Can I learn to swim?

[Doingreat]

I really would like some advice with this. I'd dearly like to learn to swim for health benefits and as a life saving skill. The problem is that I'm terrfied of drowning. I'm not scared of being in the water. But I feel and almost believe I will drown. I do go sometimes and just hold onto the railings and flap the legs around. I took swimming lessons and found the instructor useless. And I feel it must be me. Everyone who was a beginner managed few laps by the end of the first lesson. But i hadn't managed that even by the end of 12 lessons.

Any advice, anyone? Or encouraging stories? Or do I accept I will never learn?

Yes - you can.
You can learn to swim.
Keep going - you'll get there.

I'm 49 and can't swim. I'm like you terrified of the pool as I fell in the deep end as a 3 yr old. I'm thinking of private lessens as the is a pool at the end of the next street to my street. I like you will get in and not too bad with my feet on the bottom but leaving go, I panic I have 6 children from age 27 down to 5 yrs and am also terrified of the youngest not being able to swim and if he fell in I wouldn't be able to save him. So I will do that but this summer my youngest will be swimming like my other kids and will at least be able to right himself.

Former swimming teacher - yes you can learn!
You can get one to one lessons, specifically asking for someone that has experience with nervous learners, you may need to go to a pool further away for this as there’s generally only one or two teachers who will take adults at each pool.
It may be useful for you to go to the pool by yourself a few times, just to get more comfortable in the water itself first, I would suggest a woman’s only session for this as that way you’re more likely to guarantee a mix of other pool users, no lessons going on and minimal children, a day time woman’s only would be ideal but depends on your schedule.
Don’t feel you need to be swimming lengths or even widths after a few sessions. Start slowly with aids, floats and woggles, holding on to the side etc, you need to feel comfortable in the water first, work on floating, then kicking, then incorporating arms. Work over short distances to start, 5m forwards and backwards is a great accomplishment, and not something you should expect from the get go.
Staying in the shallow and working your way to deeper waters should be a goal. Tell the lifeguard when you arrive that you are a nervous non swimmer, that way they’re aware you may easily panic and can keep an eye on you.
When you feel ready I would recommend learning to tread water as this is a key skill and would certainly make you safer in deeper waters.

I didn't learn until I was in my 20s. I got friend I trusted to get me going and teach me just enough confidence to do a few strokes. This allowed me to then attend adult swimming lessons where I was taught techniques.

Since then I have taught 3 or 4 adult friends to get going enough and gain enough confidence to join lessons too.

My mum learned in her 50's, had private lessons with an instructor specifically for nervous learners. Now she loves it. Good luck

There are adult swim lessons available. I would recommend phoning a pool and explaining that you're afraid of water and then asking if they have instructors who could help you. I'm sure it's not the first time they've seen this.

I learned as an adult too, at 23. First I went swimming with friends a few times to try and get some idea of what to do in the water and then I signed up for a group adult swimming class. It kind of clicked at some point and I could finally swim a pool length and do back stroke or breast stroke but I still always stayed in the outside lane where I could grab the pool edge anytime I felt nervous.

I'm still a nervous swimmer and could do with improving some things like how to tread water and would like to learn the front crawl but I am at least able to swim up and down the pool now.

Have you tried adult swimming classes? If not, then sign up for a short course and see how you feel. Then if that doesn't suit, book private lessons that are with someone who is used to helping nervous swimmers specifically. Good luck!

My mother learned at 68. She had adult swimming lessons - it took her a while and they started off in a learners' pool.

Thanks everyone. Will look into one on one swim lessons.
I did have women only group swimming lessons and found the instructor useless. I think i need someone who will get onto the water with me and show me the techniques. I find it all such a baffling mystery.

Found the responses very encouraging. Thanks again all.

Yes, you can learn. You will get over that fear of drowning - it will completely go, as soon as you have proved to yourself that you can stay afloat, and there is absolutely no way you could possibly lose that ability (I had that feeling, and I learned at 32 - one day, that feeling just vanished). I love swimming now. You can definitely do it - promise.

I had 'back to basics' level classes 3 years ago. could not put my face in the water, had not done so in over years. Didn't even like the shower on my face! Couldn't manage a length.

Yesterday I swam the Henley Mile - for the second time too! I'm also a Masters Swimmer. Not a fast one, the others win medals at GB Masters, but I'm working on it.

I'm 50 btw.

Swimming has changed my life tbh, tbh me and my OH are a little obsessed with it tbh, it's a very consuming hobby to get into, so beneficial for mind, body and soul. We train together and it's brought us very close and gives us something to obsess about together.

