turn to if he says Nope.

So you are fucked.

You do have texts of him acknowledging the debt though... if you do go down the court route but that would probs only be wise out of principle rather than the £ because I don't think it's cheap. But I don't know 🤷🏼‍♀️

Take him to court if you have any texts acknowledging it from him.
Tell your parents your intentions.
Even if the court costs a bit, I reckon it would be worth it after the run around he has given you.

The only other thing I can think of is if you have access or are invited over to his home. Take a large male friend and collect up the gaming console, TV and anything else you can - and tell him it it's in lieu of the debt . Pay the money, get your stuff. ( That might be a very dodgy option and somewhat illegal, but I'd do it personally)

Or show up everywhere he goes that you can, kids in tow and in front of his friends/your family ask for the money back - rinse and repeat.

Hate people who take advantage like this.

why is he racist?

no yanbu but maybe you could try calming down and asking for a reasonable monthly payment. I assume his pub lunches are not costing a grand so maybe he has a bit of disposable cash but not £1k?

A grand is a lot to lend someone without some kind of understanding of how they will pay the money back. Most people who borrow that amount aren't going to have the full amount to pay back at once. Maybe next time don't lend it.

A very area specific insult.

PUP

I was born in Chester and live fairly close to it now, but have never heard the words "dinlo", "dinlow" or "dinilow". I learn something new every day!
(Misses point and wanders off...)

It’s not a Chester thing. Faaaaar too North.

Dinilo is Romany for “crazy mind, idiot”

Just tell all his drinking mates, how much he owes you and maybe they can force him to pay you back with interest of another grand.

Dinlo is very specific to the southern city I live in. PUP indeed
It come from the Romany I believe.

Oh and OP. Just demand your money back and then cut your brother out, esp if racist

Go to Small Claims Court

www.gov.uk/make-court-claim-for-money

Small claims court. Definitely.

And you don’t sound awful, you sound pissed off. As I think anyone would be in this situation.

Lol someone from Portsmouth I'm guessing. appreciation for the use of dinlo

I was just about to say dinlo is a Portsmouth term too @smigglepiggle and @Soooooze! 😊 I live in Wales now and people never have a clue what I mean if I refer to someone as a dinlo. 😂

Lol @mummabubs so you'd understand if I said:

Alright babes, shall we go daan taan? My sister is being a right dinny cow at the moment. We were down Albert Road last week and she copped the needle and had a massive squin over nothing. Stupid mare.

Yer luv I would @smigglepiggle 😂😉

I've got a 9mo DS and I often say that he's having a squinny or "squinnying" and again people don't have a clue what I'm on about! My main memory of my dad growing up was "quit your squinnying girls"! 🙈

Haha! I'm an interloper but my sister (who also lives there) says I can sound as Pompey as they come. Married to a docky doesn't help mind

Why are you asking if you are BU when you keep saying you are determined to still ask for it back?

Dinlo was originally a Romany/traveller term meaning slow or retarded, so pretty offensive really. If OP had said her brother was a retard everyone would (rightly) be up in arms.
Anyone not paying back a debt is unreasonable, that much is obvious, but as PPs have said the small claims court will get your further than insults.

Just leave it, but if and when your family try to pressure you into giving lending him more money just keep saying no and that he still owes you a grand from last and as a single parent you can not afford to lose and more money from your children's mouths. Just keep repeating it every time they ask.

Dinlo=stupid. I just think it’s a particularly scathing insult, can’t really help being stupid.

Call him a thieving scumbag. At least that’s something he could change if he wanted to.