Friends baby shower

[Freakedout89]

One of my very good friends is pregnant, this isn't her first child. She's had a few pregnancies but I'm wary of saying how many so as not to out either of us.

I've recently found out that some mutual friends are planning her a baby shower. A baby shower she doesn't want! She hates being the centre of attention, she thinks it is only appropriate for only the first pregnancy (her view which is entirely reasonable for her).
I have said to the mutual friends that she isn't so keen on having a shower, but was told basically to suck it up and leave them to organising it (regardless that I'm one of her closest friends and they aren't), I've never had a baby shower or children so I have no idea how to handle this.
AIBU to tell her to give her the heads up? Or should I keep quiet

Tell her. If this was me I’d be furious.

I'd tell her, then leave it to her to handle and be unavailable for the actual shower if it goes ahead.

I'd tell her. I hate it when people don't listen.

I’d warn her too.

Tell her.

Tell her and then when she next sees these other friends she can drop into the conversation that she hates them!

Tell her.

This would be my worst nightmare, please tell her!

I had this happen (and had a thread here at the time). Surprise one organised when I said I hated them. You have to tell her, either she can tell them to stop or not go if they insist.

Yeah I'd tell her too. I didn't really want one for my first for pretty much the same reasons as your friend, but my friend organised a surprise lunch with just a small group of v close friends and family. That was nice, no silly games and no obligation to bring gifts.

I definitely don't want one for my second (incoming within weeks now). I've told DH and my Mum that if they get a whiff of another surprise they're to shut it down, nicely. One that's not too 'showery' I can cope with, I enjoyed it and appreciated the
effort and thought. Two I think is really inappropriate, particularly as it's within a short space of time (under three years). I've not long attended one for a friend of mine who was having her fifth child and has had a shower each time....

Without going into too much details my wife had a similar situation; Didn't want a baby shower, but her friends wanted to throw her one.

As a compromise they did what they called a "baby sprinkle" it was basically just an afternoon tea with just a few close friends, no baby gifts.
Do you think something like that might work here?

Of course you should tell her! Amazed you need to ask quite honestly.