To have lost it with my sister

[Cheery1004]

I was out with family and family friends yesterday for the football and a big event in my home town. Id only had about 5 drinks throughout the whole day so not drunk and same with my sister. It got to the evening and my sister said she was going to walk home alone. My DM said she would get a taxi with her and drop her off. But my sister was being awkward and was in a bad mood so kept replying no I'm walking home.
Obviously we don't want her walking home in the dark alone so I stepped in and said don't be silly. Why are you being awkward. We then started arguing with her telling me to shut up and saying I've been on my phone alot. Which I had as my ExP was texting my about our DS as he was really poorly. He had rung 111 and was keeping me updated. I was then going to the out of hours to meet then when this argument erupted. So I replied to sister yes I have been on my phone because DS is really ill. Her reply was oh woopydoo. So I lost it and stood up and told her how dare she say that about my ill DS. She the told me to f**k off. I had to leave as I was shaking with anger.
My DM is now blaming me and saying I should apologise. I said she should for saying what she did about my DS. AIBU to be angry and wanting an apology.

Leaving a child when he's "really poorly" with an ExP who has to call for medical help just so you can go out and drink is unacceptable.

OP's child is with his dad, not some random exP.

This assumption that only a mother can take care of her poorly child is sexist and hinders women's freedom as well.

You were both being stupid - it's was a petty argument - grow up, sober up, and move on.

Your mother doesn’t get to tell you what to do. However I really don’t think it was a good idea getting before going to meet your ill child and your ex half cut. Was this a one off or do you all drink a fair bit?

drunken argument that both are at fault for

I hope your DS is ok

Both of you were feeling grouchy and, coupled with alcohol and tiredness, you blew up. Hardly surprising. Now it's time to sober up, take a deep breath and sort it out.

I'd be annoyed and it sounds like she was being a dick when you were just trying to make sure she was safe getting home-- but it does also sound a bit like a drunk argument so I would just let it blow over tbh.

It's really up to your sister who is an adult how she gets home, it had nothign to do with you or your mother.

Secondly if your son was that ill, you wouldn't have been at the footy all day chatting to your ex right? So while it wasn't nice of your sister to say "whooptydoo" it wasn't the crime of the century and you were being a bit sanctimonious whipping out the "how very dare you" routine.

*chatting to your ex on the phone about it.

Keep it classy OP. 'Only' 5 drinks?

This assumption that only a mother can take care of her poorly child is sexist and hinders women's freedom as well.

BOTH parents should be home if a child is so ill the parent needs to engage emergency help. Thi isn't a feminist isue, it's a parenting one.

So eIther the Ds wasn't that ill, or yes, the OP should have been home.

Keep it classy OP. 'Only' 5 drinks?

That's less than a bottle of wine. And from ay 2-10 pm not even enough to get you light headed. Depending on timings, it's entirely likely the OP wasn't drunk.

@FriendOfScarecrow, the parents aren't together any more, though.

I know, but if a child was properly ill, they'd both be there, I've done the same with my ex.

So let me get this straight - your ds was so poorly that his father had to call 111 yet you were put pissing it up and you think a slagging match with your sister is your biggest problem?

As someone upthread said - very jeremy kyle!!

Only had 5 drinks? Only???

I walked home late last night, all perfectly safe, it's nice to get air and to have time to yourself and your own thoughts, especially when it's so hot during the day. Being told that I am 'being silly/awkward' for not accepting a taxi would annoy me. She's an adult and can make her own choices. My sister rubs me up the wrong way when she tries to tell me what to do, much more than anyone else having an opinion on my life, sibling dynamics often lead to more childish arguments than you would have with anyone else.

Sounds like she wasn't really in a great place, wanted some space, and everyone was crowding in on that and then getting angry when they've told you what they want and it has been totally ignored. Perhaps asking her what was going on and if she was OK would have been a bit nicer. If I was going to step into the breach I would probalby start there.

Sounds to me like there might be a lot more simmering under the surface between you both than perhaps you'd like to acknowledge.

Just to clear things up. My DS had been fine all day. My ExP only starting telling me he had a temp about 90 mins before this and I was waiting to hear back from him about the appointment at out of hours and what time. The out of hours was in walking distance to here I was so no point in me going all the way back to exP then coming back.
No I wasn't really drunk. 5 drinks in the space of 8 hours plus food too. And my DS is ok it's another ear infection. His dad is capable of looking after him too and I did go back to help out with his at night. So please to the people saying I should have been there I was.
Fair enough I have admitted I shouldn't have stuck my nose in but I didn't want her walking home alone. She lives on a bit of a dodgy street and I wouldn't forgive myself if she was attacked.

Life is short, let it go.
Five drinks in this heat, is enough to affect anyone, though I understand you weren't falling over drunk. Today's a new day !
Hope your little boy is okay.💐

She lives on a bit of a dodgy street and I wouldn't forgive myself if she was attacked.

This is an odd sentiment you are not the protector of her virtue nor her parent. You aren’t responsible for her- fair enough to say ‘it’s dangerous, wouldn’t a cab be better?’ But to not accept her right to make that decision for herself is odd. Far more to row about it.

She shouldn’t have been unkind about your DS, but I do think you started it by trying to assume responsibility for her that she obviously found patronising.

Perhaps your sister was in a bad mood for a reason? Maybe someone said something to her while you weren't there that upset her, or a friend had text her, or maybe she wanted to talk to you about something but you were glued to your phone. Perhaps she just wanted some space and a nice walk on a warm evening to get some fresh air away from big crowds was exactly what she needed.

Also, how were you glued to your phone all day if your ex only text 90 mins prior about DS? And if you were waiting for a text/call from him, you wouldnt have been using your phone anyway?