To think he will never change

[Firsttimemum892]

Ok so been with partner nearly 6 years recently had a baby. The relationship was really doomed from the start when he was messaging another girl about 4 months into the relationship , sending eachother explicit pictures etc. I believed he wouldn’t do it again and stayed with him about two years later he done it again with a different girl I did leave this time for a few months but returned, probably my biggest regret.Ever since then there has been dodgy stuff going on I know he regularly views the same women’s social media pages and likes photos etc (I know this might sound really Petty to some if it wasn’t for his past I wouldn’t make such a huge deal over these things) this happened a lot when I was pregnant so I confronted him he apologised and removed a few specific girls off his social media all fine. Last night it popped up on my Instagram feed that he liked a girls photo and it was the same girl I’ve had an issue with in the past the photo is from more than two years ago so he had a really good nosey at her profile and then liked the most explicit picture of her. I know this all sounds ridiculous and I know I am probably going to get “roasted” for being so pathetic over someone liking a photo but it really hurts me and he knows this ! I confronted him he said it must have been an accident (I know ) he then admitted he was looking but said he never talks to anybody and would never actually cheat. I feel seriously unhappy in this relationship but I am on maternity leave and feel stuck I literally have no where to go and until I return to work no financial stability,I just want some opinions please this isn’t reasonable behaviour is it? Or am I being over the top ? If I tell him I don’t want to be with him he has the power to kick me out so do I grit my teeth until I am back at work and get my own place ? I am so sad for my baby as I know this relationship isn’t going to last and I really wanted us to have a stable home/family.

Sorry but it is not going to work. I’d make plans to work out an exit strategy.

If getting back with him was probably your biggest regret and you feel that unhappy and stuck then you should definitely leave him. And tbh it doesn't matter if other people would be okay with him doing that - the fact is you're not, that can't be doing anything for your health. I'm assuming he's working so while you're on your maternity you should maybe check out council/social housing, you don't have to tell him before you've got anything sorted. FWIW i don't think you're being over the top. Hope you manage to get something sorted x

I don't think you're being over the top at all, I would have dumped him a long time ago for this behaviour!

You forgave him and had a child with him, yet he is still looking over your shoulder. Do you really want more of the same for the next 20 years. If you go now - your baby will never remember you splitting up.

He is a total pig and no, he won't change. Why would he ? Use your time now to strategise for when you leave. If you don't he will remain as he is.

He doesn't want to change, in your situation I would start making exit plans and try to coparent as well as you can.
Much better to find someone you love and trust instead of someone who makes you feel like he does.

Thanks everybody I know what I need to do just needed to hear it x

Good luck. It wont take long before you feel much better and are wondering how you bore it for so long. Take your time. Remember he is completely untrustworthy. He does not love you. He does not care about you or yiyr feelings and a baby will make him worse. When you tell him time's up and he snivels and bleats that he loves you and will change, he wont. He will be worse to punish you for trying to claim back your life. Plan well.