If you're an identical twin, do you mind if people can't tell you apart?

[DrMadelineMaxwell]

I've got twins in one of my classes. I've taught lots of sets of identical twins and can usually find a subtle way to tell the difference between them, but this pair have me stumped. Their parents can't really tell me how to easily tell them apart.

If they are both talking to me, one has a slightly higher voice, but that's no good if I'm only speaking to one. No freckles etc in particular places that help me tell.

Their friends are equally stumped. And have taken to referring to them by tacking the word 'twin' onto their surname. E.g. It's one of the Twingletons.

I've asked them if they mind. One does. One doesn't. I don't think I'd like it.

We wore name badges through nursery / early years at school until we developed slight differences (different hairstyles etc). Didn't really mind until we were maybe 16 and I just wanted to be 'me'.

I used to teach very identical twins so I can appreciate the issue. Luckily their mum realised very early on this was going to be an ongoing issue so out one in a blue shirt and one in a white one. They ALWAYS wore their colour of shirt! They may have swapped their shirts over, who knows, but the blue was always X and the white was always Y to me!

I think it matters, whether or not they think or say that they mind. Can't you ask parents to give them an identifying feature eg one wears a purple hairgrip or something? Tamba has good advice on teaching id twins I think and on the importance for their sense of self that people know who they are.

At the moment I work on being able to identify them by which table they are sitting on,/which friend they are with so they do get called by their correct name as I can remember it that way. But when they are together it's tricky.

Not sure boys would be too keep on wearing hair grips. :) :) :)

Oh I'd also love to know if twins are pissed off when they get dressed the same?

Do they wear slightly different shoes and or socks? Hopefully once they start losing teeth they'll look a little different but chances are they'll lose them same time 😂

My friend has Id twins but they wear different clothes so I make a conscious effort to remember which is which by different socks or top. At school one wears shorts the other a checked dress but they love to choose their own clothes and thankfully their parents let them be autonomous with their clothes choice and only occasionally put them in same dress/ outfit.

I teach twin girls (year 9) who have the same hair/makeup/earnings every day. It annoys them when they're confused with each other. Even their friends don't know the difference! I just avoid saying their names tb

I think inevitably if they are going to wear the exact same thing and have the same hairstyle then they are going to have to expect this unfortunately. If they get annoyed by being mixed up then they need to wear something different (shoes, or shirt colour if school allows) or slightly different hair.

The twins (2 sets) in my family didn't mind being dressed the same or being hard to tell apart. On occasion they take great delight in being mistaken for each other. Used to swap classes in school, probably swapped dates on occasion.

The only awkward moment I recall was being yelled at while in military for being in the wrong place & not knowing how to explain without upsetting a senior officer.

I have identical girls. Different coloured school polo shirts and different hairstyles worked for us. School was the ONLY time they were dressed identically and they hated it ! They are generally quite forgiving of people mixing then up though. It is harder for boys though they could still have slightly different haircuts.

My girls are just finished P3 whilst they say they don’t kindness if people get them mixed up it’s still nice for them to have their own identity.
They have always picked their own school shoes which are usually very different - one likes flowers on her shoes one likes patent shoes.
Their teachers and classmates always identify them from their shoes.
Outside of school is much easier as they have slightly different styles and would very rarely chose to wear the same thing.
At scouts they are identified by their woggles as they have different colours so they know the girl who’s name starts with R has a red one and the one with a name starting Y has a yellow one

My ID sons will politely correct people who get it wrong!

What has prompted me to reply is reading that other children use collective nouns to address them!! I would be furious if I overheard people addressing my sons in that way and would ask a teacher to discourage other children from doing so. My sons have names, they are not ‘the twins’ or any derivative of that!

I have friends who are identical twins, who unhelpfully work for the same company; in uniform. One wears glasses with clear lenses in, and the other doesn’t, and one always wears brown shoes and the other black.

I am an identical twin and had a teacher in school who called us both twinnie. It drove me mad and she never made an effort to bother to learn who was who or use our proper names. I would have rather she had a go and got the wrong name than constantly call us the same annoying thing. In your situation if they really have you stumped I would maybe ask the mum if they can wear different shoes or socks.

Oh, I definitely discourage it and ask the children to call them by their real names.

Owl, I always try and use their name, but then feel bad when I get it wrong. I'm glad you'd prefer that to not bothering in the first place.

I have very identical identical twins. One wears plaits one wears a ponytail and always have done. They HATE when people get their names wrong.