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Original poster

Re registering child’s birth after marriage?

61 replies

Faerie87 · 08/08/2018 17:59

Hello

Sorry if this has been asked before, I’ve been looking online for it too and can’t find a reason for doing it.

My partner and I are getting married next year, we have a daughter together, when we went to do the notification of marriage the registrar told us that it is a legal requirement to re register our daughter to show that she is a child of the marriage.

I have read that this has something to do with inheritance but I also have a Will in place, should that not be enough?

I will be taking my partners name and also gave our daughter his name so when we do get married we will all have the same surname, so I’m just not seeing the point to it? We also believe the days of illegitimate children and all that were in the past, so it has never really bothered us that we had our daughter before getting wed!

I understand that it is the law, but is it really relevant today?

Again apologies if this has been asked before :-) x

OP posts:
livingthegoodlife · 08/08/2018 19:19

It has no bearing on inheritance. Legitimacy reform act. Properly adopted children have the same status as natural children. People can exclude illegitimate children but only by specifically saying so in their Will.

TittyGolightly · 08/08/2018 19:22

but it’s sad that in today’s society that this is still a thing!

Likewise women changing their names on marriage.

MrFMercury · 08/08/2018 19:30

We were told this nearly 13 years ago and again when we registered DC2 after we were married. We've not done it because I resent the implications to me that we are re writing history. I'm not ashamed of the fact DC1 came before we were legally joined in marriage. She was the much bigger and permanent commitment. Do we really have to do it?

minisoksmakehardwork · 08/08/2018 19:47

We had this and have done this. Two children born before marriage and twins after. Although we waited until the twins were registered to sort the older two (just over year after wedding). Yes it's archaic but I did keep the original birth certificates as they also issue you with new ones and the old ones are crossed out in the register.

Original poster
Faerie87 · 08/08/2018 19:55

@TittyGolightly - Although women changing their names is not compulsory, at least it’s not anymore. In fact I know of men who have changed their name to the woman’s surname upon marriage. I believe that having a choice when it comes to whether a person decides to change their name is brilliant xx

OP posts:
Quandary2018 · 08/08/2018 19:57

I didn’t know about this ds was born before we married Dd after but we are now divorced!

Do I still need to re register my son?

TittyGolightly · 08/08/2018 19:57

In fact I know of men who have changed their name to the woman’s surname upon marriage.

Of all of the people that you know that have changed their names on marriage, are 50% men?

Has your OH considered changing his name?

AragonsGirl · 08/08/2018 20:02

I had a panic after reading a similar thread a while ago as our daughter was born before we married. Asked the registrar when we went to register our son (born after we married) and it turns out it’s not a requirement in Scotland. Panic over!

Original poster
Faerie87 · 08/08/2018 20:09

@TittyGolightly - nope he’s not looking to change his, but then again he is not forcing me to take his, in fact for the purpose of my job I’m keeping my old name.

It really does not matter to me, I honestly don’t mind taking his for everything else, it does not offend me in the slightest, but even if it did I would have the choice not to take his name.

A friend of mine took his new wife’s name as he did not want to keep his, due to him falling out with his father.

Another one double barrelled his.

So I guess I know of two men who have taken the name of their spouse.

I’m not quite sure what you’re asking or why you’re trying to insinuate that there is a problem about name changes when it comes to marriage, when for me personally there isn’t, but I’m sure you have your reasons xx

OP posts:
TittyGolightly · 08/08/2018 20:12

On a societal level, women changing their names is anti-feminist. I’ve had 14 years of assumptions and comments about my choice not to, because of the women who do. Until as many men change their names as women it will continue to be an issue to future generations of women.

So yes, personal choice is great. But it’s not an equal choice or one made without significant societal influence.

MrsOsM · 08/08/2018 20:18

I got married to DD's dad when she was 18 months old. I had no idea I hard to do this. I love in Scotland so not sure it applies. Also got married in Florida and didn't have to register my marriage here either, just changed my name. Confused

Pleatherandlace · 08/08/2018 20:23

Literally did this today. As others have said “legitimate” children have more rights to inherit. Strange but true. Really wasn’t that much of a faff at all

CathyEarnshawsGhost · 08/08/2018 20:26

Sorry to go off on a tangent, but, Olderthan, the double registration is automatic when a child's parents have different surnames and the father accepts paternity (or at least it used to be). If you look at old birth certificates, they don't actually have a space for the child's surname - they would automatically assume their mother's surname (with an assumption that the mother would be married and therefore it would also be the father's name).

In days gone by (it might be the same now but I don't have direct experience of it), if an unmarried father was willing to accept paternity, he had to be present at the registration and only then would the child be allowed to take his surname and have two registrations. If you look up both registrations in the BMD registers, they should share the unique registration code. Hope that makes sense.

I assume in your case that your father was present at the registration and included on your birth certificate, therefore you would be listed under both surnames automatically; you've not necessarily been reregistered, which might explain why your parents can't remember doing it.

Skyejuly · 08/08/2018 20:29

Not bothering doing this.

Lazypuppy · 08/08/2018 20:35

@TittyGolightly personally i cannot wait to take my partners name when we get married. Like PP said, every woman has a choice.

Back to the original point of the thread, we have 1 DD already, but we double barralled her surname, and we will reregister her with my partners surname once we are married. Always been the plan

LaPufalina · 08/08/2018 20:36

We're expecting our second next month (got married last year with baby DD as our bridesmaid) and we'll reregister her when we go and register DC2 Smile hopefully they'll let us do it at the same appointment!

FrazzledRockRed · 08/08/2018 20:38

To the pp saying they have one child adopted after marriage and one biological pre marriage child so it balances out. The adopted child is a child of the marriage and could push out the ‘illegitimate’ child technically.

It’s such a small job. Just get it done.

OhGodWhatTheHellNow · 08/08/2018 20:47

I was told (10 years ago) it was something we could 'opt' to do, so I have opted not to. I'm not convinced of the inheritance thing anyway and there are no 'legitimate' children to make an issue.

OhGodWhatTheHellNow · 08/08/2018 20:48

Told by the registrar whwn registering ds, that is.

TittyGolightly · 08/08/2018 20:54

Lazy puppy - why not just have a cast of his knob made out of gold and wear it round your necks?

fruitshot · 08/08/2018 21:11

We were told this last year too when we got married.
We have a son together who I need to re-register, but we both have a child from a previous relationship.
I was unmarried.
He was married before the child was born.
So goodness knows what that means for our circumstances 😬

Original poster
Faerie87 · 08/08/2018 21:22

@TittyGolightly - what an awesome idea! Might see if I can do that for my hen night! 😁

Think you might be on to something there!

OP posts:
Lazypuppy · 08/08/2018 21:50

@TittyGolightly what cause i prefer my partners surname to my own? Your logic ia very odd

TittyGolightly · 08/08/2018 21:54

Funny how many women prefer their partners’ names compared with men. Wink

TittyGolightly · 08/08/2018 21:56

If your name is so awful, why keep it and pass it on to a child. What message are you sending the child (and the world) by removing one of the names you gave them just because you’ve chosen to change yours?

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