To get my grandma's driving license revoked? And how?

[jilldoyoulikeowls]

Sorry, just hoping for some traffic as quite worried.

My grandma is recently widowed and we live rurally. She has diminishing sight and has recently been diagnosed with cataracts (the appointment at the hospital not until early Sep to see what will be done about them).

She is very independent and adamant she will continue to drive, and at her appointment at the opticians she insists they never mentioned anything about her stopping driving until they have been removed.

She has bumped a cyclist as he was in the shaded part of the road and she couldn't see him, and she can't see the remote control if on a worktop of dark colour, and can't make out anything if it's not in bright light.

She has also mounted the kerb.

I know I could simply take her keys (I don't know where she has stashed her spare though) but what else can I do?

The GP and opticians won't entertain me as it breached confidentiality.

I've stressed how dangerous she is. But she won't listen.

She has a problem with her foot this week so I know she is off the road for now.

I have offered to do all shopping etc etc. But will be quite an undertaking to ensure she's out and about as much as she is. But what other options are there.

Do I report to the police? DVLA?

OP - not sure of specifics but be prepared for the DVLA approach to be somewhat self- managing. For example, an initial letter may ask her to book an appointment for an eye test or with her GP but I am not sure what they do if the driver doesn't do this. Also not sure whether the driver is then expected to report the results of the eye test themselves. My impression is that it's not a perfect safety net.

If you can raise it with your DG, could you perhaps ask her how she would feel if a driver with eyesight/ health problems ran you over?

Well done on trying to tackle it. Can't be easy....

For now take the air out of her tyres.

It's not a perfect safety net at all. Older people or those with sight or general ill health issues are left to self-report as it's seen as being nannying or taking away that person's independence to do otherwise, when it's actually a public safety issue. A car is a weapon in the hands of someone you can't see properly - a lethal weapon that can kill - and with the school summer holidays beginning this week there are going to be DC all over the streets for the next six weeks.

We reported FIL to DVLA last year when he refused to give up driving (poor reaction speed, failing eyesight etc)
They sent him a form to complete, so you may want to look out for that!
Luckily FIL couldn't see it properly so asked us to fill in for him. We discussed the answers so he knew what we'd written but I have no doubt he would have been lenient with the truth had he been able to complete it himself.

Even then, when the letter came though telling him not to drive he still needed us to cut up his license and telling him his insurance was now void for him to begrudgingly accept the car should be sold.

It is difficult, but you are doing the right thing.

You have my full sympathy here. it’s a decision you can’t take lightly, but ultimately its one you have to think of others too.

Now over 10 years ago I followed my late grandpa home for over 3 miles, main A road, very wide with a cycle lane each side easily 1.5m alone. He not only mounted the kerb 4-5 times, nearly took out a post box, and a couple of lamp posts. I let him pull into his drive, parked around the corner and rang my mum for a chat. We both agreed there an then. He shouldn’t be in the road. He was as much a danger to himself as anyone else, his car had constantly been “hit by others”.

I walked in 20 minutes later, as I used to see him nearly every 2-3 days, had my own keys to his house anyway and kept an older car in the garage, which was large enough to have most of the house in it. A half hour later I sneaked out the front and put a steering lock on wheel of his car. A week or so later, I moved the car into the rear of the property under a porch, back with the lock on and there it remained for nearly a year. Where after 3 months of moving the car back and forwards a meter or two he gave up and disconnected the battery.

Whilst he didn’t like it, I think he accepted it.

But for a man who literally grew up and built cars for a living it was the start of a slope of decline. It was the biggest decision I had to make up to that point, there were bigger ones to make with him later on, but that’s another thread.

Disconnecting the battery will work in the interim too. Depending on how bad her eyesight is she might drive on a flat.

You could also have a chat with the local police mentioning the accidents. Sometimes they'll go round and have a chat with her and see if she'll agree to stop driving as a talk from someone official works better than a talk from family.

I find it astonishing that GPs and opticians hide behind patient confidentiality in these cases. Have they learnt nothing from that German Wings crash when the doctors the pilot had mental health issues but did nothing?

I'm surprised the cyclist hasn't reported it actually and then the police would take action for careless driving at least - but there again the police won't always do anything if the cyclist isn't injured.

Thanks all for the advice and info.

@StopPOP and anyone else who might be in the same situation - DVLA have advise the best approach is to email.

The email will be confidential, it will generate a questionnaire and will contact the GP to get a confirmation of whether someone is safe to drive (in GP opinion)

The email should detail if possible

Full name
DOB
full address.

The email address is

eftd at DVLA. GSI. GOV. UK

the lady at DVLA said this would be totally anonymous in case anyone else is in my position and hesitant to call.

