Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Work travel - I really don't want to go

54 replies

Thereluctanttraveller · 05/07/2018 22:26

But I honestly can't see an alternative. Is there anything I'm missing? Or do I just have to get on with it?

I have a quite senior role which overlaps with a number of areas one of which us performance development / training.

This quarter, senior management given instructions to roll out some extensive training. This has to be delivered F2F to 5 sites in the UK, with over 350 people involved. I am based at the 1 site in the South. All the other offices are in the Midlands/ North.

The training can only be delivered in small groups, and is at least half a day per group. Doing the maths I will need to spend at least a week at each site. All are 3+ hours from home so I will be away for a week at a time.

I just can't face it. But I don't see the alternative. I am running the sessions with another person but there's just the 2 of us. No one else knows the material or is able to travel.

I am dreading being away from home for that long. A night or 2 is fine but weeks at a time...I don't know how I will juggle all my home responsibilities. I feel exhausted just thinking about it.

OP posts:
Shineonpink · 05/07/2018 22:27

I have a similar role. It's horrible. Do you have children?

Original poster
Thereluctanttraveller · 05/07/2018 22:41

I have children yes but they are mid/ late teens rather than littlies. However I am a lone parent, they haven't seen their dad in months (it's Xmas and birthdays if that) and there's no other family around.

My job has never involved this much travel, normally it is a day or 2 a month but normally just a day so I am home that eve. And then occasionally a 1 or 2 night stay. Not weeks.

OP posts:
Llanali · 05/07/2018 22:45

No solutions, but sympathy.

I am in a similar performance improvement role that covers a huge geography. It’s tough. I don’t know what your contract is, but mine is clear- this is a JFDI for me.

Singlenotsingle · 05/07/2018 22:47

If your contract says you are responsible for training, and there is a mobility clause, I can't see any way round it. Sorry, not very helpful.

Neverender · 05/07/2018 22:48

Can you, 'train the trainer'? I.e. train a group to then deliver that training? It sounds massively inefficient for two people to do it all, regardless of the (clear) negative impact to your daily life. I'd recommend trying to get that done instead. Even if you have to spend a whole day with 6 trainers, it'll be worth it.

Myneighboursnorlax · 05/07/2018 22:54

Does the training require you to be there in person? Could you set up a Skype session or similar with each group instead?

ItscominghomeItscominghome · 05/07/2018 23:03

Can you do it when the holidays start and take the with you? Or send them to a relative? But if late teens they will be fine home alone?

TrippingTheVelvet · 05/07/2018 23:05

Could you do the other sites over 8 weeks instead of 4?

stoneagemum · 05/07/2018 23:06

How late teens?
If 15+ time for them to get real

newmumwithquestions · 05/07/2018 23:11

Could you do the other sites over 8 weeks instead of 4?

This sounds sensible - otherwise surely you’re going to miss a lot of employees due to holidays, sickness etc. So 2 trips per site. Each trip will be 2/3 days (only 2 nights) each.

pandarific · 05/07/2018 23:30

Why does this training need to be done face to face? I know f2f is the old standard, but it's not right for everything, (or even most kinds of learning). What's the subject matter? (you can be vague, just an idea of what it is, eg H&S, risk assessment, sales training etc). When is the training set to actually happen? All in this quarter? Have you sight of budgets for the training/could you get access or open a discussion about a investigating a better way to do this?

If the above is irrelevant and it's already a done deal, then Thanks, but otherwise it might be good to investigate and call a few training / digital learning companies.

TellsEveryoneRealFacts · 05/07/2018 23:35

Can you train say 15-20 trainers more extensively to then train back in their offices and skype in for any questions during the session? That is very inefficient and i am sure they would be interested in a better way of doing things. What sort of thing is it?

midnightmisssuki · 05/07/2018 23:35

What kind of training? Easily outsourced?

Original poster
Thereluctanttraveller · 05/07/2018 23:45

Our company has a real thing about all training being F2F. Skype is viewed as really impersonal and not interactive...

There is also general opposition to train the trainer, it's been done before and resulted in really inconsistent delivery and messages. So they like to stick to certain people and always F2F.

I work ft, I'm not here much. I like to be home at nights for my kids - yes they're nearly adults but it's still my house, I'm still their parent. I wouldn't choose o go on holiday without them so I don't really want to be away for long periods with work either.

It's also not like I get anything out of it. I don't get TOIL. So if I travel up on a Sunday or come back post work so I'm travelling til 9 or 10pm...it's my own time but I don't get anything back from that. Obviously I get my hotel and train fare. But that's it. My contract says the usual required to travel based on business requirements etc.

