This is more of a WWYD rather than a AIBU, I guess.
My mum had a friend for many years. She is my godmother (henceforth known as GM). My mum used to take GM shopping etc every week (GM can’t drive). Always used to go to GM’s house and very rarely was it vice versa. My mum had a bad accident a few years back and is now pretty much house bound (can’t drive or walk far etc). GM never once came to visit her in hospital, has never actually even visited mum at home either (apart from once, and that was just to see mums new dog), and has now dropped mum like a stone. We’ve come to the conclusion it’s because mum is of no use to her anymore.
I always get GM a birthday present, anniversary present, Christmas present etc, but very rarely see her nowadays (what can I say, I’m middle aged and anti social. I very rarely go and see my own mother if I can help it). My sister used to take her shopping not long after mums accident but as she has children no longer does, as it used to literally take all day and GM expected her to also take her to a café for lunch and pay for her.
It seems so long as you go to her, and pamper to her needs she’s as nice as pie. If you don’t, then you basically go in her bad books. She’ll never come visit or call you first, it’s always expected that you’ll call and visit her. She gets the hump if you don’t do either for ages. A few years ago I thought she’d like a kindle for Christmas, she basically was not impressed and told me to take it back. Also last year I got her a book for her birthday and she complained to my sister about it. Basically said “who gets someone a book for their birthday”, which pissed me off a bit. She likes reading, it was the type of book she likes, and she used to buy me books as a child for my birthday herself!
Anyway, it was recently my birthday and she never bothered to wish me a happy birthday, let alone get me a card. Usually I’d at least get a card & gift. She’s on Facebook and WhatsApp so could have just sent me a happy birthday through that. She’s one of those annoying prolific Facebook sharing types and on it all the time, so I’m pretty sure even if she had possibly forgotten, that she’d have seen at least one of the numerous amounts of happy birthday posts I’d received.
Should I just not bother with her from now on? I appreciate that I could technically make more effort to visit her and so on, but she’s hard work and doesn’t reciprocate, and I’ve never been one to constantly go and visit other people anyway (and I don’t expect them to visit me every 5 minutes either!). I was thinking maybe I should send her just cards in the post from now on, but I’m tempted to just respond in kind and not get her a birthday card either (hers is not till December). Not sure if that’s just being petty though!