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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Great neighbours and want to keep it that way...

7 replies

MrsChristmas123 · 09/08/2018 14:09

I have good neighbours in that they keep themselves to themselves, they tell me when they are not happy about something and they help me out when asked as I live on my own.

Basically we help each other out but are not in each other's faces.

I have never complained to my neighbours about anything as I am a great believer in compromise and tolerance and I don't like to make waves.

I was hoping someone to could help me decide whether this little problem I have is worth raising or letting it go.

There's just the two houses down a drive. I've lived there the longest, from the time the house was built and my neighbours are the 3rd occupiers.

When I first moved in the two houses were built on one piece of land which was divided. My neighbour's house is land locked and their only way out is over my land which creates the driveway. I understood from my deeds that I owned the land which is the driveway and my neighbours have an easement (right of way) over my land to gain access to my house. My deeds say that my neighbours should pay me 2/3 of the cost of maintenance of the drive but the cost is split down the middle. My neighbour's deeds say the same thing as I have a copy of them, if i'm right of course.

So far so good. We manage the drive situation pretty well and I have make sure that my neighbours and their visitors have access 24 hours. So it usually stays clear all of the time and no one parks on it.

As I said, I go out of my way to be reasonable. I maintain the hedges along the driveway and make sure the vision is not obscured going out onto the main road.

I use the same gardener as my neighbours and he had been working for me for several months. He did the hedges and lawns for me. He came on Monday (when it was incredibly hot) to carry out some maintenance to the edge of the drive for me. He normally parks in front of my house but, for some reason, he parked on the drive (he has a big 4x4) and he stayed parked there all day. I didn't say anything as it was hot and he was working on the drive, my neighbours were out all day and there was access to squeeze past his car/truck.

Around lunchtime I saw a black car parked next to the gardeners 4 x 4 so the access was blocked and a woman chatting to the gardener. I went over to find who this lady was and it turned out to be the gardener's girlfriend bringing gardener lunch. They stayed for about half hour after I approached them a second time saying that the drive should be clear and could she reverse into the front of my house. I was a bit surprised as they both became very aggressive at this point and the girlfriend drove off. The gardener accused me of being rude to his girlfriend, apparently I had told her 'to get off my land', which I most certainly had not! I put the incident down to the hot weather, stress and stuff not do with me. Although I was a bit upset about it.

I spoke the gardener that evening to clear the air as he'd finished the job and just left, sending me a text telling me how much I owed him. He seemed very angry and stressed. I explained to him about the drive being open all of the time and that I owned it.

He told me that my neighbour had told him that the driveway is a shared driveway thus he was allowed to park on the drive and not in front of my house. I have paid him and sacked him because I can't have irate girlfriends turning up unannounced and he was very rude to me.

This is probably a storm in a teacup and one off incident to be forgotten. I was just a bit surprised how quickly it kicked off though and I did feel a bit frightened when this woman bore down on me.

Would you speak to the neighbours about the drive and their view that it is a shared drive or leave it? I must admit they have referred to it as a shared drive before and now I'm wondering do they understand what an easement (right of way ) is? If they think it's shared driveway and their deeds say so then my deeds are wrong...

I don't know whether to leave things or speak to them about it...

OP posts:
Hont1986 · 09/08/2018 14:37

I think it is a shared drive because you both have the use of it. I wouldn't bother having an awkward conversation about legal ownership over just them using the (accurate, in this case) phrase 'shared drive'.

AJPTaylor · 09/08/2018 14:53

I think that shared driveway is just a common everyday term used and you are overthinking it a bit.
Our last house had a shared driveway. It was like yours but we all called it a shared driveway to highlight that we both needed it to be kept clear 24/7. All visitors were told by both houses it was shared.
I wouldnt give it another thought. Angry gardener probably misunderstood.

scaryteacher · 09/08/2018 15:42

Nope, you need to deal with it I think. We have the same situation in that we own the drive, pay for the maintenance thereof, and next door has a right of way over it to access their drive, which is gated.

When the last neighbours came to sell, the drive was described as shared on the particulars, which it isn't. Having spoken to the EAs and explained, they asked me what I thought I knew about it, in a most snippy tone. I explained that we paid the mortgage on the drive, had the deeds to prove it, and would they now change their sales description? They still wouldn't change it, so I had to get quite pushy, and involve my letting agent who knew the EA. What I didn't want was problems arising at the search stage and a sale to be lost, or new neighbours with the impression that they own part of the drive.

A quick comment pointing out now that you own the drive, and they have a right of way, as opposed to it being shared, will reinforce this in your neighbours minds, and avoid issues later.

My NDNs knew it wasn't shared, but wanted to sell, so were happy to let the inaccuracy stand.

FrolickingForklift · 09/08/2018 15:56

Didn't you post this the other day?

Hilda40 · 09/08/2018 16:16

So you fell out with the poor gardener, who your NDN also uses, about some legal terminology of no interest to him. A word with your neighbours to clarify their understanding was all that was required. And the colour of the girlfriend's car is not very relevant.

ShartGoblin · 09/08/2018 16:17

I think they probably just couldn't be bothered to get into an explanation and were just trying to be helpful by offering to be inconvenienced to make things easier for him/you. From their perspective they were doing you a favour (if I'm understanding correctly that they were offering to be blocked in to help?) I would let it go.

Maelstrop · 09/08/2018 16:23

I would take the deeds round and just be very calm, point out that they have an easement, it is not shared ownership. This could otherwise lead to incorrect descriptions on the sale of the neighbour’s house and other legal problems later on. Sort it now.

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