DP has done nothing for me since I got pregnant.

[TetherEnds]

6 months pregnant. Live with DP. Baby very much planned and wanted.

I'm uncomfortable, have ligament pains, breathing isn't the easiest, struggling with this heat, can't sleep much, still working 40 hours a week, kicking baby keeping me awake at night, headaches (the list goes on).

I do MOST of the housework, I do school runs for his DSD as he isn't able to because of work, so basically, much more than my fair share.

He hasn't done anything for me since being pregnant. Not a thing. Bought me flowers once because I asked him too. Hasn't asked me how I am. Hasn't lifted a finger around the house (thinks occasional doing the washing up is enough). Hasn't asked if I need anything. The only time he was kind was when I thought I would have to have a termination, at which point he gave me a hug.

AIBU to think that this is not normal and that my DP should be wanting to give me a hand? I'm not talking about treating me like a queen and not letting me lift a finger, but... just acting like he cares a little?

He's a wonderful father to DSD so I'm hoping that this will be the case for our DC...

Well he's got you where he wants you to be.

Sort this out now! He will be much the same when you have the baby.

Say you are not coping. You need him to do housework or get a cleaner and help with the school runs.

Have you got a plan for the school run when you have the baby? Ideally for the first few weeks you want to spend as much time with the baby and in bed.

My husband will be taking over morning nursery runs for the foreseeable future to give me time with the baby.

The fact that your pregnant is making this so much worse but, just to remove that from this scenario, you are with a man who doesnt lift a finger around the house when you both work full time. How on earth is that fair? He has a really shitty attitude and I am willing to bet a pound to a penny that this is why his first marriage failed.

you are working and doing all the house work and you are pregnant?

No thats not on.

Do you have friends and family?

Does he really want this baby OP? He sounds awful.

You need to tell him straight, something a long the lines of "I'm not happy at the moment. I'm struggling because there's so much to do around the house, and I need more help from you. I don't want an argument and I don't want to leave this until I'm at the end of my tether and end up causing a massive row, I don't have the energy for it. But from now on, I'm not going to be doing x y and z (pick some things you want him to do, e.g. washing up, loading and emptying the washing machine, the hoovering) because they're too hard for me while I'm heavily pregnant."

And MEAN it. Stick to your guns and make it very clear to him that he needs to do those things now. No passive aggressive language, nothing like "I feel neglected, I feel like you don't want me" because that's too open to interpretation and for him to get angry. Keep it plain and simple. Which is hard when your hormones are at war and you're knackered, but you can do this.

Sadly this may be the common issue of men stopping making an effort / becoming assholes when their partner is trapped/ tied to them.

Sorry but can someone tell me what 'DSD' stands for? I have seen it before and assumed, at the time, that it stood for 'Dear Sons Daughter' lol. Probably way off there.

Dear Step Daughter

Claire it's her stepdaughter.

@endofthelinefinally and @Doyoumind Thank you

So he got more custody resulting in you actually doing the work.

So many stepmums end up doing all or most of the childcare for SC .... makes one wonder why they split up.

Seems like a clear sign of things to come. Be prepared to go through with an ultimatum.

"But he should be treating you like a queen"

AuntieStella. But he should. A good partner would bring tea in the morning, tell you to put your feet up, run you a bath, do some shopping, cook meals when they can, ask how you are, etc etc.

You need to put your foot down now otherwise as soon as you go on mat leave and have the baby

I didn’t notice my DH becoming lazier when I was pregnant as I was so exhausted. Then as soon as I had the baby he became ‘too tired’ from to do anything at all at home including a one minute job like emptying the bin. It didn’t matter that I had low iron (so was dizzy every time I went up the stairs) or had forceps so was in a lot of pain whilst caring full time for a newborn with about 3 hours broken sleep per night if I was lucky