AIBU to ask which is the most neutral term dinner, supper or tea?

[ConfusedWife1234]

AIBU to ask which the most neutral term for dinner/supper/tea is? I am not a native speaker and I have been told that your usage of the word says a lot about ethnic ancestry, social class, if your are from the UK, US or another English speaking country, part of the country and so on. Which is the most neutral term and when do I use which one?

Talkstotrees.

You have made my day thanks.

Lots of people get the munchies after the allocated breakfast dinner and tea. So supper is for the munchy snackers!

Like me.

BTW when I invite people... lots of people... how is this called. This is always called dinner, right?

For most people, yes.
(Chanel's post above sounds like an exception, in wealthier circles.)

This class system with military/clergy/civilians existed in Britain. Really? I was ridiculed by native speakers for thinking so so I started believing that it never existed in the English speaking world.
BTW was the king the head of the military and the head of the church at the same time as in other European countries.

The Three Estates is primarily a French model, but it's commonly used in basic school teaching of medieval history here, and it has some official recognition as described here: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estates_of_the_realm#United_Kingdom

@manaaftermidnight Now I am a bit shocked because i was ridiculed by a bunch of people for saying just that... and started believing I said something really stupid. Might I ask you something: Are there people in Britain who have been given peerage for military achievement? Because that it was happened in a lot of other countries but I was ridiculed for saying people get titles for military achievement, so I thought maybe Brits were given titles for other reasons.

penny,

Just go with the flow and decide on how your appetite is working at the time.

The Fourth Estate is not doing us many favours at the moment IMV anyway!

@FraxinusExcelsior....i can assure you that just because I call a meal a certain name, I do not see myself as any better than anyone else!

Who would tell their kids to GET IN HERE NOW FOR YOUR SUPPER?

I must be living in some kind of bubble, but it's tea here (outside of school hols, and anything goes there really).

Supper? Sounds like a pact with the devil or something lol.

Great entertaining trivial thread which is what we need right now since there are mad prepping and trans threads and all kinds of angst going on.

Nice to de stress about things that are funny and amusing for some.

The silly season in other words!

OP - if you go to any hotel, there is a breakfast menu, a lunch menu and a dinner menu.

Most of Britain would think of it like this.

There is no “tea menu” is there?

“Tea” means a cup of tea. Otherwise it means “afternoon tea” - sandwiches, scones, other cakes, etc, taken with a pot of tea about 4pm.

However, some northerners have confused afternoon tea with dinner - now they call it “tea” and this basically means anything you eat as as a last meal. But I think people who call it “tea” tend to eat about 5pm - eg. this suits children or the elderly better. Often it’s chips or spaghetti or something quick like that.

You don’t have to be drinking tea when you are “having your tea,” if you see what I mean.

Im Scottish it's breakfast, lunch and tea where I'm from and supper is a snack before bed

I freely admit to being weird.....

We have breakfast, lunch and:

• if lunch was a cooked meal, we have tea - sandwiches/omelette/something light
• if lunch was a sandwich etc., we have dinner - a cooked meal

Supper is custard creams and a pot of tea

Munchies occur throughout the day

I'm in Scotland & for me it's

Breakfast
Lunch
Dinner

Supper is what kids have before bed - I don't know any adult who has supper on a regular basis

What are munchies actually?

If you “get the munchies” you will just nibble on whatever there is eg. crisps or carrots or whatever you can find.

Are there people in Britain who have been given peerage for military achievement? Yes. Duke of Wellington is the historical one that comes to mind. The wonderfully named Sir Jock Stirrup, former head of the armed forces, was given a peerage on his retirement. Modern practice seems to be to create life peerages so (in theory) the recipient can continue to use their knowledge in the service of the country by sitting in the House of Lords, whereas the Duke of Wellington was given a hereditary peerage which was handed down from father to eldest son.

OP - if you go to any hotel, there is a breakfast menu, a lunch menu and a dinner menu. Most of Britain would think of it like this

Actually Zadig no, if you did a bit if research you'd find that actually the majority of the UK
(namely North of England, North and South Wales, the English Midlands, Scotland and Northern Ireland) call their meals breakfast dinner and tea.

However, some northerners have confused afternoon tea with dinner
Officially the sneeriest post of the entire thread

Confused: I don't know if it still happens, but in the 19th century Nelson was made a viscount and Arthur Wellesley became the first Duke of Wellington.

Ahh OP, I hear you. It's a minefield at times. Here's a list my German pal and I came up with when having this exact same chat, copied and pasted. (disclaimer - I am Scottish, living in Scotland and grew up working class but with an abiding love of Jeeves and Wooster. I am probably now middle class)

Breakfast: First meal of day. Can range from cereal / bread products to full cooked breakfast with various meats and eggs. Generally does not involve cheese

Elevenses: Eaten at around 11am. Usually with cup of tea, would consist of light snack or perhaps a cake.

