To think my sister is BU

[Whatsthatgottodowithmyknob]

Friday morning she asked me if I could look after her DD for a few hours, that turned out to be the whole day, then she asked me to have her over night and on saturday. It's sunday morning and DN is still here, I haven't had anything planned this weekend so I've said yes but this isn't the first time "a few hours" turns out to be a few days

Have you called to find out where she is and when she's returning? Poor niece not knowing when her mum will bother to collect her like so much baggage

You should of said no then really.

What is she doing?

I assume she's a line parent, is Dad about at all?

Yanbu to be pissed off, just wondering if she's struggling? How old is dn? Have you even got clothes etc for her?

Say no in future, she knows she can take the piss as you keep on having DN.

Boundaries needed. Nice to be able to help but a definite pick up time has to be agreed and stuck to.

Also not nice for the poor abandoned child.

Well it's on your head. If you let her then she's going to do it forever.

Ring her and tell her to collect her child and say no in future.

If she said a couple of hours then she’s taking the piss. What is she doing? Do you know when she’s picking DN up now?

alonso are you saying OP having agreed to a couple of hours can’t complain now it’s turned into a whole weekend?

She had work on friday and normal childcare wasn't available so that's understandable but for the rest of the weekend she's been out with friends drinking or hungover. I know she's still at a friend's house at the moment. DN is 5, rarely sees her dad so he's not much help

@AlonsoTigerHeart i said yes because i would like to spend time with my DN just didn't expect to have her all weekend

If she was working and let down then fair enough you would help her out. I'd probably let that one go.

Her saying 'it's just for a couple of hours' and not turning up is not on. It's a basic lack of respect and common courtesy. As a lone parent, she probably wants to let her hair down every now and then but tell her she needs to make proper arrangements with you and not wing it with you picking up the slack. Its the not knowing when she will be back that would irritate me and make me grouchy.

Why do you enable her? Go and drop DN home and tell sis if she pulls this again she can count you out for future favours.

Start saying no and meaning it, she is taking advantage of you.
Your sister is a CF through and through.

Become unavailable from now on and it will stop.

AnneLovesGilbert
Op says she said yes to overnight

then she asked me to have her over night and on saturday.

If you don’t want people to take advantage then you say no and stop them

Yes she is being unreasonable. She is taking advantage of your good nature and you are letting her. I assume she asked for you to keep her longer so she could go out with her mates and you agreed to it.
Next time say no and mean it. I know it’s hard to change tack and stand up to your sister but if you don’t this will keep happening.

“I love (niece) but you take the piss. I don’t want her for days on end. I have enough of my own responsibilities to uphold. It’s a no.”

She'll carry on taking the piss for as long as you let her.

“As a lone parent, she probably wants to let her hair down every now and then but tell her she needs to make proper arrangements with you and not wing it with you picking up the slack.“

Absolutely. That she should want a complete break to socialise is understandable...but really, few parents, lone or otherwise, have the luxury of doing that on the spur of the moment knowing someone else will step up to the plate and run the show in their absence.
These things have to be planned and agreed in advance. There’s nothing wrong with your sister wanting a night off - disappearing for an entire weekend on a whim is something else. It’s self-centred, exploitative and inappropriate.
She needs to wise up and grow up.