to be fed up of all these weekends alone

[purplerain000]

DP has a hobby that takes up around half of his weekend days. At least one weekend a month he will go away for the whole weekend (early saturday morning until late Sunday night), and he will also spend probably 2 extra Sundays a month doing this hobby. So 4 days out of the 8 weekend days a month, I'm alone.

I know you're going to say I should find things to do, and I try. I go out shopping, I go on days out, but it gets to a point where even this gets boring or too expensive.

This weekend I have been in the flat all weekend watching TV. My family live far away and I have no friends so no one to see.

AIBU to want him to spend less time on this hobby?

Op, some people who live with a partner would love to have 4 days a month to themselves, but you sound like you are not one of those. Shopping is not going to fill that gap. When your DP is away for a weekend, could you go and stay with your family, or go away with a friend? What about taking up a hobby yourself, is there anything that you have always wanted to do, like archery, horse-riding, cycling, art classes, pottery, body boarding. The ramblers as previously mentioned have walks at the weekend. Also if you like the idea of borrowing or walking a dog, Borrow my Doggy is a good site. Other than that, what about getting a weekend job in a pub or cafe which would mean extra cash and company for when DP is away.

I really enjoy time to myself but even I'd find this a bit much! Is he prepared to compromise, or has he already done so?

If you want to stick with the relationship, you will have to find other hobbies though. I don't know how old you are, but if you're of an age where a lot of other people have children, it can be difficult to make friends as they're normally busy at a weekend 😕.

My DH had a hobby like that when we were younger. He was gone 2-3 weekends per month (weather permitting) from morning til afternoon or early evening from mid-Spring through early Autumn. Before we had DC I'd occasionally go watch, but after DC came along we usually stayed home as it involved sitting around for hours on dirt roads or fields with no loos, which was very boring for DC.

Honestly, I loved the alone time before DC and the one on one time with them after. Even if it meant I had DC on my own almost every weekend. We did baking, went to movies, to the park, to the local mall. But I was lucky in that my DC were both easy to entertain and were also good at entertaining themselves and the fact that we lived in a neighbourhood with other children.

From the middle of June to the end of July dh will hvae spent 5/7 weekends doing his hobby. This has entailed taking Friday off work and disappearing Thursday night and coming back late Sunday. The two weekends he hasn't gone were because ds was home for a week from university.

I understand that he has a stressful job and his hobby means that no-one can contact him etc, but it does get a bit boring when it's every frigging weekend.

DH has a hobby of similar time, he just doesn't go as often as he could, I'd be pissed off if 50% of the time we could spend together he was doing his hobby. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy doing my own thing but we now have kids so I'm basically just looking after them. I also don't have my own hobbies as pre kids we did things together, now he gets to go them alone (it isn't the sort of thing we can take turns with).

YANBU.