Brunch: Bastardisation of a meal. Can actually be eaten later than traditional lunch (e.g. up to 2pm), if it's your first meal of the day. E.g. a hungover brunch. May involve American-type foods such as waffles with syrup, or can be savoury. Smashed avocado on rye bread is a stereotypical hispter brunch.

Lunch OR Dinner: Midday meal. Lunch always means midday meal. Dinner is more fluid. Schools will often refer to "school dinners". If being referred to as dinner, it is generally hot and the largest meal of the day. However lunch can range from sandwiches to a full meal too. A "roast dinner" can be served anything from midday to evening depending on preference, and is often a celebratory type meal or eaten on a Sunday.

Afternoon tea: Eaten midafternoon. Consists exclusively of small finger sandwiches, cakes and scones. "modern" twists include tiny sausage rolls etc. Cups of tea accompany this. Not a standard meal. You would either invite people over for this or go out for it.

High tea: subtly different from afternoon tea, though also served in the afternoon. Includes hot food as well as afternoon tea fare (this may be a Scottish differentiation). Sometimes has childish connotations, as may be eaten approx 4pm - as children's main afternoon meal, they will be in bed later.

Tea: Evening meal (if you aren't in the South). Standard hot food. Can be the main meal of the day. If a child asks you if they can go to a friend's for tea, they mean t he meal. If a friend asks you over for tea, check what time - if they say evening, they plan to feed you.
Is also known as Dinner.

Dinner: eaten later, usually after 7pm. You might go out for dinner, or hold a dinner party. Usually has multiple courses.

Supper: a late evening meal, before bed. Usually more casual than dinner. Can vary from light snack food to a proper hot meal. Posh people might invite you for a "kitchen supper" - this means they plan to feed you in a relaxed manner in the kitchen, not in the dining room. They might invite you round for 8pm and feed you closer to 9.30.

___

You asked about "munchy". The munchies are feelings of hunger, outside of a standard meal time. You might not have eaten enough, you might have smoked too much cannabis. I

f you ever find yourself somewhere selling a "munchy box", under no circumstances purchase it. Your arteries will thank you.

Tea time means food here.

Getting the munchies means needing a snack of some sort, and of course also means snacking on something outside of the designated rules!

Everyone gets the munchies at one time or another. I actually love that expression.

I am a northerner but have travelled a lot and find most of my fellow northerners aren’t actually that rigid with their terms
So breakfast first, followed by lunch or dinner, and tea or dinner for the evening meal. Supper is a snack before bed.
I happily use the term dinner for midday as well as evening meal and most people I know would understand dependent on the context.
If you want the absolute most neutral terms I would say they were
Lunch for midday and dinner for evening meal.
Even most northerners I know would say dinner if the were going to a restaurant for a nd evening meal for instance. I tend to say tea if I am going out with the kids say around 5 to eat.

Oh, and the munchies is stuff you eat when not hungry. Just fancy 'something'.
Usually chocolate, biscuits, crisps or nuts.
Rarely carrot sticks, cucumber batons or hummous. Although I could munchie on hummous right now....... Cancel hummous from that list 😁

Munchies are when you get hungry but it’s not a meal time.

Dinner is the safest term.

Assuming we are referring to an early evening meal - tea is working class, dinner is lower middle class, and supper is a bit higher on the middle class scale.

I love munchies. Having had tea earlier, sometimes need something else a little later. That is the munchies.

What harm is that?

I grew up (Midlands/Northern MC) with 'dinner' for a hot meal and 'lunch' for a lighter one (soup/sandwiches etc) and 'tea' in the evening except when parents' friends were over, in which case 'dinner'. We had 'supper' as a snack before bed (evening meal was generally between 5 and 6).

I now live abroad and use 'lunch' always and 'dinner' or 'supper' for the evening meal - the later and lighter it is, the more likely I am to say 'supper'. We rarely eat before 7 and don't have 'supper' as in a snack before bed.

Don't forget "brinner" BTW. This is another portmanteau word standing for "breakfast for dinner", in other words a meal resembling a typical cooked breakfast - bacon, egg, sausage, beans etc. but served as your evening meal. Or is that just in our house?

Also I have just remembered when typing this that when I was a child some of the places we stayed when we went on seaside holidays would advertise that they provided bed, breakfast and evening meal so that was a very neutral term for it.

On tea, the Germand have an odd delusion that we (Brits) always have 'five ö'clock tea'. Called that. I get the tea stereotype (pots of tea-the-drink and crustless cucumber sandwiches, etc), but where did the five o'clock bit come from?

Some Germans say Abendbrot for the evening meal even when it's hot, because the ideal of hot meal at lunchtime and bread/cheese/sausage in the evening is so embedded in the German psyche. It's not a class thing, though. (Interestingly, however, there are class differences in what Germans call their living room and sofa. Not so different from the Brits).