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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I'm not an u neighbour

24 replies

m0therofdragons · 25/07/2018 23:20

Neighbour is having a big extension built and we accepted there would be a fair bit of disruption. We have to drive over their drive to get to ours (odd cul de sac corner arrangement) so technically they are not supposed to block our drive. With the work it's hard for them not to so we have not complained. However they have got seemingly more pissed off with us. We've asked them to move in the morning a number of times so we can get our car out - they can see the car is there so it's bizarre this request surprises them.

We asked if they know it'll be blocked to give us a heads up and we'll park accordingly (other end of the road so not ideal with 3 dc). This heads up has come at 7am as in "you need to move your car now" and then they were annoyed I insisted I got dressed first (was in my nightdress!).

Today dh popped home for lunch and drive was blocked but they had the cement mixer set up in the centre of our driveway (cement now splattered up front window!) and the scaffolding was also on our driveway pushed up against our front wall. Dh has a word and they insisted they'd move it in a minute. Dh had to return home 2 hours later and it was still there. When Dh spoke to builders the neighbour came out rolled her eyes at Dh and then blanked him speaking to the builder about something unconnected.

We've not complained and only politely asked for them not to use our drive without asking! I'm so done with being nice. Am I really supposed to put up with this?

OP posts:
LeighaJ · 25/07/2018 23:24

Wow your neighbours are rude and cheeky AF.

flumpybear · 25/07/2018 23:26

Yeo wouldn't put up with that either - start laying down the law - CF

LineRunner · 25/07/2018 23:28

No, tell them enough is enough, you've been more than accommodating and they've been incredibly rude and they can fuck off from your drive, your property, and your peaceful enjoyment of your home.

Drink vodka first. It helps to dampen down the British politeness.

m0therofdragons · 25/07/2018 23:29

They're acting like we are so I'm actually questioning myself. I'm a nice person and plan to live here for a long time. Honestly if she'd popped over with a bottle of wine or just knocked and apologised and explained they're struggling with the space please can they use our driveway I'd probably have said yes. One stupidly hot day I came home and the builders were clearly struggling in the heat so I got them all ice cold lemonades. I really am not a bitch.

OP posts:
keyboardkate · 25/07/2018 23:41

Neighbours can be from hell. There is no telling when they will turn on you.

I would be like you OP, considerate and obliging, knowing it could be my turn next to do major building works.

But blocking you in and being absolute oddballs about the disruption they are causing you is just not on.

I think you need to put on your big girl knickers, and DH needs to don a Superman outfit.

Best of luck. It ain't easy dealing with such people, but do not let yourself be walked on either.

LineRunner · 25/07/2018 23:43

I'm very polite too, but will not put up up with rolling of eyes.

Bahhhhhumbug · 25/07/2018 23:50

Ya u for not doing a diagram op lol. But seriously l don't fully understand are they parking on their drive which you have right of access over or actually on your drive. Either way they have no right to get arse and l would stop being so obliging. They are trying to embarrass you into not complaining as they know they're in the wrong.

Bahhhhhumbug · 25/07/2018 23:51

arsey

DontTouchTheMoustache · 25/07/2018 23:55

I'd assume any further items left on your drive are a gift and take them inside...

Ok probably wouldn't but YANBU they sound awful. Sorry no helpful advice really just sympathy

m0therofdragons · 26/07/2018 00:01

They have a skip on their drive which I can now just about get by to get on my drive - previous position meant dh's small car fitted but not my 7 seater. When they emptied it they moved it over a bit so can just about get big car on. They turn up every morning and park a big van across the entrance to the drive so I have to ask them to move each time. When dh popped home for lunch today the cement mixer was in the middle of our drive (which explains how we had cement up our front window today and last week one day (presumably they assumed we were at work). Our driveway has posts either side and is at a right angle to neighbour's so it's clear who's is whose.

OP posts:
m0therofdragons · 26/07/2018 00:07

Apologies for drawing - not my skill set. Hopefully it gives an idea though.

OP posts:
RebootYourEngine · 26/07/2018 00:08

You are not being unreasonable.

How much longer is the building works expected to last?

KeepServingTheDrinks · 26/07/2018 00:09

They need to clean your window then, don't they!

Perhaps suggest you 'swap' drives for the duration? You park on theirs and can get in and out, and they can use your drive when there isn't ruddy great machinery blocking it!

p.s. If you're going to add a diagram, you need to check out JennaTools and her thread. That woman has raised the bar on here when it comes to diagram-age

MrsEricBana · 26/07/2018 00:09

I feel your pain . You don't want to get into any sort of dispute is the only thing I'd say as will make it very unpleasant to live next to them and may affect you if you try to sell. I am not good at being calm in such situations so I'd write down what you're happy with and what you need from them (NOT blocking you in!!) and give it to them (and keep copy). Just don't let them make you think it's your fault as you've done nothing wrong.

Teabag37 · 26/07/2018 00:14

I think you are going to get some comments about the shape of the road/cul-de-sac !!

m0therofdragons · 26/07/2018 00:16

I know @Teabag37 I didn't quite realise how rude my road is. This is why I didn't post a diagram to begin with and why I've put off posting due to my inability to draw. Plus it's midnight. Blush

OP posts:
keyboardkate · 26/07/2018 00:18

Absolute phallic symbol there, bravo!

Mutters and moves away from the keyboard, as that is not helping anything really.

StaplesCorner · 26/07/2018 00:22

OP sorry but you are not going to get away with that diagram. That's about the worst one we've had for months. Only saving grace is its like a penis so we can all snigger at it.

I know its gone midnight so maybe start planning a better diagram tomorrow. You might need some better paper and a black pen. Or some sort of CAD app. Hope you weren't planning to go to work .... Wink

thebewilderness · 26/07/2018 00:24

Call the contractor and complain. That is who is harassing you, not the neighbors.

m0therofdragons · 26/07/2018 00:31

Sorry, no clue what apps people use to draw diagrams but I work and have 3 dc plus all energy is being used not shouting at neighbours

OP posts:
DiegoMadonna · 26/07/2018 00:31

Is that an illustration from a biology journal for some sort of bizarre new geometric penile fungus?

m0therofdragons · 26/07/2018 19:53

Neighbour actually came round tonight and apologised twice to dh so we're feeling a bit happier that at least they're acknowledging it's a bit shit.

OP posts:
StaplesCorner · 26/07/2018 23:07

They acknowledged that your diagram is shit? Well, at least they're honest .... Wink

DesignStatement · 26/07/2018 23:59

No, tell them enough is enough, you've been more than accommodating and they've been incredibly rude and they can fuck off from your drive, your property, and your peaceful enjoyment of your home. Drink vodka first. It helps to dampen down the British politeness

Totally agree with this.

Tee Hee re phallic drawing! 😂😂

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