So I’ve now ended a friendship of almost 20 years after witnessing her turn from this lovely, caring, giving person into a selfish, greedy, entitled cow. The basics are that I’ve known for almost a year now that she has been lying to friends and family. I won’t bore you with all the details but the jist of it is that she’s been in a happy long term relationship with her partner for years, she has two lovely children but has spent the last couple of years going to great lengths to fool people into believing she’s not in this relationship and she has done a lot of questionable and immoral things to ensure this happens. Well last night I told her straight. I told her that I felt sorry for her and her children and the fact that her and her partner have to keep up a pretence and have dragged their children into it, all for money. They weren’t poor and desolate previously so they had know reason to defraud the government. Their kids have been told to keep quiet about their increasingly obvious relationship and it’s not on. At first I felt a tad envious of the extra money they were getting and the fact they managed to get a council property, which we are desperate for just made it worse.
Well I had a moment of enlightenment shall we say yesterday. I realised that there was no need to feel envious, and what I felt instead was pity. After all I don’t need to hide my relationship with my children’s father. We don’t have to pretend in front of our children or friends and family etc. They might have more money and a nicer house than us at present but we have something they don’t have, an honest, respectful relationship and a relatively happy family. No amount of money can buy that. So I guess my Aibu is really just about me asking was I right to end my friendship. I cannot stand dishonest people. Don’t get me wrong I’m not making out that I’m a saint. I’ve made mistakes but the one thing I don’t do is lie. White lies to save people’s feelings yes, but outright deciept and factoring kids into it is another thing all together.