I think the best I can hope for is trying to spread it over more weeks although I bet there will be opposition to that too.

OP posts:
Original poster
Thereluctanttraveller · 05/07/2018 23:50

The best way I can describe it without going into lots of detail is it's a combination of technical updates/ upskilling and softer type skills training.

Under no circs would they entertain outsourcing it!

I know the Skype thing baffles people in other fields (a friend works for a global manufacturing co and every meeting they have is video conference. Whereas ours are often F2F as well. Or the dreaded conference call!)

OP posts:
LurkinMerkin · 05/07/2018 23:51

I feel for you. Is there an opportunity for you to put together a business case for training by alternative means, perhaps initial meeting face to face and follow up via virtual means/ final follow face to face follow up, cutting the face to face down considerably. The presenteeism culture is outdated, people regularly learn via alternative means and the savings could be considerable when you factor in travel and accommodation and your time away from the office.. not to mention the ability to package and market the training to a wider audience than you can easily physically reach ( if that’s something your company is looking to do). X

SilverySurfer · 06/07/2018 00:13

It really depends on whether you were aware that you would be required to travel when you took the job. If so, I'm not sure how you can avoid it. Either way, if it's something that needs to be done and you don't want to do it, perhaps you should start looking for a new job.

I appreciate you want to be home with your family but as your DC are nearly adults, they should be able to cope with your absence.

pandarific · 06/07/2018 00:22

What @LurkinMerkin said. Have a chat with senior stakeholders and try to get them interested in alternative ways of doing this. Proper digital learning is great, doesn’t HAVE to replace f2f if they’re wedded to that personal contact, but can reduce the amount required and make what’s done f2f more effective. Also, as pp said, it’s repeatable /updateable /ready for new hires being onboarded.

Take a look on Fosway (independent body) pick out a few good learning companies and explain the issues with the current training, wishes for improving it and a vague budget and they’ll do you up a proposal; then at least you can see if you can get the ball rolling for a change next time?

NanFlanders · 06/07/2018 00:30

That is tough. I do sympathise. How old are the kids? What do you normally do for childcare if you are away for a couple of days?

LemonysSnicket · 06/07/2018 00:31

Tell me about it. DP is junior and unqualified for another year. He has been made to work away for 3 weeks, then was told as of next month he's spending 4 weeks abroad.

I've been offered a free travel opportunity at work but he hAs 1 weekend between now and September they haven't booked him for so I guess I'm going alone.

I'd tell him to quit but he earns over double my wage - so we can't him afford to.

Employers fucking suck.

Original poster
Thereluctanttraveller · 06/07/2018 01:07

Honestly i don't want my children to have to cope. I don't think its fair on them. There's no other adult around at all. No family, they don't see their dad. My company forget I'm a single parent and that it is just me.

I don't see any way of dissuading them from the F2F stuff. There is no appetite for doing it differently. The training is completely bespoke and for our particular needs, it wouldn't be able to be used externally. I do think my only hope is to extend the timeframe but the effect of that is I won't get any time off over the summer.

My role has evolved over several years and is in no way what I was originally employed to do but any previous training I have done has always been a max of 3 days at a time.

I am leaning towards saying it just isn't convenient for me to be away for more than 3 days at a time and leaving it at that. My employees make a big hoohah about home life balance let's see how that works when push comes to shove.

OP posts:
Itscurtainsforyou · 06/07/2018 01:12

If your kids are fairly independent what about arranging something in school holidays and taking them with you?

That way, if you get a family room at a hotel, they can chill out/explore during the day while you work.

CSIblonde · 06/07/2018 05:19

Why does it have to be small groups? What would help , is larger groups of say 30, You up front explaining & doing examples etc via PowerPoint/whatever, while they follow /try the new system/ process on their laptops. Standard at massive place I work. Small groups would take too much time/resources when it got over 2,000employees. I'm usually in class of 30 for constant legally required training & I learnt just fine.

Rudgie47 · 06/07/2018 05:45

If they are mid to late teens they will cope o.k. Dont worry about them.
I think your best bet is looking for another job where you can stay at home.

goldierocks · 06/07/2018 06:15

Hello OP
It's tough Flowers

I'm a single parent to an older teen. My role also involves travel, which is challenging for me due to my disability & regular medical appointments.

Could you do the Wed-Fri of one week, come home for the weekend then go back the following Mon-Tues? It's more travel, but you get to come home mid-way.

This is what I do. I don't deal with the travel booking side but I've been told it doesn't work out much different than the cost of a Mon-Fri week (Advance First tickets on a specified train are very cheap).

Good luck!