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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is a bit extreme?

45 replies

Eliza9917 · 07/08/2018 16:44

Its a pram sign to tell people not to touch your baby.

Its for prem babies so not sure whether to think WTAF and this is ridiculously precious, or not. Surely if they couldn't come into contact with germs then they would still be in the hospital?

OP posts:

isadoradancing123 · 07/08/2018 19:24

Why would anyone want to touch someone's baby, maybe smile at them, but touch???

ProudThrilledHappy · 07/08/2018 19:25

The funny thing for me was that people only really tried to touch ds while he was very tiny and still vulnerable. Once he was about 6 - 9 months, larger and with a healthy immune system there was zero interest.

At two months they would say he’s so tiny, is he a doll, is he real, then grab his fingers and stroke his cheeks as if to check

HunterHearstHelmsley · 07/08/2018 19:26

I'm not particularly a baby toucher (iykwim) but I'd assume anyone using this was a bit of a twat.

I'd probably just laugh behind their back.

Excited0803 · 07/08/2018 19:29

@hunterhearsthelmsley - looks like you forgot to add "until I read this thread and realised the risks to babies that have just been in NICU."

ProudThrilledHappy · 07/08/2018 19:32

I'm not particularly a baby toucher (iykwim) but I'd assume anyone using this was a bit of a twat.

Or you could consider that they just spent 8 weeks in a NICU scrubbing their own hands before they even changed their baby’s nappy so are understandably a bit nervous about their child becoming sick again

Teachtolive · 07/08/2018 19:35

I actually think it's a pretty good idea. Plenty of people (usually elderly) touched my kids faces when they were infants. Just appeared in queues beside me and did it. I wasn't mad about it but i wasnt pfb and didn't stop them. If I had preemies though I'd be well pissed off.

SinkGirl · 07/08/2018 22:24

I'd assume anyone using this was a bit of a twat.

Do you have any idea what it’s like to watch your tiny baby struggling to survive, with so many lines in you’re rarely allowed to hold them?

Or to watch your almost 3 month old, finally discharged from the hospital and finally weighing 5lb, go floppy and unresponsive and have to call an ambulance? Or fight for every breath, despite being on high flow oxygen, for a fortnight?

I do. And it it’s utterly traumatic.

How dare you call people in this position “twats”? Is it so unbelievable that parents of vulnerable babies are legitimately frightened of having them hospitalised again when they’ve finally gotten them home?

whatdoyoudointhis · 07/08/2018 22:44

I had a woman remove my babies dummy on a bus journey, put it in her own mouth and then obviously I couldn't use it again after she yanked it out of his mouth and into hers.

I wouldn't have lost it otherwise, it had a clip on it

Bus was too full would have been dangerous to pick him out of the buggy

Due to that bitch a packed bus then had a screaming baby till I was within walking distance to get off and walk the rest of the way

Some people are so inconsiderate. I can see why you'd want a sign like this

NotAllIndividuals · 07/08/2018 22:59

I'm really sad that people think these signs aren't a good idea or that people who use them are idiots. The nurses in Special Care all thought the signs are a great idea for tiny babies, who are vulnerable even when they are well enough to leave hospital. Our DS was 7 weeks old and weighed a massive 4.5 lb at discharge so sorry if you think I'm being precious to say I would do anything and everything to keep people's dirty mits off him. We didn't go out much, and I only took him in a sling so I could spin him away from anyone who tried to touch him, but believe me people did. I think people are just so shocked to see such a small baby, they can't believe they're real and try to reach out. So, yeah, the signs are a good thing IMO.

CarrieBlu · 07/08/2018 23:11

I have had strangers try and touch both of my babies on numerous occasions - they were both born with LOADS of dark hair and it attracts a lot of attention. Neither were prem but I still don’t want random people touching them. The most effective thing I have found is to pop a Snoozeshade over the pram when we’re in shops or queues where we’re in close proximity to people. So far, it’s completely stopped people in their tracks. Might seem extreme/ridiculous to some, but I wouldn’t want random people touching my face so don’t see why they need to touch my babies faces either!

CarrieBlu · 07/08/2018 23:15

@NotAllIndividuals I have used a sling many times for this purpose too. Also stops other peoples’ attempts to start a ‘pass the baby’ game at family and social events!

Maelstrop · 07/08/2018 23:22

I'm not particularly a baby toucher (iykwim) but I'd assume anyone using this was a bit of a twat.

Seriously, really? Are you the type of person to rush up to an unknown dog on a lead and get bitten then say ‘Well, you shouldn’t have that dog out in public if it’s vicious’?

RoseWhiteTips · 07/08/2018 23:23

frecklesMaybe

It seems ridiculous to me. If a baby's that vulnerable the you wouldn't be out and about with then.

Quite.

RoseWhiteTips · 07/08/2018 23:24

It is twattish to have such a daft thing in close proximity.

AgathaRaisinsCat · 07/08/2018 23:33

Perhaps the wording could be better but for the vulnerable the sentiment makes sense.

Glumglowworm · 07/08/2018 23:34

I can just picture the type of person that grabs at tiny babies without asking also being the type who would ignore the sign “oh you don’t mind do you? Mummy’s just being overprotective” there’s always someone who doesn’t think rules apply to them

RoseWhiteTips · 07/08/2018 23:35

Sweeping statement time already?

NotAllIndividuals · 08/08/2018 04:04

And our DS was that vulnerable. Every time we wanted/needed to touch him we had to wash our hands and use sanitizer, meaning maybe 30 times a day because that's what it takes. It might seem hard to believe if you haven't had to do it but it's true. I pretty much didn't leave the house for 6 weeks on the advice of the neonatal outreach nurse but we did need to go out from time to time, ironically he was most at risk when we went for immunisations. I'd say try to avoid name calling if you haven't been through this, it's an incredibly stressful experience.

SinkGirl · 08/08/2018 06:37

Rose have you bothered to read the thread? Both of your comments are ridiculous if you have.

YeTalkShiteHen · 08/08/2018 06:43

It seems ridiculous to me. If a baby's that vulnerable the you wouldn't be out and about with then.

Quite

You’d have made that assumption about me and DS1 on those grounds. He had to have weekly tests after sepsis for a year, his white cell count was so low. The only time I left the house with him because I was so fucking scared of germs (he nearly died of sepsis and the low white cell count meant his immunity was virtually nil) was to take him to and from the hospital.

I panicked when random strangers tried to touch him, I panicked when anyone tried to touch him. Because a bug could have killed him.

Guess they all thought I was being precious eh?

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