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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is disgusting

57 replies

twiggy3839 · 12/07/2018 21:44

I was always taught to brush my teeth twice a day. I can't sleep without doing it, and I would feel dirty if I went to work without doing it.

My boyfriend however, thinks it's perfectly acceptable to only brush his teeth once a day - in the evening. Since we moved in together this has really been bugging me, and I've noticed a slight smell (his breath).

I told him he needs to brish his teeth in the morning but he refuses. He says he doesn't have time/doesn't like doing it. Things got slightly better after a visit to the dentist a few months ago - he had to have 8 fillings and a root canal. This scared him for about a month, and he would brush his teeth twice a day.

Things quickly went back to 'normal' and he only brushes them in the evening again. When I tell him to do it he will just use mouthwash or floss and he thinks that's enough. He spends a fortune on expensive floss but won't just brush his teeth?!

I find it so gross but he won't change. So what I'm asking is, AIBU? Is it common for people to only brush their teeth once a day? It's not a question I ask people in real life Confused

OP posts:
TwinkleToes86 · 12/07/2018 22:11

I could understand if he only brushed them in the morning but couldn't be bothered in the evening. I admit, I don't brush my teeth a lot of the time in the evening because I drink a lot of squash before bed. But I would always brush my teeth in the morning/before work/before leaving the house for something important.

Is he not embarassed or self conscious? I think you need to explicitly tell him that his breath smells. This would be a deal breaker for me.

sexnotgender · 12/07/2018 22:11

That's revolting and would be a deal breaker for me.

GrannyHaddock · 12/07/2018 22:16

Time to give him the brush-off. You can't be doing with that.

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 12/07/2018 22:16

Yuk. He’s a minger.

NauticalDisaster · 12/07/2018 22:17

Yuck! That is disgusting. I couldn’t stay with someone with poor personal hygiene.

Notcontent · 12/07/2018 22:17

I don’t feel I can leave the house (unless it’s just to go to the local shop) unless I have a shower and brush my teeth!!

Rozzzzzalmost35 · 12/07/2018 22:19

I'm a once a day here Blush but always in the morning

Motherof · 12/07/2018 22:31

It’s strange that you’ve only noticed a slight smell since you moved in together,,she you realised he didn’t brush his teeth in the morning,

Original poster
twiggy3839 · 12/07/2018 22:32

The smell has definitely got worse, I think maybe because of the cavities?

OP posts:
Takfujimoto · 12/07/2018 22:38

I just couldn't be with someone who did this, definitely a deal breaker, no question 🤢

How do you kiss him op? pleasesaythatyoudont

I love my DH so much that I've helped put cream in a particularly reluctant and sore bum grape! But I wouldn't think twice about crossing my legs and sipping my lips if he refused to brush his manky mouth morning breath away.

LTB

MarthasGinYard · 12/07/2018 22:40

I had an ex who brushed once a day didn't realise he was such a minger until we lived together ....briefly

Wide0penSpace · 12/07/2018 22:42

Oh dear OP. I had this problem with my ex too. Unfortunately nothing I did or said to him made a difference and his bad personal hygiene was one of the reasons I dumped him.

OwlinaTree · 12/07/2018 22:44

My DH only cleans them in the morning, I think it's grim. He knows he has to clean them if he wants any action though!

comeherepetal · 12/07/2018 22:46

I had to train my OH to clean his teeth at all. So minging. When we finally had DD I said that I wasn't having him setting a bad example and actually sometimes his breath stinks. He now has a very expensive tooth brush and does it most days.

I had the same problem with him showering.

Prestonsflowers · 12/07/2018 22:48

I’d be more pissed off about the fact that he knows you don’t like it and still refuses to brush more than once a day

NorthernSpirit · 12/07/2018 22:54

Lazy. Oh well, when he’s sat in the dentist chair he’ll wished he listen to you. Oh and I bet his halitosis stinks!

Aria2015 · 12/07/2018 23:09

Ewww I don't feel human in the mornings until I've cleaned my teeth! I'd be so self conscious at work with my breath too. It takes literally two minutes, can't he brush them in the shower if he's short in time? I do that sometimes if I'm in a rush.

Italiangreyhound · 12/07/2018 23:12

YANBU.

I doubt I would stay with someone who couldn't be bothered to brush his teeth more than once a day.

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 12/07/2018 23:18

So he gets up in the morning and leaves the house without showering or brushing his teeth? 🤢
That is rank

Ontheboardwalk · 12/07/2018 23:20

I was ill my body shut down and I ended up with infected gums. Everyone worries about bad breath but trust me when something is properly wrong in your mouth you know about it. He must know this as well surely?

Sutely after 8 fillings and a root canal he knows he needs to change his brushing habits.

2LitreBottle · 12/07/2018 23:25

My DP only brushes at night. Showers at night too, so he’s fresh and lovely at bedtime.

He doesn’t have bad breath in the morning (although I may be biased as I always think he smells amazing!) but even if he did, the minute he gets to work he’ll have a coffee, so he would have teacher-breath within half an hour anyway.

I can’t stand the fuzzy feeling on my teeth in the morning but do sometimes forget at bedtime if he’s not here and I go up late. I don’t have any fillings and always get told I have good oral hygiene at the dentist. DP has a few fillings but it obviously hasn’t been swayed by them.

EdWinchester · 12/07/2018 23:48

Omg! He showers only once a day, in the evening too?

Why are you with him? Just rank.

MyRelationshipIsWeird · 13/07/2018 00:30

Omg! He showers only once a day, in the evening too?. Why is that rank? Most people shower only once a day don’t they? I’d rather it was just before I get up close and personal with him than for the benefit of his colleagues (who I’m hopeful are not getting into his pants!)

dadshere · 13/07/2018 00:44

I broke up with a partner over poor personal hygeine, brushing teeth (or lack of) was one of the main reasons. Dump him

Snickerdoodledandy · 13/07/2018 00:51

Well no nookie for him in the mornings then? Or youSad