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Original poster

Can I just have a little rant here

13 replies

Blueberries13 · 09/08/2018 11:56

I don't think anyone can give advice on this but I just want to write it out. My DP and I are on holiday. Amazing weather, great food and just the two of us- well and his Dad. It's started getting a bit annoying. We have been on holiday for a week now and my DP is on the phone with his dad constantly! Every morning they speak and almost every evening as well! Or when we go and visit a tourist attraction my partner is straight on to FaceTime with his dad and chatting about how amazing the place is etc. I just really want to have a moment with him and enjoy it rather just walking beside him while he is on the fuckinf phone. So bloody annoyed now. It's great that DP has a good relationship with his parents- I wish I could have the same but for fuck sake we meant to be on holiday together. I'm getting sick of it and really annoys how my 'FIL' (we are not married hence of the '') just keeps calling and doesn't appreciate the fact that his son is on holiday with his girlfriend and he should give us some fricking space.

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 09/08/2018 12:02

That does sound like an unusual amount of contact. Is he usually in touch with his dad all the time? Is his dad well?

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 09/08/2018 12:04

Have you asked your DP to pack it in for a bit? He may not realise how irritating it is.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/08/2018 12:05

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy is right - you need to speak up and tell your dp that it is annoying you. Otherwise you will spend the entire holiday fuming.

Original poster
Blueberries13 · 09/08/2018 12:16

I have told him in a gentle way. He's still on to him all the time. My DPs dad is perfectly healthy but he's been mentioning how my DP hasn't been home for a while but we live abroad and my DPs work is crazy busy. I know he should make a better effort of visiting his family. I am not interested in visiting them as probably every single time I went was spoiled by my DPs siblings and their kids. Just very rude kids and the whole visit becomes a nightmare every single time and I'm sick of paying £££ for plane tickets etc for that drama. Anyway as I said tho my DPs work is just too much and I barley manage to have any good quality time with him so I really hoped we could have a nice time together just the 2of us on holiday but yeah I don't know...

OP posts:
TheSerenDipitY · 09/08/2018 12:23

when your husband facetimes his dad wait a couple of mins then you facetime your husband and tell him you wish you could spend time with him alone without his dad being here every bloody minute hang up and walk away

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/08/2018 12:24

Maybe you need to be firmer and more direct, then - tell him that he is spoiling your holiday, and you want him to stop contacting his dad all the time!

Original poster
Blueberries13 · 09/08/2018 12:41

I really don't know how to talk to him about this. I'm not against his family but it's a bit too much for me.

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 09/08/2018 12:51

You don't have to be confrontational about it. Could you wait until he's not actually talking to his Dad and just gently say:

"I just wondered if you would mind spending less time on FaceTime with your Dad and a bit time more talking to me? We don't get much quality time together and I've been looking forward to this holiday for ages."

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/08/2018 12:53

"Darling - it is great that you get on so well with your father, but this is OUR holiday, and you are spending way too much of it talking to your dad. I am feeling neglected and ignored, and you are spoiling our holiday. Please put your phone away, and spend some time with me."

Jupiter9 · 09/08/2018 13:16

Sometimes it feels you've gone on holiday with a load of people who are not even there. All you want to do is spend time with your partner and children. Good luck.

Original poster
Blueberries13 · 09/08/2018 13:23

Yup more or less what I said to my partner @GreenFingersWouldBeHandy and @SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius his answer was I am not ignoring you and I'm not always on my phone. Then he makes a sarcastic joke about it how I'm nagging to spend time with me. So yeah, I don't know. I told him nicely to fuck off the phone but no change really

OP posts:
Lollypop701 · 09/08/2018 13:25

If he is that close to his family, it’s never going to change. Ever. It’s part of who he is, and what helps makes him such a good partner. He will be a great dad too I imagine. You need to accept it, join in and make the best of it. Or opt out altogether???? Staying and not accepting will cause endless arguments. Only you know if this is a major issue op. Good luck

Jupiter9 · 09/08/2018 23:53

What's the point of going away with your husband and kids. You might as well invite the rest of his family to join. I agree with you.

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