To show up without a gift?

[Itsallpropaganda]

I have a friend I've known for about 20 years. Over that time we haven't bought birthday gifts for each other's kids, although we do buy for each other. We generally don't see each other on their birthdays anyway as they are in the summer and they are usually away. Her DS has his birthday next weekend and she is running an event that I'm attending along with various other people, she has incorporated a low key birthday celebration into the day...should I get her DS a gift this year as we will see him? Or just a card? Don't want to set a new precedent and have her thinking she has to then buy for my Dd who has her birthday soon!

If you are attending the birthday celebration, then you should definitely bring a small gift. Or maybe a voucher in a card, depending on age.

How old is the child? I'd take along a small token gift, nothing big enough that would make her feel like she needs to reciprocate for your child's birthday.

I’d always take a token gift in those circumstances. If it’s a celebration incorporating the birthday definitely.

Card and a cupcake or something.

If you could perhapa give something that's for use right away, at the event (e.g. novelty balloons or similar), it would acknowledge his special day without setting a gift giving precedent.

Card and a helium balloon would do.

He's a teenager so a balloon may not be suitable but I'll put a voucher in a card!

If you are attending a birthday celebration then you take a gift.