To pretend I'm pregnant

[shoelaces]

Rather than tell a stranger they're wrong, I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat.

I've been fatter but also slimmer. I'm not happy with this weight. But this is the first time someone has assumed I'm pregnant. So did I smile and nod?

Or correct them? And how? What would you say?

Has someone actually mistaken you as pregnant or are you just planning what to do in case someone does?

I find it so rude to presume someone is pregnant that when a lady patted my bloated belly and offered her congratulations I looked her dead in the eye and said “I’m not pregnant, just bloated. Take your hands off me.” I was shocked and could imagine that If I wasn’t so confident would have just accepted her congratulations and sulked off.

If it was just a passing stranger I would just smile and let it go. Telling them that i’m actually just fat would be embarrassing for both them and me! I have a bit of a belly at the moment so it could happen! Although, I am a smoker so if someone said it while I was smoking i’d have to tell them it was fat before they started having a go at me!

I just smile now and pretend I am pregnant. It's easier

Really rude of a strangers to assume somebody is pregnant and ask them outright. I find it too easy for people to assume women of a child baring age are pregnant when unwell with sickness too. I had several colleagues ask me ‘you’re not pregnant are you’ me and X thought you might be. The worst case was my previous example included two managers!

YABU absolutely! You need to make people squirm if they think it's ok to assume you (or anyone with a bit of extra fat on their tummy) is pregnant. Before I lost a lot of weight I got this at least once a week. I would always look them dead in the eye and say, "I'm not pregnant, just fat." Their blustering and backtracking afterwards was lovely. And hopefully they will think twice before assuming again and making asses of themselves (and making someone feel pretty shit).

Gosh, I get this quite a lot. I do have quite a stomach so when I lose weight it gets worse - weight seems to come off my arms and legs first.

I do always say that I’m not pregnant. It embarrasses some people. I don’t give a shit.

I am ashamed to admit I have pretended also.

We were living in an area way out of our league financially- a very tiny cottage and invited to a a very posh garden party- my youngest was 6 months old-I was still breastfeeding and my belly was big.
A woman came over and gushed- " oh when are you due?"
To avoid embarrassment (hers and mine) I mumbled " In a few months"

Awful situation.

I did actually get a seat on the train due to this. Obviously I didn’t want to embarrass the nice lady 😜

Ouch a woman did this to me as I escorted her out of a job interview. She didn’t get the job!!!

I was gutted actually. I was desperate to be pregnant at the time.

Oh I didn’t even have a stomach at the time either, they just made the observation because of my age and fact I was off sick with sickness! They also thought because me and dh had bought a house children would be following. Far too much pressure on women to pro create. I do have a child now and apparently they predicted I was pregnant when actually pregnant as well before I told them! It’s madness.

If they assumed I was pregnant I would just look deadly serious at them and tell them I was just fat and thanks for the reminder 😂

Yes someone asked today how I was managing with the heat, and being pregnant. One of the school run mums I bumped in to in a cafe.

So at some point before Xmas I'm going to have to borrow a baby or just blank her forever.

I was too shocked and embarrassed to know what to say. It's also really awkward as we have 1 child and no more due to infertility. So it's a really sore subject.

I was horrifically hung over after being out all night and barely made it to the station loos on my way to work before throwing up copiously. On my way out a woman said to me "Are you alright, dear?" and to my shame I looked her dead in the eye and said "Morning sickness is a bitch."
Hopefully she couldn't smell the waves of gin coming off me!

DH's rule: Unless and until a woman tells you that she's pregnant - or until there is a baby actually emerging from her body - assume it's pies. Every time.

I'm currently 20 weeks and mentioned being pregnant to someone at work the other day (they weren't in the office the day I "announced") and they said "Oh good, I'm glad it's that and you're not just getting porky again*"

*I lost over 7 stone before getting pregnant and had discussed that with this colleague!

I was fat before pregnancy and when someone congratulated me I asked them what they were congratulating me for with a face. People should not assume.

I’ve had this twice since I had my ds. Once immediately after when I had him in his car seat beside me. Really? You really think I’m already so pregnant it shows when I have a brand newborn baby? I had it again a few weeks later. Both times I corrected them fairly politely.

I have a friend going through IVF just now and she says it really worries her that some bloating she’s been experiencing might lead someone to believe she’s pregnant which would be very upsetting as she desperately wishes she was.

I never ever mention it if I think someone is pregnant. I very, very stupidly did it once, years ago, when I was young and foolish. It was terrible. I felt like such an idiot and the poor woman I said it to. Never, ever again. Even if someone looks close to full term I won’t mention it.

I had an elderly gentlemen ask me about my impending arrival. I just told him straight, I wasn't pregnant I just like cake. That shut him up.

I’ve actuall done this the other way round
I was pregnant and was in a foul mood, sick of being questioned and touched, sick of everyone having an opinion
So one day one person too many had commented and the last poor sod got “I’m not pregnant, I’m just fat, but thanks!”
He looked mortified

I did feel bad when I’d returned to being a normal, non hormonal,functioning human

As you are going to see her again, I would text her to tell her her mistake. I’ve actually done this to someone totally awfully as I had mixed up two mums (I knew x was pregnant and thought she was x but was actually y). She told me and I was able to explain why I had made the mistake. She didn’t have any stomach so I’m glad she didn’t keep quiet and feel self conscious. It was literally my terrible memory for names and faces. Needless to say even if I think I know, I never bring it up now!

'm glad it's that and you're not just getting porky again"

I lost over 7 stone before getting pregnant and had discussed that with this colleague!

I had serious fibroids a few years ago: biggest 15cm, 24 weeks uterus. I was definitely a bit bulgy, but thought I mostly managed to disguise it. Spoke only in vague terms to my male manager about “abdominal growths “, had surgery, assumed everyone eventually forgot about it.
Got pregnant 15mo later, for various reasons kept quiet about it until I was around 16 weeks, when I decided my shape was starting to show and I should tell my manager. Him: “Yes, I had been wondering the last few weeks, I thought you were either pregnant or it was your old troubles back again.” Cringe.

I'd say I was not pregnant but I wouldn't add "just fat" as why should I put myself down?

I know exactly how you feel. This happened to me. Dd is an only. My health was shagged after her and was unable to have another child. I’ve now had a hysterectomy.

Text her if you have her number or get her number from someone else. Explain you’re bloated due to medical issues and unfortunately there is no baby. I’d do this simply to protect yourself. Gossip gets round.

This has happened to me several times - I'm slim, but I just look bloody pregnant! The worst was a visiting priest, who hadn't seen me for a few months. He came over and congratulated me, and I genuinely had no idea what he was on about, so I said "What for?" He then proceeded to pat my tummy joyfully and replied "The darling little one of course! When can we expect to see him or her? Do you know what you're having yet?" In other words, total, full-on excitement at my baby by Mr Kipling. Mortified Had to 'fess up, obviously, as the only other option was to kidnap a baby a few months later!

Years ago a month or so after the birth of DD2 someone asked me when the baby was due. I gestured to the pram and said "she was born 6 weeks ago." The woman then angrily retorted (as if her embarrassment at this exchange was my fault) "You should stand up straight then and pull your stomach in!" I can't believe I just said nothing and cried about it later.... these days I'd have let her have it!