Thanks again all, a push in the direction I knew I needed to go. Much appreciated, I have now emailed.

@jellypeanuts I know. I've tried to be anonymous but I've really campaigned for her to relinquish her keys so they will know it's me.

Better a few months of grumpy family than another death for us all to grieve, or a death for another family to grieve.

Perhaps she'll be back on the road post cataract operation, or she'll be kept off the road for good. Am sure at some point the family/she will thank me. Well, hopefully!

@jilldoyoulikeowls I did the email about my FIL who had dementia. MIL clicked immediately that it was me, even though it is anonymous - I'd pushed a lot for him to give up.

I swore blind it wasn't and they came to the conclusion it was perhaps a nurse in clinic they had seen. I didn't let on that a health professional would have had to tell them they were informing.

So if she guesses you can either come clean, or be ready with a deflection story such as someone to her numberplate when she mounted the curb/it was the cyclist etc etc. And stick to it.

With my FIL he then went with MIL to see his GP to discuss it, at which point the GP said he would tell the DVLA when asked that FIL was not fit to drive. And that was an end to it. If you went with your nan to her GP and shared how many curb mounting/cyclist incidents there had been you would likely have the same outcome.

Just posted on another thread about someone driving with MS. Point out to your family that The fine for not informing DVLA of conditions that affect driving ability is £1,000. Not to mention her insurance would probably be invalid. If she had caused someone serious harm or death do they think the judge would say "poor old soul needs her car for shopping & seeing her friends" or would they remove her licence, impose a huge fine & possibly a custodial sentence.

Sorry meant to add that you have done absolutely the right thing OP

I reported my Dad, then aged 80, to the DVLA 5 years ago for similar reasons. He got sent to his GP who just asked him if he thought he was fit to drive and my dad said he was.

Interestingly, I was with him only yesterday and he drove the pair of us to the cemetery (to visit Mum's grave). I let him do this so that I could see how he did - and it's only about half a mile with all left turns (he deliberately drives a different way back that is all left turns).

He never got out of 2nd gear and plainly could not see whether anything was coming at the junctions - I had to tell him he could move. In the car park, he kept asking me if anyone as behind him - as a large group of mourners passed directly behind the car.

I'm going to report him again...

Taking a spark plug out should do the trick!

VickyEadie I reported FIL after a similar drive, where he also mistook a 20mph circle painted on the road for a roundabout.

We made sure MIL went to the GP with him, to avoid a similar scenario to your Dad's. Her information to the GP about what his driving was really like, compared to his 'it's fine, I'm very careful, no accidents' was what swung it.

I agree with the PPs who say unplug something then speak to the garage and get the car written off, we had this plan in place for my Granny.

VickyEadie's post is terrifying.

I had this problem a few years ago. I was at an appointment with PILs when the consultant diagnosed FIL with dementia. I already had major concerns about his standard of driving (had stopped my dc going in his car). I asked the consultant about driving, in front of the PIL, and he said that FIL must give up. Well, all hell broke lose that evening. DH supported me but his mother and DH's 2 brothers would not accept it. I was criticised then ostracised. FIL drove a couple more times then quietly gave up. My relationship with the whole family never recovered. However I did the right thing, morally and legally, and would do the same again to protect other road users.

Sit her down, and read this to her. Over, and over again until she gets it.

lifeasawidower.com/2014/12/22/tell-them/

Well done OP. It’s a difficult situation.

you have totally done the right thing. Professionals have a duty to report patients driving against advice if they know the patient themselves hasnt done so. GP etc cant give you any info but can listen to your concerns. I cant believe that any professional hearing what you have said wouldnt agree she needs to stop driving until cataract op (and even afterwards would need eye test given her macular degeneration)

Also previous poster "German Wings crash when the doctors the pilot had mental health issues but did nothing?" - please, not on same level at all. Mental Health issues do not stop you being able to do a high functioning job well. There was no indication that would happen, and this kind of attitide just makes those with mental health problems less likely to seek help

To be blunt just ask her if she's fine hitting a child or pregnant woman?

Have had to do similar with family and BIL licence was suspended while he underwent checks for a fainting spell last year.

Glad you contacted the DVLA- imho ALL drivers should be referred for a hospital appointment for eye tests and physicals to continue driving and also to stop selling powerful motors above or below certain ages.

Btw - was hit by a car driven by a older adult and got off lucky - my neighbour wasn't.

Just a thought - have you checked if her licence is still in date? We were worried about broaching this with our mum but when we checked her licence it had expired which made it much easier.

Just done the online referral of my Dad. Why wait?!