You absolutely CAN do this!

I had my first swimming lesson last week 😬 I'm 29 and genuinely couldn't swim if my life depended on it. Forget about those other 'beginners' in your previous lesson - I don't know why so many people like to claim they can't swim when actually they can but perhaps just not very well it not with much confidence, and it's thanks to people like them that no one ever seems to believe me when I say I CANNOT swim (and presumably why someone once thought it was still okay to try and throw me in the pool on holiday after I'd said I can't swim, which resulted in me curled up on the floor crying 👍).

Anyway, rant over. My instructor last week said everyone will learn to swim, it's just a matter of how long it takes you. Irritatingly, my beginner adult lesson last week consisted of me and three pre-teens who can all swim. But oh well! I'm not going to let it stop me, going to stick with it and I will crack it eventually! Might see how I get on for a few weeks and then switch to one to one lessons if I don't think the group lessons are working for me.

Also, bit bizarre that your teacher didn't get in the pool surely? 🤔

Try private lessons. I had group lessons and although it got me moving in the water I still feel at a loss. I am starting 121 lessons and feel it will benefit me more as will be at my pace and focus on my weak spots.

I didn't learn to swim until I was 27, had always had falling into water and drowning nightmares in childhood. In my class NOBODY was swimming alone until about the fourth lesson. Certainly not after the first! And our instructors didn't get in the pool either (council-run lessons). In our swim school for children, the coaches are on the side but helpers are in the water with beginners.

Find a recommendation for a teacher of private lessons, maybe go with a friend to work on your water confidence. Our swimming teachers get the learners to put their mouths just under the surface to blow bubbles and strategies like that, it gets them used to the feeling of water on their faces and gives them a feeling of being in control.

You absolutely can do this.

I'm reading this with interest, as I am a non-swimmer who would love to swim. I had lessons with a group of women - no success; one-to-one with a friend in a totally empty hotel pool (I hate the thought of people pointing and laughing, or worse, bumping into me in the water) - no success; I just freeze and panic, I cannot control my fear and panic, and generally end up a crying, snotty embarrassment. But I'm thinking I might have another go, as I'm loving these success stories. I would just love to launch myself forward and swim! Btw, I am very old...

Absolutely you can. Look for a 1:1 instructor who has access to a private pool. When I relearnt to swim after acquiring a disability I found someone with an endless pool and that was perfect as it was private, he could use all sorts of snorkels, floats, and other toys to help me gain confidence which couldn't happen in a public pool

Yes.

I learnt to swim when I was 30, was terrified of water and drowning. I went to a hypnotist for a few sessions first.

OP, had my second lesson tonight so just thought I'd share with you. I swam four widths without a float! Honest to god never would have thought it would happen. I think the difference from all the lessons I had when I was a kid (which never resulted in a single stroke without a float) was that they started us off with our faces in the water and just stopping and standing up when we needed to breathe. So whereas previously I'd start swimming with my head up and then panic when I started sinking and my face went under and then flail about etc etc, that wasn't an issue this time. Honestly, if I can swim there's hope for us all.

And fwiw it was a different instructor this week who didn't get in the pool, so I take back my earlier comment about it being odd them just standing on the side.

You absolutely can learn. I've always been able to swim, but I used to run SCUBA taster sessions and one of my 'pupils' was a lady in her 50s who had just learned to swim and was taking the next step. She was amazing. We started off snorkeling with her hand on the wall and me on her outside and ended up with her fin tipping on the bottom of the pool in full scuba gear, breathing and controlling her buoyancy. Just take it at your own pace and yes, do get specialist one to one if you can.

Op I have really turned my health around with swimming

It’s the best !

Treat yourself to one to one lessons and go for it

I started with breast stroke sedately and I now Plough up and down front crawl

It’s made
Me so happy

Private lessons with the instructor in the pool are really good. You can definitely learn to swim; you just need to find the right environment to do it in.

Tighnabruaich I have taught three friends with your level of fear to swim - one had a full on panic attack at the sight and smell of a pool. They have all gone on to have the confidence to join lessons. If you live in North Lincolnshire I'm happy to have a go with you. I am not a qualified instructor, but I learned late in life and had that fear myself to start with.

I learnt at adult lessons at 16. A bit different that I was never scared of water like many posters, but years of school lessons failed to even get me swimming a width. I needed the instructor in the water to be able to get an effective technique. It took about 4 months to get my 25m badge and from there I was getting new badges constantly and was swimming a mile within a year.

thenightsky thank you, but I am very, very, very far away from you. That's heartening to know though.