To not want to go to university after my kids start school full time...

[Nottotheirstandards]

So I know I am not being unreasonable as I can do what I like. However it is starting to really grind my gears.... my she's friends are a different circle to mine but we meet up with them regularly. I get on with their wives. All good! 95% of them are university educated and come from another country. I am British. Dh is not. That is not the issue. Just back ground info.

I am always asked when meeting someone new. Did you go to university? I say no and this followed by an Oh!... So what did you do? I reply with my acceptable yet mundane job before kids.

I am a sahm. But I do work for my dh for our family business from home. I do this with 3 kids under 6 and have also helped many if these friends find their feet when moving here by putting them up or doing admin for them as English is not their first language. Yet I think they think I am beneath them because I didn't go to university... my dh did but dropped out to become a police officer bit needed up choosing a different path. I can see they think the same of my dh.

Now most of them are struggling for work as they have done niche subjects and it is of no use to them here. Most of the ladies are sahms too but do not work of any sort. No problem for me.

Yet I am seen as a British lazy woman...

I am frequently asked why I don't want to go to university after my kids are all in full time school. I pointed out I am nearing 30 and don't want to go back to the class room. I have plans to be involved more in the family business which gives me flexibility with the kids and hope to have my own business in the future and dont want to be saddled with debt. This is followed by oh what a shame....

What is wrong with people? Grrr.... Sorry just a rant. It's been a looking week.

Well, you are completely financially dependant on your DH, especially as it's a family business. So, given the fifty percent probability of divorce -YABU. But it's your risk to take.

Gro. I'm not financially dependent on him. I work for the family business and get a wage. If we did get divorce which is not on the cards then half is mine and I am able to work so would get another job. Me going to university or not will not change the fact that I work for the family business.... All the women who ask me about university actually are financially dependent on their husbands as they went to uni then never worked so have no experience and in a foreign country.

So they got a degree and never used it. Ergo you go to university then sponge off other people

I would be asking them why they don't work, and what is the point of wasting a good education.

Lonicera exactly but they don't see it like that.... like I said. No common sense

sponge off other people

You mean they're SAHMs? Bloody hell, when did British society become so atomistic? If this is the way you think, would your also argue that nannies, childminders and nursery staff should work for free? Seeing as it's not real work to look after children, I mean.

Well they sponges off of me. Most have stayed with me for weeks whilst looking for a home to rent. Meaning I fed them. Housed them and spent my free time finding them a home and doing their paper work to then be snooted at. So yes. If they are going to be snobby with me then yes they did sponge off of me

Apologies Robotic, that came across wrong. I was a SAHM for 4 years. I was getting indignant on the OP's behalf.

Anyway. I got it out of my system. I haven't actually helped any of them for a while now. They just come and visit sometimes. But the new lady the other day just triggered this rage in me!

I have cut the visits down though! They aren't as often as before...

I’d be all “what’s your degree?...oh, I didn’t know that subject was involved in your current job...it’s not? At all?” (sympathetic face).

My husband didn't go to uni, didn't get a levels either... he's now in a far more senior position than me and earns double! (Not jealous... honest )

Thanks everyone.. I feel better now! X