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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask when you removed baby gates?

26 replies

PatrickTheStarfish · 30/07/2018 10:40

I have a 2 year old and a 4 year old.
Pressure fit gates at the top and bottom of the stairs and kitchen doorway.
I rent so have to use pressure fit, can’t be drilling holes everywhere.

What age is best to remove the gates?
Four year old has just accidentally pulled the bottom gate off bottom of the stairs whilst getting to the toilet (he knows how to open it)

Obviously I’m worried about the four year old hurting himself doing this but equally worried that the 2 year old will start messing around on the stairs and fall down.

OP posts:
nowifi · 30/07/2018 10:42

I've just removed ours cos 2 year old DD was using them to swing off of so think they were more dangerous!

HairyToity · 30/07/2018 10:43

Just before 2nd birthday. My DD had safely mastered chairs. Just teach 2 year old to do the bumps down the stairs

HairyToity · 30/07/2018 10:44

Stairs not chairs!

ethelfleda · 30/07/2018 10:45

Watching with interest - only just put ours up and already can't wait until I can take them down!

overmydeadbody · 30/07/2018 10:46

Just before their second birthday.

They can safely navigate stairs now and are never left alone upstairs so it was the right time.

NurseryFightClub · 30/07/2018 10:46

We couldn't fix them in out rental when dd was 15 months so she learnt to go up and down them, however they were half stairs then a turning. Our new house is full flight so will be putting them on at the top in case of night time wanderings.

NannyR · 30/07/2018 10:50

I've worked in several houses where parents have no stair gates at all. You just get used to being extra vigilant and teach them how to go up and down safely as soon as they can crawl.

Shmithecat · 30/07/2018 10:52

Ds had just turned 2 when I finally took the last one (top of the stairs) down, and that was only still there in case he woke up and stumbled about in the night... he was always pretty steady on the stairs and there were never any stairgates in any other houses we stayed at so didn't see the point in keeping ours.

blueskiesandforests · 30/07/2018 10:57

Never later than about 26 months.

With dc1 we moved house when she was 20 months and I didn't put them back up in the new house. I was heavily pregnant and couldn't see my feet and she was an early walker who was very sure footed but not gung go at all by 20 months. The day I almost fell downstairs while holding her and took her with me I decided she was safer making her own way downstairs, and indeed she was.

With dc1 I toyed with not putting them up at all, but he turned out to be a bit leap before you look once he started crawling so I put them up when he was 7 months, but he was very tall and could open them by his second birthday and we took them down - he fell down the stairs just the once, aged 3, when walking about with his eyes closed pretending to be a robot ConfusedGrinGrin (he was fine, obviously)

DC3 was a climber and was caught having just climbed over the gate at the top of the stairs Shock at about 20 months (he could also climb out of his cot whilst wearing a grobag). Obviously the stair gates actually made the stairs more dangerous so we took them down.

DC3 is 7 and only dc2 has ever fallen down stairs, just that one time when messing around age 3.

By 2 it's safer to teach them to come down stairs themselves safely ime.

I on the other hand have fallen down our stairs twice

Stressedout10 · 30/07/2018 11:02

With DD about 2.5 when she could safely climb the stairs and about 18months with DS as he was climbing over them😣

Original poster
PatrickTheStarfish · 30/07/2018 11:32

Right, so I should probably take them down now then? I’ll do some practice on the stairs with the little one today

OP posts:
elliejjtiny · 30/07/2018 11:34

When youngest was about 2.5 on the stairs. We had one in the kitchen doorway until youngest could open it/climb over, I think he was 3.5.

usernotfound0000 · 30/07/2018 11:36

When DD was 2, which I think is the recommended age as they could hurt themselves more trying to climb over it.

twinkletoedelephant · 30/07/2018 11:38

Twins were nearly 2... They would push each other over and use the one on the floor as a sort of spring board to clamber over the top...

Fatted · 30/07/2018 11:43

We still have one on DS bedroom door that only gets locked a night when DH and I go to bed. I'm paranoid about them falling down the stairs on the night when I'm asleep. Also it stops them sneaking into my room in the morning. Grin DS are 3 and 5.

We took the gates off the stairs ages ago. DS2 must've just turned 2. One broke and we couldn't be bothered replacing it. We moved the remaining one to their bedroom.

Raisinbrain · 30/07/2018 11:47

We stopped using gates when DS was about 2. I would have stopped earlier TBH as he was climbing the stairs confidently by 9 months but DH was worries. Having a gate at the top of the stairs is dangerous. You're more likely to trip over it than anything else.

HarrietSchulenberg · 30/07/2018 11:55

When the smallest one started climbing over them, aged about 2. Seemed a bit pointless, not to mention dangerous, to keep them but I'd got used to them by then and kept automatically reaching to open them for ages afterwards.

user1471426142 · 30/07/2018 11:56

We’ve still got them at 26 months. My little girl was an early walker and is very capable and careful on the stairs 99% if the time. But she can be quite gung ho and I’d be worried about her deciding to jump down them which she has tried before. She has no fear, is jumping on and off anything at every opportunity and I wouldn’t put it past her to try and jump from the top. I can’t see our top one going until she’s out of her jumping phase.

Batmanthedude · 30/07/2018 11:57

We removed the stairs one when he swung on it as dangerous about 2.5 but he had mastered the stairs by then.he is 4 and still has one over bedroom door as small landing and steep stairs. Be knows how to open it but has to be relatively awake to open it

Original poster
PatrickTheStarfish · 30/07/2018 11:57

I have thought of the gate being dangerous at the top of the stairs. I only ever lock that one at night because I’m worried one of them would stumble down the stairs if they get out of bed half asleep (which they often do)
Not sure what to do about that. I could put a gate on their bedrooms but I don’t think they’d like feeling trapped in.
Or am I over worrying? Two year olds bedroom is right next to the stairs so I’m more concerned about him than the 4 year old

OP posts:
IdontunderstandPicasso · 30/07/2018 12:01

I still one on my 3year olds bedroom door. We have steep stairs, she cannot climb over it. She doesn’t seem to mind. However she was a late Walker so isn’t as agile as other 3 year olds yet. She is also pretty silly still and if she came out during the night I know she would cause havoc!

newartriotstar · 30/07/2018 12:05

My two are 6 and 3. They're both fine on the stairs but their bedrooms are right next to to very steep (Victorian terrace) stairs which is a worry when they both wander around a lot at night/the early hours still for toilet etc. To put my my mind at rest we have one at the top of the stairs but only put it onto the fixings at night time if that makes sense? That would probably be easier with a pressure fitted one I would have thought? During the day it goes behind the door in one of their bedrooms.

Jammysod · 30/07/2018 14:27

Just do it when it's right for you & don't feel like you have to justify anything. My son is nearly 4 & we still have ours at the bottom of the stairs, I'll move it when it's looking like he can climb over.

Lavende · 30/07/2018 14:29

After the second child learned how to climb them anyway.

GreenMeerkat · 30/07/2018 14:30

Mine are 3 and 4 and I still have one between the living room and the kitchen to stop them running in and out while I'm cooking/oven is on. I'm expecting another now so I suspect it will remain in place for a while