AIBU to assume that if they haven't RSVP by text then they are not coming?

[MurielsBottom]

I did mention this on another thread but I thought it best to start my own thread.

DD is having a birthday party in two weeks time. We sent out invites about three weeks ago so she could invite school friends before term finished for the summer. Out of 15 invites, I've had four no's and six yeses. Four of the remaining five children had given a verbal yes to DD at school but I have not had any confirmation.

I've also had one parent ask if a younger sibling could come - that is a whole other thread though.

So, do I assume we have ten (eleven with sibling) coming or six? At the moment the booking is for ten children and I can add more up to five days before the event. I don't want to pay for more than necessary and I need to add D's onto the list.

AIBU to assume that no text means no show? Or can I rely on the verbal yeses that have been exchanged at school and add two more places to the booking?

Do you (or your dd) not have phone numbers for all these kids? Can't you just text the parents and ask?

In my experience lots of people RSVP when they happen to see you instead of texting, so if they've said yes I'd assume that's a yes.

You might even get a definite yes (or more than one) that then forgets, or got unexpected opportunity to be away, etc.
August is a nightmare time for parties. I'd just learn from it and hold next year's in July or September - maybe just inviting a close friend (whose number you have) round for birthday tea on the day.

Do have the mobile numbers for the 4 verbals. I would just text and say ‘just wanted to double check you can make it to party let me know if you can by x so I can confirm the booking’.
Then if they don’t reply you haven’t lost money.
I wouldn’t want to assume their not coming and then have the kids turn up. Pita though I don’t know why people can’t rsvp properly.

How old is DD? If infants age then I would ignore a child saying they could come. From about 9 or over I'd think the verbal confirmation would be ok.

Of course your DD is probably in the grey area in the middle :)

Unless it's the sort of party where they would do something different with more children or some numbers limitation, I wouldn't change your booking though. They really won't mind you paying for extra dc on the day if you have any.

IceCreamFace if I’ve understood correctly the parents haven’t said yes to the OP but their child has said yes to th OPs child. Might have misunderstood though?

Text or message them all to double-check as you need to know for the booking.

Gamerwidow is correct in that the invited child has said yes to my child at school. I don't go to school so don't see other parents and I haven't got contact numbers for them.

DD is 9 soon to be 10.

This is the first year we have done a bigger party as I know August birthdays are hit and miss with holidays and the break from school.

At 9-10 then I may be inclined to contact parents to confirm the verbal yeses from the playground.

At 9/10 my dd had contact #'s for her friends (or social media contacts). Have you asked your dd? Or maybe the people who did rsvp (and therefore you have their #'s) might have contact info for the other parents.

At 10, I think a verbal answer would be ok.
I'd say to DD that you need their parents contact numbers and see what she comes up with :)