To think there's no point in collect & pay or the CMS at all

[theduchessstill]

Ex has paid me not a penny, ever, as he thinks that because I earn more he shouldn't have to. His fist payment was due in March and he of course didn't pay. We had to give him chances apparently before we could switch to collect and pay, which should mean they get the money from him. They finally authorised the change and first payment was due on Monday. I didn't check my account as it's hardly a life-changing amount (£15.60 per week for two dc) but got a letter today saying I would not be receiving it as he hadn't paid it to them. WTF? What is the point in it - I thought they would be taking it directly from his wages but if it relies on him handing it over he will never ever do so.

He has been in a better paid, albeit temporary job over the last 6 weeks, and the dc are going to get nothing whatsoever from it. The job has also meant he's not had his usual contact, so more childcare costs for me. Fucking outrageous What a useless organisation.

Took ds1 uniform shopping today and spent £60 (not got shoes, trousers or full PE stuff yet) and dropped him to ex's after for ex to pat him on the head and say 'uniform for secondary school - exciting!' and then throw a strop when I said the uniform would be coming home with me. I don't think he has a concept that these things cost money. AIBU to think he and CMS are twats of the highest order??

Are you sure it's collect & pay and not direct pay? It sounds like it's direct pay which is him paying them, they wouldn't need him to pay them for collect and pay as it's automatically done

Actually, for us the CMS were pretty darn good when DP’s ex was his usual utterly manipulative gaslighting twattish self over DSD’s maintenance. The case manager put him in his place when he submitted the original court order regarding shared care as proof that DSD wasn’t actually full time resident with us. Despite DSD having lived with us for 13 months (the charming little anus tried to delay and stall things before we were forced to contact CMS- DSD was suicidal and took an overdose over his abusive behaviour). They pointed out to him that submitting false evidence is a criminal offence, likewise not transferring child benefit for 5 months is benefit fraud... they also made him pay arrears backdated to the initial application.
I realise our experience isn’t yours, but they can darn good when it comes to abusive shitbags. You may have noticed that I have a low opinion of this man, by the way...