To look for another job whilst TTC

[SomethingCleverandWitty]

I am trying to conceive at the moment. We have suffered multiple losses due to my balanced translocation. It is very possible that it may take me a while to carry a pregnancy to term.

I also absolutely loathe my job to the point I come home stressed and upset every day. It is affecting everything from my skin to my eating.

I really want to find a new job but I'm concerned (and bloody thrilled) if I were to get pregnant straight away and carry to term.

I know it's a bit sly to start at another company when I am aware of the chance I may need maternity very shortly after joining but I don't know what else to do.

I was a wreck at first regarding the miscarriages and it's taken a lot for me to get back to normality however I don't want to let this put my life on hold. I don't know how long our TTC journey will take.

You legally have every ‘right’ to look elsewhere. But this is exactly why small business owners act the way you do.

I know it's selfish.

I don't know if it makes a difference but for the job I do, the firm's I'd be applying to are big multi office companies in a city centre. Not small high Street businesses

I’d say larger firms tend not to care 😁

I've changed jobs several times while TTC. Life doesn't stop because you are trying to have a baby. DS took four years to conceive and I was one week into a new job when I found out that I was pregnant with him and he was likely to make it. (Have had several losses before him, one requiring an emergency operation a week before I was due to start another job.)
That said, I'm not working for small companies, either. The time between me being offered a new job and starting it can be about 4-6 months.
Good luck. Hope it all works out.

You need to do it OP if you're not happy at work. I'm in exactly the same boat as you (even down to the genetic issue!!) and I've been TTC 8 years and had multiple MC. My life's been on hold just in case I get pregnant. I'm now at the stage where I have to accept it's unlikely I'll have children but have also left my career to stagnate in a job I don't enjoy... because I was worried about letting people down if I got pregnant.
I genuinely pray you do have your baby in the near future, but also you absolutely must not put your life/career on hold or stay in a job you don't enjoy. Please learn from my mistakes!!

Good luck on both counts!

Sorry for your losses first of all
I did it. I had been ttc for over a year and it wasn’t happening, and was so stressed and unhappy in my job. I did take a short break from ttc until I had actually started my new job so I wouldn’t miss out on maternity pay. Got pregnant three months after starting.
It was the best thing I’ve ever done..

It probably didn’t go down well but no one said anything. I’m still there six years on (after two may leaves) and just been promoted and likely to have a long career ahead of me here. Ok it is a larger company but it’s sooo much better going back after maternity leave somewhere good rather somewhere horrible and stressful.
All the best to you with ttc

Definitely do it. I spent 5 years etc dd and has 9 miscarriages. I have just switched to a job I love and wish I had left earlier. Good luck xx

Sorry for those who have been ttc for so long, I hope my comment about only trying for a year didn’t come across as blase. Of course at the time I didn’t know how long it would take and my point was that you should carry on with your life and you’ll be in a much better place whatever happens if you are happier and not stressed in your job.

Absolutely go for it.

You might not conceive right away. And even if you do I truly believe that employers have a duty to accommodate you - that's the point of enshrining mat leave and pay in law. We've decided that it's a social good for all (or nearly all, I know there's a time condition on mat pay).

I say this as a senior manager.

It's not 'sly' in any way. Men wouldn't consider this so you shouldn't have to either. Do whatever you feel is best for you.

Get another job. Just go for one at a big firm with nice people and work your arse off.

People respect you if you work hard and demonstrate you are good at your job imo.

Thanks everyone! I'm currently shooting off my CV to every man and his dog!!!

Ps. Sorry to those who've been though / are going through a similar thing. Life is so cruel sometimes

Go for it. I found out I was pregnant 3 days into a new job but lost it 4 weeks later. You never know what the future will hold

Good luck.

What will the maternity package be like in a new job if you haven't been there very long though?

I started a new job in the February didn't realise I was pregnant found out in the April I was 25 weeks gone they were brilliant and super supportive there is nothing stopping you from looking good luck

@PinkHorse probably not the best I imagine.

I'm not overly concerned about that side of things though. DP runs his own business which does well so we could manage with low maternity pay if it came to it.