Friday Night Taxi AIBU?

[JupiterWeb]

So bit of back story, my partner and I have been together for almost 5 years, engaged own a house etc. We very rarely go out for the evening and if we do we usually do together. Well tonight is his managers leaving do so he is out and has been drinking since lunchtime! It's already 23:15... I am not a massive fan of driving let alone in the dark! But he is insisting that when he rings I need to go pick him up at whatever time that may be!!! AIBU as this is just a one off? Or should he of made his own arrangements!! Like staying at said manager/friends house!

As an occasional thing, I'd do it. Every weekend? Not so much.

So you have to do an hour's round trip because he is too disorganised to plan a way home is there none he could share a cab with even partway?

The issue here is he is dictating that OP must pick him 'whatever time it may be'. What if that's 2am? 4am?

He is being a twat. I hop you didn't pick him up.

Before 11 I might be persuaded to go if DH asked properly and wasn't a dick "insisting" I pick him up. Later than that, not a chance.

On here it's no surprise to me at all why so many people end up divorced. Why wouldn't you pick him up, you'll survive one night of staying up late, it's not like it's a regular occurrence. Surely you'd want him to have a good night out without the cost or hassle of a taxi when he rarely goes out on his own.

I hope you did pick him up. It's a one off and he did ask you in advance.
Next time make it clear that if he wants picking up before, say, midnight it's fine but you won't be staying up just in case. ie you'll collect him at midnight but he has to call you at 11.30 to say where.

I would pick him up if it was before about 1.3am. After that I would be really tired and wouldn’t feel safe to drive anyway. Having said that, I might be a bit less happy to do so if he ‘insisted.’ I always think it is rude when others think their time is more valuable than yours and leave you sitting around waiting for them

That should be 1.30am

You must be bloody joking. Taxi!

We pick each other up any time till 12.30 after that it's a taxi home.

I always offer to drop off and collect my DP when he has a work night out, but I wouldn't like it if he demanded a lift!

Up until 11, OK if asked nicely.
After that, or if bullied (as in insisting) absolutely not. What an inconsiderate piece of work he seems to be.

If there was a set time then may be ok but if he's expecting you to wait until until he's ready to come home then thats taking the piss. What if hes out until 4/5 am? If he is he might as well wait for trains / busses to start running!

But this is mute cos it's already the next day! What happened in end op?

I don't drink and I'm phenomenally tight arsed so I would go and pick up my DH after a night out . (Spend £50 on a taxi? Feck that!)
Maybe the "insisting" tine is because he's had a drink and he's worried about getting home /not having the money.

I would do it , but I would be expecting to be treated like royalty the next day

It’s a one off!

Oh for goodness sake just pick him up - my OH and I pick each other up all the time from nights out, airports, parties, late work meetings - at all times of the day and night - that’s what a partnership is - you help each other out - otherwise what’s the point

This ^ 100%

Honestly, Mumsnet is some other world where everyone gets up in arms of posters dare to mention so much as making their OH a cup of tea

Back in the real world, being together isn't about arguing that you shouldn't have to do things for another adult. It's about working together.

As grown adults in a loving committed relationship you should have sorted this out long before the day with a civilised discussion. His attitude is appalling and I'd be thinking about what it says about mutual respect and love towards you. As others have pointed out, in a normal respectful relationship this wouldn't be any issue because he would have dealt with it differently.

What Oysterbabe said